Gawker
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gossip roundup
Renee Zellweger is the Tiger in Bradley Cooper's Bathroom
Bradley Cooper and Renee Zellweger are so doing it, Kevin Jonas is engaged, Hayden Panetierre is totally naked in her new movie, Tinsley Mortimer is dating a German aristocrat and Mischa Barton gets kicked out of a London nightclub's bathroom. More »
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Comment by Limitedappeal: Hayden Panetierre looks like a very pretty schoolboy. I certainly wouldn't class her as sexy. 8 Responses | Other threads
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gossip roundup
Kelly Bensimon Accused of Owl Theft
More bad news for Kelly Bensimon. A socialite gets engaged, and an actress turns 30. Plus the requisite Jennifer Aniston sadness news and word of Madonna's continued disgraces. More »
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Comment by crotchety: Is that the hotly contested owl pendant design shown right there in that photo? If so I don't think Celeste... 7 Responses | Other threads
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reunions
Tinsley and Topper Mortimer: Together Again?
Oh thank the blue heavens. Socialite-philosopher Tinsley Mortimer, who designs fashions and talks like a bird, was spotted with her estranged husband, Topper, at a fancy uptown party last night. More »
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Comment by everfade: Has anyone seen Minsley Tortimer since the untimely execution? 4 Responses | Other threads
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open caption
"I Wanted a Hair Hat Made of Raincoats So My Hair Would Never Get Wet but Guadalupe Said It Was Too Hard to Sew So I Made a Hat Out of My Regular Hair."
[Socialite and my close personal friend (in my imagination) Tinsley Mortimer sporting a new (to me) 'do at Fashion Week; image via INF] -
socialites
Tinsley Mortimer Headed for Divorce??
Have über-socialite Tinsley Mortimer and her hilariously-named hedge fund hubby Topper called it quits? Proving it still has reason to exist, the New York Post's Page Six whispers that it might be so. Wicked! More »
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Comment by Iceland Spar: What else could you expect to happen once a certain undead, bloated corpse that walked amongst us was executed for... 7 Responses | Other threads
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open caption
Singer Takes Strange Trip Into Tinsley Mortimer's Head
[Lily Allen filming a music video across the pond; image via Bauer-Griffin] -
television
Entourage: Too Many Celebrity Cameos
Oh, look. Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester was on Entourage last night, recurring her first season role as a virginal (sorta) singer and love interest for Vinnie Chase. We're not sure this exactly counts as a cameo, considering this was already an established role and Leighton Meester isn't exactly a cameo-worthy household name yet. But there were three other big cameos on last night's episode. And that, maybe, is three cameos too many. More »
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Comment by Cheap Shot: Ari is brilliant but over the top. Johnny Drama is the funniest thing on there if you get how insecure... more » | Other threads
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reality tv
Five Socialite Reality Shows That Will Soon Be Upon Us
Mad Men is collecting dust on my DVR queue. There I admit it. I've fallen like three or four episodes behind. It's not that I don't like it. I do! It's wonderful (if slightly, horribly depressing)! It's just that I have so much television to watch for work. And, unfortunately, Mr. Hamm & co., it's not going to get any better. A spate of reality shows—some old, some new—will soon be tumbling out of the gate and into our living rooms. Many of these shows, sadly, feature layabout socialites like Olivia Palermo and Kelly Killoren Bensimon. I've compiled a little rundown of these shows for you after the jump because, well, who doesn't like a Monday listicle.
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Comment by JinxyMcDeath: I wrote into Gawker Stalker because I saw JA backstage in the tents at Bryant Park - wearing a bright... 4 Responses | Other threads
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open caption
"Hello Camera. Do You See The Ghost Next To Me? I Think She Is a Nice Ghost Because She Wears Pink. Do You Like My Dress? It's Made From Colorforms That Guadalupe Gave Me For My Birthday. She Says I'm Good At Them."
[Socialite Tinsley Mortimer (on the right) with Aubrey O'Day, CEO of the Danity Cane Company, at the Custo Barcelona show; image via Getty] -
open caption
[The tail end of the Betsey Johnson show at Fashion Week today; image via Getty]
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open caption
"This Is a Smazagine But Also a Picture Of the Ghost That Lives In My Closet..."
[Tinsley Mortimer, socialite and handbag designer, added: "I am scared of the ghost because I think it wants to steal my hats. I put ghost pellets in a little trail leading out of my closet and into the hallway so it will eat them and follow them out of my room. Guadalupe says the ghost pellets are just Goldfish Crackers but I don't believe her." She then tumbled down some stairs and lay there for hours, purring and clucking like her favorite made-up animal, the "Kittychicken." This was at Fashion Week today; image via Getty. Oh, also, this horrible thing exists.] -
reuters
Wait, Why Is Reuters Writing About Tinsley Mortimer?
The Associated Press has a celebrity news division, writes long fluffy trend stories and offers opinionated (and controversial) political analysis. So while we haven't really been keeping up with what's going on at Reuters, we probably shouldn't be shocked that the newswire, once focused on financial information, just issued a long feature story asserting that 1> Tinsley Mortimer exists, and 2> that she heralds a new era in which New York socialites like herself pretend to have day jobs. Staying focused on business news seems to have paid off for the tyrannical regime that runs Bloomberg, and there seems to be plenty of high-impact finance stories to chase at the moment, but the temptation to swerve lanes on the information highway — newspapers making video, TV shows soliciting user-generated content, media gossip websites covering the Republican National Convention — is strong. Especially when you can always argue a connection to your core competency — in this case, that rich girls who don't need to ever work now feel the need to start their own businesses: More »
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By Ryan TateComment by Miss-Pringle: Are these handbags made in China or by downstairs staff? Come on Reuters, put some shoulder into it. 6 Responses | Other threads
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happy things
Tinsley Mortimer Gossip Girl Details Revealed!
So, um, the first episode of Gossip Girl (9 muthafuckin' days y'all) FEATURES TINSLEY MORTIMER. We knew the brain-addled, handbag-designing socialite was cameoing, but we didn't know it would be the first episode. "...Dan has spent the summer assisting a famous author, but decides to head to the Hamptons to see how things stand with Serena after a summer spent apart. While interning for Eleanor Waldorf’s company, Jenny sneaks an invite to a much-coveted Hamptons’ White Party at which Eric introduces her to socialite Tinsley Mortimer." [TeamSugar] Tinsley talks about her experiences on the show after the jump. More »
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Comment by GypsyStrats: I love this deeply. It sounds like Junie B. Jones. more » | Other threads
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By Ryan TateComment by I Don't Get It: Baby schmaby. How Matty get all his hair back? more » | Other threads
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socialites
The Sound of Tinsley Mortimer's Voice
Socialite/"handbag designer" Tinsley Mortimer's voice—and face!—is wonderfully blank, which I think is what makes her so American. She's an empty room waiting to be decorated, a blank canvas, a work-in-progress constantly looking for ways to better herself. We can all find a way to project our needs and desires onto Tinsley. For example, haven't you ever wondered what your life would be like had you been born a blonde with superlong wavy hair? She's never sarcastic and always earnest to the point where you think maybe she's making fun of herself—not that she would ever stoop to that level of discourse. She's also been getting some TV time lately—click for her latest CNBC spotlight, via Park Avenue Peerage. What she does is not the point; the point is that Tinsley simply exists. (Or, as the Japanese call her, "Tins-ree!" She is huge in Japan.)
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By SheilaComment by Logged Hours: Tinsley Mortimer : New York :: Heidi Montag : Los Angeles more » | Other threads
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tinsley mortimer
Hey Boop Doop Machine, It's Tinz
Hey listen, it's socialite Tinsley Mortimer's outgoing answering machine message! (People still have answering machines? People still have landlines?) It's pretty straightforward and, luckily, it cuts off before you can hear the "thud thud thud rattle thud" of Mortimer falling down the stairs directly after.
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Comment by SW-2: @Richard: I seriously need to see this as an SNL sketch. Maya Rudolph as Guadalupe, blonde host-of-the-week as Tinz. more » | Other threads
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casting
Tinsley Mortimer To Guest on Gossip Girl
Good gravy. Tinsley Mortimer is making a cameo on Gossip Girl next season, which she filmed over the weekend in the Hamptons. The handbag-designing, gobbledygook-talking Upper East Side socialite is a natural fit for the Upper East Side teen soap, we think. One wonders if she'll be playing herself or a character, perhaps named Brinsley Lorimer or something (who maybe eats banana peels and falls down the stairs a lot.) It's somewhat exciting news for Mortimer fans who were undoubtedly saddened by the untimely passing of her scuttled reality show. ("It was incredibly boring. The project is dead." Ouch!) Tinz joins fellow socialite Lydia Hearst, who guested on the first season finale back in May. Above is a picture of Ms. Mortimer on the set (via INF), and after the jump is an exclusive clip from one of her GG scenes. More » -
tinsley mortimer
Tinsley Mortimer's Reality Show Is Dead
That was fast: In March a casting call went out for socialite Tinsley Mortimer's reality show, and apparently MTV has already shot — and rejected as too boring — Mortimer's show. According to Page Six, the cable network's producers, who by this point are surely experts in whipping up drama from the barest of reality TV ingredients, couldn't make anything of the footage: "She looked good but she just got dressed and went to parties every day and didn't have anything interesting to say," a tipster told the Post. Uh, right, because reality television is all about stimulating conversation, and Mortimer was hired for her intellect. Translation: She didn't get into any brawls, do enough drugs, say anything racist or have a sufficiently interesting sex life. The show getting cancelled is a no-lose situation for Mortimer. She either takes it happily in stride or has gigantic breakdown that brings back the reality TV crews and launches her into broader starletdom. [Post]
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By Ryan TateComment by MisterLincoln: Nixed show, eh? That explains the long face. more » | Other threads
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gossip girl
Loathsome TV Characters Fashioned After Loathsome Real Life Characters
Ever wonder what the inspiration is behind the fashions on Gossip Girl (other than "money" and "bright enough colors to attract fourteen year olds and macaws")?? Well Vanity Fair recently interviewed the show's costumers, Eric Daman and assistant costume designer Meredith Markworth-Pollack, and they divulged their interests and inspirations. Kate Moss, she of the cocaine-aura, is the inspiration for messy-chic Serena, while Anna Wintour and Audrey Hepburn inform Blair's buttoned-up old New York styling. Put them together and who do Daman and Markworth-Pollack envision? New York's favorite stream of consciousness-talking socialite, Tinsley Mortimer! [VF] A choice quote from the interview after the jump. More »
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Comment by iAlreadyHateYou: Aw come on! Audrey Hepburn is anything but loathsome. more » | Other threads
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party pictures
Men's Vogue Writer Makes Implausible Gangster
It was hard to imagine anything less menacing than Hud Morgan in a bar fight, but a helpful tipster has supplied one: the Men's Vogue writer, dressed we presume as a gangster, at up-and-coming socialite Serena Merriman's fancy dress party, last weekend in Little Compton, Rhode Island. 28-year-old Morgan, a former gossip columnist with the New York Daily News, fancies himself the caddish man about town. For a microsecond, his liaison with a 17-year-old starlet even gave him a touch of credibility. But the fruitini-loving reporter has always been betrayed by his taste in clothes—technicolor sweaters and scarves worn with as much respect for his surroundings as an Olsen in sunglasses, which tend to undermine his masculine charisma. And, here, he's betrayed again. More »
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By Nick DentonComment by SSteele: The purple queen is pretty cool though, with the weirdo glasses. more » | Other threads
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lydia hearst
Democrats Losing the Self-Important Socialite Vote
Page Six Magazine continues to publish the ramblings of Lydia Hearst and we love them for it! This week's installment of The Hearst Chronicles finds the publishing heiress weighing in on the presidential race. The great-granddaughter of William Randolph Hearst (who has dropped dad's last name, Shaw, faster than she dropped those 15 pounds to become a model) is tired of Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama's "obnoxious" Hollywood endorsements and "petty" throwdowns. The heiress writes: "this young lady is pretty bored with the whole thing. Not only are the Democrats losing their grip on my vote, their divisive antics just might be driving my crowd away entirely." You hear that Hill and Barack? She's bored. Quick, put on something shiny! Meanwhile, we have a hard time believing that socialites would fault others for petty in-fighting. After all, they did practically invent the concept. Just ask Olivia Palermo who, after being literally elbowed from the society scene by Tinsley Mortimer & Co., has slinked back to The New School from whence she came. To see the scan, click the thumb and watch it grow! -
heroes of mine
Tinsley Mortimer Talks Like I Think
It wasn't made up! Tinsley Mortimer does talk in weird, nonsensical sentences about strange things, like I imagine her to. New York magazine caught up with the socialite at the Takashi Murakami celebration at the Brooklyn Museum last night, and managed to get some choice quotes out of her, mostly about funny little Japanese things. Find some quotes after the jump. (Also, a personal vindication/hideous embarrassment: this was sent directly to me, and not to "tips." People are catching on.) More »
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Comment by Charlotte Rae's Web: She borrowed Hello Kitty's plastic fake brain and soul. more » | Other threads
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the life
Socialitis
An epic battle rages on the internet today: Is socialite and aspiring actress Serena Merriman the next "It" socialite? Park Ave Peerage commenters are hotly debating the issue in a post featuring party photos from a Frick museum gala over the weekend. Some of the Peerers seem to think she looks great, but that it's just a nice picture. Others think she's going to be a star. But don't worry! Perpetual favorite Tinsley Mortimer is still the top dog. It's just fellow teeterers Byrdie (Bell) and Chessy (Wilson) who have to worry. (Nota bene: I have no idea what any of that just meant.)
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Comment by famousauthor: @TheNurse: Only for her "Girls Gone Wild" episodes. And her appearances on Pastor John Hagee's television show. more » | Other threads
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socialites
"Pink's My Favorite Color" -Tinsley Mortimer
NYLON magazine's gushy profiles have always been hard to stomach (all that unprocessed sugar!), but their contest to win Tinsely Mortimer's Dior lip gloss makes the uptown socialite appear hip to even the downtown crowd: "It Girl Tinsley Mortimer traipses around Manhattan in hot pink, rose, and fuchsia frocks, so it was only a matter of time before Dior—a brand that she is a Beauty Ambassador for—would fashion a shade from her signature color." She's always been happy to lend her name out to practically any brand or event, but speaking of being an Ambassador: she's huge in Japan? [NYLON] -
open caption
Betty Crocker Dessert Recipe Terrorizes Manhattan
[Socialite and philosopher Tinsley Mortimer outside a Versace event in midtown Manhattan yesterday; image via Splash] More » -
reality tv
Tinsley Mortimer To Have Reality Show??
Oh. My. God. Tinsley Mortimer, famed New York socialite and personal hero of mine (sort of), may be cobbling together some sort of reality show. Guest Of A Guest got a tip that this casting notice is referring to the blonde dynamo. The casting calls for "the nations [sic] most ambitious, driven, stylish and socially conscious young debutantes of pedigree from all over the country [looking] to propel your careers, social standing, and your causes onto the world stage with New York's reigning socialite princess." Could this be Tinz?? Is she still reigning? Is there some other be-Chooed teeterer that has knocked her off the throne? We will, of course, keep you pathetically, desperately updated. Woot! [GOaG] After the jump a very important (i.e. fake) quote from Ms. Mortimer. More »
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Comment by onebadclam: Was there no female Gotti available for this travesty of a tv show? more » | Other threads
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open caption
"I'm In a Foreign Country. I Think It's Called Paris and It's a Little Cold! Do You Like This Yellow Thing? It Holds Up Pants. When I Am Wearing Pants. OMG, Is He Still Looking? I Think He's A Spy. Or A Paris Person. Woots."
[Socialite and arguably my favorite person Tinsley Mortimer at a Paris Fashion Week event yesterday; image via Splash] -
magazine mashups
The Harper's (Bazaar) Index: Designer Diets, Little Miss Mortimer & Lindsay Lohan's DUIs
Do people get confused by Harper's Magazine and Harper's Bazaar? After all, the luxury goods industry is not so different from Halliburton — shameless, ubiquitous, and sooo fucking talented at charging more for less. So again, we're taking things to their (ill)logical end with our own "Harper's (Bazaar) Index", inspired by Harper's famous feature, which parses the world of big oil, big money, big politics and Big Pharma and puts it into easily-digested numerical form. After the jump, Intern Cheryl and I "discuss" designer diets and increasing cost of food worldwide; women who marry for money (socialite Tinsley Mortimer?); and suggest that perhaps Lindsay Lohan's alcohol problem would have been even better enabled if she'd lived in Seoul, South Korea. [Jezebel] -
socialites
Tinsley Mortimer Was "File Sharing," If You Know What We Mean
Here's a question from a PR agency that we just can't figure out: "Was New York socialite Tinsley Mortimer doing a little "file sharing" over the weekend?" WHAT? This is the lead to an email blast promoting some file sharing website in a very roundabout way. But we have to admit we're stumped by that opener. Why the scare quotes around "file sharing?" What are they really trying to say about Tinsley Mortimer? This is supposed to be making her look good, you crazy PR people! The more we think about it, the more dirty theories we come up with, which we will tastefully not print here. Some of you are pretty media savvy, though; what the hell does this mean? Full retarded yet cryptic email after the jump. More »
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Comment by famousauthor: "File sharing" is not the same thing as "nail clipping," is it? more » | Other threads
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open caption
The Inside of Tinsley Mortimer's Head
[Japanese actor Taichi Saotome arrives for the Japan premiere of "The Golden Compass" in Tokyo; image via AP] -
open caption
"Oh Hi Do You Like My Curtains? I Decided To Wear Them. This Woman Is Tall! A Giant! I Like To Yell That Word Giiiaaannnt!! I Think I'm In Someone's Attic. I Want To See A Ghost And Be Friends With It And Marry It."
[Socialites Byrdie Bell and Tinsley Mortimer at a New York City boutique last night; Image: Patrick McMullan, via Park Ave Peerage Click thumb for larger.] -
overheard
Slow Night
Last night, 11:50 pm, one paparazzo to another outside Waverly Inn: "There's nothing in there except Tinsley Mortimer." -
open caption
[Socialite Tinsley Mortimer at New York's Fashion Week yesterday; image via Bauer-Griffin]
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open caption
"Wait Who Are You? Do You Like My Red Thingy? My Feet Hurt, But Are Warm. I Have A Coat, See? Where's Guadalupe? This Is Heavy. I'm Hungry. Yelling. I Am Yelling."
[New York socialite, and my personal muse, Tinsley Mortimer out and about in the city today; image via WENN] -
thanksgiving
A Gawker Thanksgiving
Every year Gawker commenter and ad sales guy (and the best argument for abolishing the divide between editorial and advertising) LolCait has a super special Thanksgiving in his mind. There all of his and your favorite characters meet and dreams come true. This year Laurel Touby hosts.
More »
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By Joshua SteinComment by PimpMyCouch: I am far too late to this party, but this is top-notch. LOLCait, any way you could also do this... more » | Other threads
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advice
Tinsley Mortimer Dispenses Excellent Advice On Love
"This party is so 'Buffy.' I don't mean like the T.V. show Buffy, I mean like these people might all be named Buffy. I'm surprised they didn't bring their tennis rackets," a rumpled cigarette-smoker was saying just outside the party for the second book in "The Upper Class" young adult series at Tailor last night. Well, sure: The party partly was a reunion of sorts for kids who went to Hotchkiss, the posh Connecticut boarding school the books' three authors attended. But party cohost and Heatherette designer Richie Rich had also brought with him a strong contingent of people who work in fashion or at the very least have been on a reality show about working in fashion. And holding court in a corner was the party's other cohost: The most popular boarding school girl of all time, Tinsley Mortimer. The exhilarating ripple of her voice was like a wild tonic in the rain. But Tinsley herself was less like a tonic and more like one of the bubblegum vodka martinis ("bazookas") being dispensed by the open bar: Totally sweet and not at all horrible like maybe you'd expect! Nikola Tamindzic captured the moments.
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By Emily GouldComment by Hoyaheel: Skip Mattoon retired at the end of last year--Malcolm McKenzie is the new Head of School (H'kiss alum, had to... more » | Other threads
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careless people
Tinsley Mortimer's Better Half Is Drunk, Shy, Balding, Nice
"Neither was eager to discuss the first marriage. Mr. Mortimer, when the matter was first raised, pretended to ignore the question and then jokingly kept asking a reporter if he had tried Mrs. Mortimer's 'famous meatloaf.'" That canny Topper Mortimer sure knows how to manipulate the press, huh? That's from Eric Konigsberg's kind of awesome profile of the mysterious husband of "New York's preeminent young socialite," Tinsley Mortimer—the man who is the source of her connections and her money but who is almost never seen with her at parties. Because: He thinks benefits are bullshit! More »
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By Emily GouldComment by KarenUhOh: @the earl grey: The Penningtons were TPIR. My older brother kept that Playboy Pet of the Year issue with Janice... more » | Other threads
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the gilded age
26-Year-Old Not-At-All Rogue Trader Named Chip Totally Fired
Things are super-fun in finance right now! Richard "Chip" Bierbaum, who is related to megasocialite Tinsley Mortimer (his stepfather is Tinsley's husband Topper's father's brother! Parse that!), and five of his bosses were cruelly let go from Calyon, the i-bank arm of Credit Agricole SA, over monster losses of $353 million. Mr. Bierbaum disputes that any of this is his fault and that he most certainly was not maintaining what the company called an "unusually large market position'' that was "above the authorized limit." -
gossip roundup
Jessica Simpson Ruined Britney's Comeback Chances
- LOL du jour: Britney's ratty VMA hair extensions were from Jessica Simpson and Ken Paves' product line. [TMZ] More »
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By Emily GouldComment by VoxPopuli: Wow, who knew that Pete Wentz looked better WITH the eyeliner? It serves as a distraction from his rather equine... more » | Other threads
tinsley mortimer
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