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the view
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The View
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election
Michelle Obama To Host The View
On June 18, Michelle Obama will be on daytime lady talk show The View, and not as some piddling guest, either, as producers originally proposed: The prospective first lady is going to be a full host, just like Cindy McCain, except unlike Cindy she's widely expected to call Barbara Walters "whitey," curse and burn an American flag. As a full host, Obama will get "to help interview guests and participate in the opening 'hot topics,' or banter about what's in the news that day," and also shift uncomfortably as her randy co-hosts ask about husband Barack and his, uh, physical fitness. I guess this is Michelle Obama's big chance to prove to prospective Barack supporters that she's not the crazy, mouthy free-thinker she's been made out to be. Just like a certain other would-be presidential wife had to do 16 years ago. How far we've come. Michelle should totally show up in a burka. After the jump, how the View ladies welcomed Michelle's husband. More »
no surrender
Hillary Un-Concedes Election on 'The View'
Clinton campaign head Terry McAuliffe is clearly going nuts trying to explain anything about the Clinton campaign's strategy of not conceding. He said on The Today Show that if Obama reaches the magic number of delegates tonight (which he will, with victories in South Dakota, Montana, and a few more superdelegates), Hillary will "congratulate him and call him the nominee." This led to the AP explaining that Hil has effectively conceded. The problem is: she hasn't. She called The View to explain her position and upset Barbara. More »
tv
Whoopi's Tax Talk on The View: "Shit"
How many times does astute political analyst Whoopi Goldberg need to tell you, and her cohorts on The View, that they're going to have to raise taxes? "Whoever gets in there [as President] is gonna have to raise taxes. It's B.S. We don't have any money! ... Shit," she mutters at the end of the clip, as the rest of the ladies wisely ignore her. (Click to watch.)
feuds
Star Jones Calls Barbara Walters An Old Slut
While promoting her new memoir Audition, famous interviewer and Dick Van Patten impersonator Barbara Walters went on the Oprah show and dished about affairs with senators, adultery, and formerly obese woman Star Jones. She said that Star was "so obese she could barely walk onto The View set." Ouch! And, true! Barbara then went on to confess that, yes, everyone was lying about Star's gastric bypass, respecting her wishes to pass off her sudden, enormous weight loss as the happy result of Pilates and dieting. Fair enough! The truth comes out! But, ruh roh, Star is of course a crazy person and very angry about this. Her nasty "shut up, old lady" response (from Us), plus video of the Barbara/Oprah interview, after the jump. More »
election
The View Makes John McCain, Everyone Else Really Nervous
John McCain went on lady show The View yesterday, and co-host Whoopi Goldberg suggested he call himself "Jack Mack" to appeal to the youth, which means anyone under 80 as far as the elderly Republic presidential candidate is concerned. In another reminder that he is an angry old man, McCain was scolded for not hugging all the hosts like Barack Obama. He then made an extended joke about being twitchy and nervous, which made everyone watching a little twitchy and nervous on his behalf. Later, he said some political things, but the best part was the hugging and twitching, so it's after the jump. More »
op-ed
Dowd Screams Her Point, Backtracks
Times columnist and walking self-parody Maureen Dowd insists today that "Democrats are trying to sneak up on Hillary, throw a burlap sack over her head, carry her off the field and stick her in a Saddam spider hole until after the Denver convention." Yep, the party is through with Senator Hillary Clinton. "Democrats are coming around to the point Jay Rockefeller made 10 days ago after introducing Obama in West Virginia: 'Democrats always make a mistake by nominating people who know everything on earth there is to know about public policy. I introduced both Al Gore and John Kerry at their rallies. They knew all the policies, but people didn’t connect with them. You don’t get elected president if people don’t like you.'" Plus, the ladies of The View find Barack Obama "sexy," so surely the race is over. More »
conspiracy theories
'The View' Is a Safe Space For Dan Rather
Oh, poor dejected Dan Rather. Dumped by his network, left out of self-congratulatory media parties and solitarily pursuing a vanity lawsuit. Well, at least he has the gab fest of that is the View. Today, he got to pontificate about the election, as well as explain his conspiracy theories about why he was fired from CBS. Joy Behar even called him a "sex god." About four minutes in, Barbara Walters asks Rather about his lawsuit, and Rather gets all Howard Beale-lite. His paranoia got our paranoia going. What personal vendetta is Barbara Walters pursuing by asking Rather about his crazy suit? Did ABC News bigwigs tell her to bring up the case to hurt CBS News? Was 9/11 an inside job? Video after the jump.More »
broken borders
Geraldo Trashes Lou Dobbs on 'The View'
Mustachioed embarrassment to the profession of journalism Geraldo Rivera appeared on The View today, where he castigated fellow blowhard Lou Dobbs for the sorts of things we have regularly attacked him for, but it was Geraldo saying it so we all felt a bit silly. Of course, Geraldo works for noted reasoned advocates of humane, sensible immigration reform Fox News, so this is really just another salvo in the tiresome Fox News vs. CNN (and sometimes NBC) battle. The clip is attached below. More »
"Girl Talk"
OMG everyone, Lu Ann from Apartment 3-G is going to appear on the soap opera comic-strip version of The View. [Comics Curmudgeon]
OMG everyone, Lu Ann from Apartment 3-G is going to appear on the soap opera comic-strip version of The View. [Comics Curmudgeon]
videuhoh
Whoopi Goldberg Reminded Of Own Failures Every Day, But Especially Today
Ohh dear. Not only does Whoopi Goldberg have to suffer the daily indignity of being a chatting head on The View, but now her co-hosts had to go and rub it in that the Oscar winning actress and Oscar hosting actress was not shown in one of the montages last night. Sherri Shepherd prattled on and on about how it must be so terrible to feel so slighted and Barbara Walters inadvertently said that nothing Whoopi did on the Oscars was a Great Moment. Whoopi just sat there, miserable, trying to telekinetically collect the remaining shards of her dignity that were being strewn around the soft-touch set, willy-nilly. Embarrassing video after the jump. More »
tv
Barbara Walters: "What Is A Cougar Woman?"
Barbara Walters appeared genuinely confused when the subject of cougars came up on The View today: "What is a cougar woman?" she asked, wondering aloud if Demi Moore was one. Her sassy young cohosts proceeded to school her on the subject of, ahem, older women who hunt younger men.
the view
Chelsea Clinton's 'View' Outreach Successful
Big news on today's View. First: Joy threw a Super Tuesday party and everyone but Elisabeth showed up. Also: Chelsea Clinton personally called all of them (except Elisabeth) to ask that they please vote for her mother. And they all did, and then they talked about it on The View. Even Sherri! Jesus. Did anyone call Tyra? The Daytime Lady Primary wasn't lost with Oprah! [Jezebel]
kathy griffin
Obstructed View
Kathy Griffin, comedienne and (paid) friend of the gays, has been re-banned from The View by old lady mumbles Barbara Walters. Griffin, who occasionally pokes some fun at Babs, was apparently too mean about the famous question-asker on her last comedy special. And yet Joy Behar's clunkers continue to go unpunished. [PageSix]
Impeach Bush Now!
Why is the president interrupting The View! Fuck this! Sylvester Stallone was just explaining to Sherri why there is so much hurting people in his Rambo movie! Charlie Gibson just admitted there would be no specifics in his little economy talk! At least they're not breaking in during the Hot Topics discussion of how often Smurfette got gangbanged (sadly, no joke).
Why is the president interrupting The View! Fuck this! Sylvester Stallone was just explaining to Sherri why there is so much hurting people in his Rambo movie! Charlie Gibson just admitted there would be no specifics in his little economy talk! At least they're not breaking in during the Hot Topics discussion of how often Smurfette got gangbanged (sadly, no joke).
feuds
Peace Declared
Big fat loudmouth Rosie O'Donnell and former sneaker designer Elisabeth Hasselbeck have reportedly called a truce on the feud that began when they shared a little table on The View. O'Donnell apparently approves of Hasselbeck's infant son Taylor Thomas, the world's newest uninformed nut, saying: "He's very, very cute. I saw him on TV, and I sent him a lovely gift, and (Hasselbeck and I) have been e-mailing each other. And peace prevails." Then Donald Trump jumped out of the bushes and hit O'Donnell over the head with a sack of doorknobs. Hatfields and McCoys, those two!
cute kids
