As Horace Mann is a famous "prep" school, the students are now "preparing" for heated and ridiculous political correctness fights they will have at college.

Apparently, "former SBP and current comedian Scott Rogowsky '03" got a laugh at the assembly by saying the word "bazongas." Which led, naturally, to a wonderful op-ed in The Horace Mann Record by student and Assembly Committee member Leah Byland about how this reveals a misogynist double-standard. We quote: "If I were to bring up 'bazonga' cancer in my biology class, I'd probably be sent out of the room." Yes, well, that's a facile analogy because any rational person would agree that certain expressions are more or less appropriate based on context and audience and also HA HA HA HA "'BAZONGA' CANCER."

In the following issue, well, jeez. There was "Editor's Take: On 'Bazongas'" And then "Editor's Take: On the Editorial." And then a letter to the editor from a member of the English department praising Leah's "inspired outrage" and damning the anonymous editors who dared defend "bazongas." There is also a news story on the whole outrage. It is delightful. From a distance. A great distance.

Hello, editor Nick Gerad:

Moreover, the speech as a whole was deliberately written to be absurd. A large portion of it was dedicated to describing a Freemason-esque secret society of former SBPs that controls major worldwide corporations. Rogowsky spent a significant portion of his stage time describing massive, to-the-death street melees between students and sewer monsters called "grawl dogs."

What? Also, why won't anyone tell us if Charles Stam was involved?

She critiques Us Weekly and the other glossy rags on the newstands she whizzes by in a black SUV. She urges that even though, yes, she is a big time celebrity training to play a latex-clad superhero in a big, big movie, she is just like us. And she offers some statistics from the unfortunately named National Eating Disorders Association that are, of course, sobering: 10 million women and 1 million men suffer from dangerous eating disorders in this stupid country of ours.

So, she'd like to dissuade girls from trying to crash diet like their favorite shiny celebrities. (Don't try this at home, we're professionals.) To drive home the point that she works hard for whatever body she does have, but that she does it healthily and that exercise is good for everyone and magazines lie and ohhh We Are One.

Which is all well and good! If a bit self-important. But at the end she adds the little dig that, we suspect, sparked the whole rant:

I'm not normally the type to dignify toilet paper rags with a response, but in this case I feel it's my responsibility to comment. In a way, I'm glad some dummy journalist (and I use the term "journalist" loosely) is banking on my "deflating" so that I can address the issue straight from my healthy heart.

The 'deflate' refers to this post, written by our own Journalist Ryan Tate, who, tipped off by a Page Six item, noticed some shrinkage. Of boobs.

We support your non-crash-dieting advocacy and condemnation of gross fattie-fat-fat stories.

But we were just talking about your cans, love. Your precious, precious, career-making cans.

The deal was ironed out yesterday, but Hooters would not reveal how much it paid for the rights. Hooters said the owners and the jockey approved the deal.

"We have a great relationship with UPS, but Hooters has a great plan to have 450 of their restaurants doing a Big Brown day," Wietsma said.

Hooters is also going to slap its logo on the jockey's legs, and, if Big Brown wins, he will "be greeted by busty Hooters girls in tightfitting T-shirts."

Stay classy, rich people.

[NYDN]

She was talking on the Senate floor about the burdensome cost of higher education. She was wearing a rose-colored blazer over a black top. The neckline sat low on her chest and had a subtle V-shape. The cleavage registered after only a quick glance. No scrunch-faced scrutiny was necessary. There wasn't an unseemly amount of cleavage showing, but there it was. Undeniable.

With Clinton, there was the sense that you were catching a surreptitious glimpse at something private. You were intruding — being a voyeur. Showing cleavage is a request to be engaged in a particular way. It doesn't necessarily mean that a woman is asking to be objectified, but it does suggest a certain confidence and physical ease. It means that a woman is content being perceived as a sexual person in addition to being seen as someone who is intelligent, authoritative, witty and whatever else might define her personality. It also means that she feels that all those other characteristics are so apparent and undeniable, that they will not be overshadowed.

Hillary Clinton's Tentative Dip Into New Neckline Territory [WaPo]

Previously: Paris Hilton's Early Release

She digs deep: Not only does she interview her own (former, of course, A.K. doesn't go in for that sort of thing anymore) plastic surgeon, but she scores a quote from Men's Health editor and giant male tit Dave Zinczenko. (Now we're in our sweet spot.) While some worry that this expensive procedure (it can cost up to ten grand to dehooterize a plump young man) may be overperformed on those who are still enduring puberty, others have happier anecdotes:

Dr. Robert Kotler, a plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills, Calif., said that his nephew, who is now in his 20s, had breast reduction surgery when he was a teenager.

"My nephew wouldn't take his shirt off in public," Dr. Kotler said. "He wouldn't go to the beach, which in California is a pretty big deal.

"In the past, doctors said, 'Oh, he'll grow out of it.' He decided not to grow out of it, but to have the procedure." The result was astonishing, Dr. Kotler said.

"Here was the shyest, most introverted kid you could ever meet," he said. "And now, well, he's the polar opposite of the shy kid. Guess what he does now? He's a Hollywood agent."

A Sense of Anxiety a Shirt Won't Cover [NYT]

Self-made force of nature Arianna Huffington was in Toronto on Monday night... publicizing her latest book, On Becoming Fearless. She is best known for her online news and opinion site, the Huffington Post. Co-hosts of the fest were Dominion Institute's Rudyard Griffiths; National Post gossip extraordinaire Shinan Govani; Rachel Sklar, a Huffington Post editor and friend of Ms. Huffington's... The Greek-born, Cambridge-educated, power-vibing Ms. Huffington gave a little speech in which she lamented the fact she was not carrying a handbag and had received so many business cards from people that she had been forced to stuff them into her bra. Noting her friend Ms. Sklar is a D-cup, Ms. Huffington then expressed the hope that the business cards had turned her into a D-cup from a B. Not your usual speech at a soirée, but clearly fearless.

Fear not a factor for Arianna [Globe & Mail]

• New York Social Diary will discover which (mostly aging) socialites have the best racks. (Ally Hilfiger! Where have you been?) [NYSD]
  
• A Smith Street bar isn't hospitable to neighborhood newcomers, and boy are they pissed. [Brooklyn Record]
  
• Andrew the Investment Banker's New York Post interview gets reevaluated: "Salary estimate: $190,000, including projected bonus (-2 for not lying)." [Leveraged Sellout]

You know, when I first heard about the shooting on TV in my hotel room at NAB, I turned to Mario and said "why does this always seem to happen this week in April?" Turns out, at least according to this blogger, that the beginning of spring marks "school shooting season". [sic] Do we, the media, have a responsibility to tone down coverage of these horrific events so as not to motivate copycats?

Top 5 [Amanda Congdon]

• "Has Ann Coulter gotten herself a pair of bolt-ons?—Sir or Madam -Check out the picture of formerly flat-as-a-board gaybasher Coulter with the gay Marine porn star on your blog this morning. Annie's sporting some serious gazoom. That's new. Is she stuffing, or has the Colt been hanging with the surgeons? Inquiring minds want to know. So do I. Redact the usual."
  
• "The View—Joely Fisher is guest-co-hosting and I CAN'T STOP STARING AT HER TITS. They're all bouncy and exposed."
  
• "Don't whore yourself out to FoxNews channel "Queer Guys with RedEye" show..Are you that desperate for attention?"

• "Tara Subkoff's stuff on ebay—The seller danetteneal on ebay is selling a load of Tara's stuff, including shoes from the Easy Spirit collection worn on the runway. One also gets an autograph of authenticity with their purchase. Why is she doing this? Is IoC not that lucrative? Is the Easy Spirit hookup
  not financial rewarding? The listings make it seem like she is just doing it to make money for herself and not for a charitable cause. Just had to pass this one on because it is so strange."
  
• "Re: Brooklynites Will Bring Their Comical Accents, Foul Habits To Delightful Hamptons Bus—Your Manfascinistic blabber is tiresome. Take the fist out of your asses."
  
• "I don't know if this is of any interest, but my friends and I have discovered that our NYC water... well, smells. Earlier this week my roommate and I detected an unknown odor in our bathroom. And despite a good cleaning, we couldn't figure out the origin of the scent. In any event, to my relief(?) I discovered this afternoon that several of our friends... in neighborhoods across the city, have also detected this smell."
  
• "Ombudsman—Since Coen OBVIOUSLY IMed/e-mailed to tell the Gawkereens that the Conde Nasties weberrific venture would be launching, shouldn't the fact that she was a Gawker editor be mentioned? Full disclosure, people. Full disclosure. You can't be a big media company now without obeying the rules. Tsk, tsk."
  
• I want to bring to light the DREADFUL job they are doing at Maxim online. For a website that, I am assuming, has somewhat of a large audience don't you think they would throw a little more money towards their photo shoots like in a studio instead of in their office where any dude that works there could walk by to take a leek? I still cannot get over the last post about Maxim Online you made with the girl in the stable with the huge round hump bump showing!"

  Previously: Eighty Is The New Forty

I am not subject to the 'rules' traditional journalists have to follow. Isn't that what new media is all about? Breaking the rules? Setting our own?

DuPont ads by ABC News' Congdon raise questions [LAT]