We all know that "exhaustion" really means that you're partying too hard (see pic above, taken on June 26 as she exited a London club at 3:30am three weeks before her commitment), but don't want to admit it. Instead, you go with the Molar Defense and try to play us as a bunch of patsies. Even Britney was upfront about going bonkers. In this case, the lie is worse than what she's trying to cover up. Here's what Mischa told Time Out New York in her first Q&A since the hospital.

I went through a terrible surgery-a wisdom tooth surgery, all four removed. It was a nightmare. I've never had surgery before-it all went wrong and I had to have a second surgery and it almost delayed shooting because it was a nightmare to me, because I couldn't deal with the thought of not getting there on time. So with the travel, and surgery and prep for the show-it was hell.

So, was it the surgery that made you look all bloated and strung out in the pictures too? We just want to get on the officially party line here. When asked if it was drugs, she said no. And if asked if her hospitalization taught her how to deal with her emotions or the chronic pain from her botched surgery she says, "Not really."

Just for this, Mischa, we're not watching you play a pill-popping model on The Beautiful Life. Ok, that's a lie, but don't insult our intelligence, OK.

Yes, it's red. And yes, Allison assures us, it's permanent. As permanent, at least, as her two-year stint as a Time Out New York dating columnist (the magazine now brags of its "Julia-free Sex & Dating section") or her overpaid gig as a Star "editor at large" ("an embarrassment" one editor later sneered).

The fameball is not without her assets; she retains her "lifecasting" Web startup, NonSociety, and a deal with NBC's obscure digital channel New York Nonstop, which gives Allison a toehold into the glamorous world of cable-news punditry (she was on MSNBC just this past Sunday).

But as Allison's fellow protocelebs can attest, fameballing in the midst or a recession and reality TV glut isn't what it used to be. And her business grossed just $60,000 last year, before things got really bad.

So while Allison might say (as she did in a recent instant message to us) "I feel like I haven't been on Gawker in eight weeks; it's making me feel happy / irrelevant" and ask if she's "blacklisted," her real problem isn't grabbing attention. It's making a living, and thus a life, out of it.

UPDATE: Regarding the hair, a tipster adds:

Julia was broadcasting for some really random network from a soccer event at Hudson Terrace last night. While she was still sporting that HIDEOUS one piece (it looked Aladdin-inspired) she's wearing in the pic on Gawker, her new 'do was covered by a huge headband. The reason? Apparently the dye turned BRIGHT RED near her scalp over the course of the day, leaving her with noticeably two-toned hair. It looked entirely heinous. In typical Julia Allison fashion, she was bitching very, very loudly about it. She obviously mentioned that it was Anne Hathaway's colorist that did the job so she "should have known better." Yeah, ok, Julia.

Another choice remark: "I was trying to look like Lindsay Lohan but it ended up like the fifth element!!!"

UPDATE 2: Allison wrote in to say her decision to part ways with Time Out was mutual and that she hadn't "lost" her job, as we had it, or "complained" about not being on Gawker.

The Post's report asserts that the actress, who is married to actor Liam Neeson, is being flown back to New York so her family can say goodbye before she's taken off of life support. TMZ claims that's bunk, that she is suffering from brain swelling but is not 'brain dead.' We like their version better.

As for that whole Time Out New York fiasco where they declared her dead, the ever sane and reasonable Perez Hilton is roaring mad at the publication. Because he's a paragon of journalistic ethics. Glass houses, stones, etc.

For our part we're glad that she is not, as earlier reported, deceased and that there may still be a positive, if unlikely, prognosis.

Complete the sentence: New York is…
Eliot Spitzer: …the place where no dream is too big to come true.

If you could have a drink with another Top 40 person, who would it be?
Eliot Spitzer: These days I prefer hanging out with my kids—having dinner and encouraging them to do their homework and put aside Facebook for awhile.

Poor sad Eliot Spitzer. And also ha ha way to betray our trust in you asshole, at least it landed us this awesome new blind governor.

The rumor's not a complete surprise—we were reporting last year that some freelancers were having trouble getting paid by TONY. Our tipsters, though, say that's just a symptom of more serious money problems for publisher Allison Tocci and company:

Middle management has been instructed to reduce operating cost by whatever means necessary. They owe so much money across all their major vendors that it’s just a matter of time before something bad happens — vendors have already stared black listing TONY from doing business with them, because of their delinquent account practices.

TONY has seriously hurt themselves in the eyes of many vendors by not been more proactive towards reducing their ever-increasing debt.

Last year's investment in the website may have sucked away cash that could have been used to pay down debts, our tipster says, and some freelancers haven't been paid "in months." From another tipster:

Time Out NY is in such a critical financial quagmire that insiders speculate that it won't make it to the end of the year. Vendors and some freelancers have not been paid for two years, and that's probably a conservative number. Some of those vendors, including paper suppliers and printers, are ready to stop doing business with TONY until they pay up the hundreds of thousand that they are owed.

Whatever the case, there's certainly some animosity against management and their financial decisions over the past year or two. Any of you had trouble getting paid, or know more about TONY's situation? Email us.

Q I was dating a guy for a long time and we both kept blogs. I used my blog to talk about the things that I did or that I was feeling, and although I talked about our relationship, I never talked about our sex life. I was just trying to be emotionally naked and self-revealing and let the world learn a little bit about me. My boyfriend talked mostly about the Bears and his work, but then he crossed the line and alluded to the difficulties of giving me an orgasm in a few of his posts. Even though it is mostly just our friends who read the site, some of their friends read it, too. Now they know that I have a hard time having an orgasm. That is my personal issue and I did not want it broadcast to our friends. We had other problems, too, and as a result of everything we broke up. I am hurt that he did this to me and even more hurt now that he is seeing someone else and has posted pictures of her and posts about dates that they have gone on. I feel like he is using his blog against me, which only makes me use my blog against him. I am frustrated by this whole thing and that other guys may not want to date me now because they can find out from the blog that it was "so much work" to try and make me come.

A STOP IT SHUT UP JESUS CHRIST.

Update: Ms. Allison asserts, convincingly, that this is "retarded," and adds, "if I wanted to talk about my issues, I would put my name on them. THAT, at least, is more than clear." So this is probably Lodwick's doing.

In & Out [TO Chicago]

Call Julia! [TONY]

A TONY staffer sent a query to his coworkers earlier today asking him to help map out which bars in the city are best for tracking down the elusive lusty older lady. The subject line: "Where have all the cougars gone?" The writer received a message from a self-described "attractive cougar in [her] early 40s, thirsting for some young blood." She wanted to know which bars provided the highest ratio of hot young dudes to "catty, female 20-somethings traveling in packs."

"I have a feeling some of you have also spied cougars on the prowl out and about," our TONY stafffer insinuates. "What watering holes do they frequent?" Yes, readers, which bars would those be? Let's all help enforce societal double standards about sexuality!

"We're doing an issue devoted to critics and bloggers, and, since you're one of New York's top opinion-makers, we want to include your thoughts. Please answer the questions below and send back to me by Monday, November 26 (or even better, before you run off for the holiday). Your answers can be as long as you'd like, though a graph or two is fine. We're going to compile everyone's answers and present different takes in the magazine."

Sure! Let me just ... jot down my deep-thinky responses to eight questions ranging from "We're at this crossroads, where print and online content are intertwined, and no one's sure how it all falls out. In this environment, what is the essential question facing the future of criticism?" to "What basic pre-requisities should all critics have to meet? And how should a consumer deal with the different (undefined) standards for online critic-bloggers and print critics? How should they know who to trust?" (Shut up, college!) to "How does one make an impact online?" as I'm running to catch the Acela! No problem whatsoever.

"The above questions are very general. Surely, we missed something. Have anything to add? Please do." the email concludes. You know, there does seem to be something missing here.

Maybe it had something to do with this, the email Ed sent to TONY editorial coordinator Amy Plitt, on Monday.

With all due respect, Ms. Plitt, (a) the last time we went through this nonsense, it took me four months to get a check, when I was given absolute assurance by EIC Brian Farnham, over the phone and over email, that I would get paid by Chicago, only to discover that his representations were outright lies, and I had to go down to your offices to collect a check cut by YOUR New York office; and (b) your office did not have the professional courtesy to respond to my email, sent almost two weeks ago.

So based on these two explicit communicative failures on Time Out New York's part, something which you are in large part responsible for by way of your responsibilities, I hope you might understand why I am more than a tad vociferous and why I lack confidence in your office's abilities to turn around checks.

If your financial director was on vacation, Ms. Plitt, why did you not simply tell me this off the bat? Why was I the one to call YOU to elicit this answer? Why must I be the one to expend my time because you do not have the decency to communicate honestly about the current situation? I have written for many publications, and the majority of them — indeed, the ones who keep me on board — have the decency to tell me what's going on and inform me, "Hey, we don't have the cash right now, but we can pay you next month." Do you honestly harbor the impression that I labor for your magazine out of some benevolence? I'm a professional, sweetheart, but I'm not a whore who works for free. What would you think if TONY suddenly withheld your regular checks as "Editorial Coordinator" and didn't respond to your requests for clarifications? I suspect you'd feel similarly. I suspect you'd probably be more indignant than me. Thus, it is not unreasonable for me to expect a definitive answer.

Gah, why is it that the kind of person who calls a woman he doesn't know "sweetheart" is nearly always the same kind of person who uses multisyllablic words to sound smart and blogs about his problems?

Well, it's sad but it's true. At least one freelancer we know hasn't been paid by Time Out New York for pieces appearing since June; others haven't been paid since August at the weekly listings mag.

But!

Editor-in-chief Brian Farnham, who is extremely good-looking and very kind and also just wow, really good-looking, sent around a memo to the unpaid freelancers just a couple weeks ago!

From: Brian Farnham
Date: Sep 21, 2007
Subject: late payments

Greetings cherished freelancer!

If you're getting this you're one of a handful of writers waiting on a check — please let me apologize for the delay and assure you it IS coming. It's been a summer of accounting snafus here at TONY but
they're fixed now and the machine is just catching up with the backlog.

Having once freelanced myself I know how aggravating it is to do hard work and then not get paid promptly for it, so believe me when i say I appreciate your patience. Hopefully you enjoy writing for TONY as much as I love your writing, and I would hate for this to come between us.

Hang in there, and apologies again.

Best,

B

EXT. BAY BAR
The Sunday noon crowd at Bay Bar consists of those running in and out to get iced coffee products and those sitting at tables enjoying iced coffee products. VISORGAY, wearing olive drab cargo shorts and a navy mesh Nike visor, sits with TANKGAY, in olive drab cargo shorts and a robin's egg blue tank. They are at a prime table overlooking the harbor and the boardwalk that runs along it. Across the water, unidentifiable shrieks can be heard.

Previously: The Pines Party

Matchmaker's mark [TONY]
[Image: Meghan Petersen]

Share-ing Is Caring [TONY]

You can even vote on which "hipster" touchstones are still "cool." We'd encourage you to go over there and make sure that Gawker continues to fall into the "played out" category. We'd consider it an honor to be lumped in with "Murder Mystery Parties" (wtf?) and "Cocaine (the drug)." Also, have you heard of this new hot neighborhood called Greenpoint?

"Taking me somewhere fancy and knowing how to order wine used to blow my mind," says Rachel, 34, a lawyer. "But alas, I'm now spoiled."

Lost in the "Male" [TONY]