Say hello to Cassius Marcellus Cornelius Clay, a Yale sophomore whose life changed at Barneys one day, when fashionable rapper Kanye West complimented him on his shoes and, eventually, invited the lad to travel the world as Kanye's right-hand man.
Marketing research firm Civic Science was forced to recalibrate its survey scoring system after finding that "millennials"—children born between the late 1970s and early 2000s—don't feel particularly strongly about anything. Not true! Want to know what millennials hate?
Today we looked at misty-eyed and Dolores Umbridgian newspaper thinker Peggy Noonan, the Lisa Frank of political writing, and how she is terribly scared of young people. This angered one young millennial.
You know what the kids are doing these days? Nothing. They are living in their parents' houses (or houses their parents pay for) and not working. But they are turning their unemployment into a new trend: the Millennial Job Whine.
Today we looked at how America's teens are being besieged by a society that hates them. This prompted two commenters two reminisce about a dangerous teen fad from years ago: those weird clacker ball things.
It's not hard to figure out the attraction of living in your parents' basement. Free rent! Your Mom makes you sandwiches! Awesome. But why is a whole generation of young people kicking it at the 'rents? Science has the answer.
Disgusting lesbians aren't the only things ruining prom these days. Stupid school administrators and awful parents are also doing the rite of passage a great disservice. The latest trend is scheduling the dances on school nights, to curb after-partying.
Since this is my last weekend on the site until I return, begging for a job as James Del's assistant, I've invited some friends to jam with me. Jessica Roy is an young writer finishing her BA at NYU. Jessica?
Since this is my last weekend on the site until I return, begging for a job as James Del's assistant, I've invited some friends to jam with me. Joe Coscarelli is a young writer with Things To Say. Joe?
World's longest-married couple, dishing out relationship advice, on Twitter. You will never be this cute.
If you aren't already familiar with it, ChatRoulette's the hot new form of extreme internet voyeurism (and insanity). Essentially, it's video-chatting with total strangers, and flying through them with a "next" button. And now, its creator's been revealed...
Here's a little thing to make you feel ancienter and terribler than you already do: On Monday, the most watched show of all the shows was iCarly. Yes, Nickelodeon's techno-feminist revision of I, Claudius is very, very popular.
Reading Tad Friend's New Yorker piece about protesting Berkeley students on the plane yesterday, I got to wondering: Why do college kids staging demonstrations piss me off so much these days? Am I stodgy and old, or is Revolution dead?
Do you know what a Justin Bieber is? You should: the 15 year-old star was read the riot act as 3,000 fans/parents descended on a Long Island mall, where his appearance had to be canceled. Fights! Chaos! Teenagers! RIOT!
What's more dangerous, the Swine Flu or the Swine Flu vaccine? 'Depends who you ask. Proponent of alternative medicine Bill Maher tried to make his case again this weekend.
You will soon be hearing a lot about Barack Obama's "Safe Schools Czar." His name is Kevin Jennings, and you will learn that he wants to promote homosexuality, he hates God, and he does drugs.
Cocaine: hell of a drug, but not much for childcare. Imagine if your parents fed you Cocaine Crunch for breakfast. Well, this happened:
Remember Damon Weaver? The young envy of D.C.'s press, who's now Barack Obama's homeboy, was interviewed by MSNBC. They learn that he'd rather be on CNN, and how he wants to interview Michael Vick. They then shame him! His response?
Twilight's Robert Pattinson works with fictional teenage vampires professionally. Little did he know the rabid, bloodsucking adolescent desperation he'd invite by taking the gig. NYPD sources now claim that the cops are looking to take over his overwhelmed security detail.
