Sex talk! Chewing tobacco! Cholesterol drugs! Womb psychology! Weight coaching! Baby abdomen! Kiwi heart! Medication erection! And hearing loss, say what? Haha. It's your Tuesday Health Watch, where we watch your health—age-appropriately!
Stockholm's Karolinska Institute has concluded a new study about pregnant mothers and tobacco use and the results may shock you (no irony!). In snus-addled Sweden, using snuff/snus/dip is widely seen as less harmful than smoking, so it's a great habit for pregnant women who smoke to pick up, right? Perhaps not!…
The FDA is to be commended for consistently raising the vomit-bar when it comes to cigarette warnings. Next month, they're rolling out nine graphic new labels — collect them all! — featuring the most impressive-looking cancer lungs and sliced-open cadavers we've seen to date. Take that, Saw movie campaign! But your…
The bad news: just because those American Spirit cigarettes you're smoking are self-proclaimed "eco-friendly" does not mean that they won't turn your alveoli into tiny tar-filled tunnels of death. The worse news: cigarettes could be as bad for you as hot dogs. Damn.
Fish lead! Sperm coats! Bald hair! Tall cancer! Dissolving tobacco! Tortoise leg! Calorie counts! Lung damage! And the fatalistic approach to our own mortality! It's your Thursday Health Watch, where we watch your heath—soberly!
It's always oddly fascinating to read interviews in which Big Tobacco executives are spoken to like ordinary businessmen rather than like the inhuman monsters that they clearly are. Look, the heartless ogre can talk just like a normal human!
The FDA's main plan to getting Americans to give up the vile weed "tobacco" is to put increasingly nasty photos in increasingly prominent places on cigarette packs, until it simply becomes too socially awkward for anyone to carry around cigarettes. This will not work. But it's entertaining to watch the process!…
Are you partial to smoking hookahs, whitey? If you're not a college student you're like, "Fuck am I, a college student?" If you're a college student you're like "Totally, check mine out." Either way, you probably have cancer and herpes.
New York's War on Smoking has now won the battle of the public parks, sending thousands of grumpy nature-and-cigarette lovers into the packed, hazy city streets. In this shrinking smoke-friendly world, the next big thing is clear: "Snus." Really?
Pediatric socialists! E-cigarette regulation! Prostate testosterone! Antidepressant painkillers! Obese teens! Prescription take-backs! Young strokes! Natural allergies! And amazing acupuncture in Afghanistan! It's your Monday Health Watch, where we watch your health—with no regulation whatsoever!
Enjoy your unfettered right to spread emphysema to your fellow bar patrons while you can, America: a new CDC report *estimates* that by 2020, every state in our hazy union will have a New York-style law banning indoor smoking. Fuckers.
The U.S. government won huge lawsuit against the tobacco industry five years ago, based on the fact that the tobacco industry has been unconscionably killing Americans with blatant lies for 50 years. And the tobacco companies were like, "you got us! Okay, haha, you got us. We'll stop that."
The ongoing War on Smoking, having already eroded your inalienable right to smoke in various public locations of your choice, is taking things to a whole nother level: they are going to quite literally blacklist smokers, refusing to hire them and even mandating piss tests for tobacco, to ensure that smokers remain…
A new study has found that smoking a cigarette can cause genetic damage within minutes—so quickly it's "equivalent to injecting [pollutants] directly into the bloodstream." But, obviously, injecting terrible chemicals directly into your bloodstream won't make you cool.
A new FDA rule will force tobacco companies to disclose any changes they've made to their wicked products in the last four years. Hassle! Interference! Big government out of flavor country! But there is some great news for Newport smokers.
Louis Bantle, the former marketing director and chairman of U.S. Tobacco, died earlier this month at the age of 81 from emphysema and lung cancer. Bantle was most famous for convincing millions of teenagers to dip.
Since the gubmint came and taxed the hell out of everything from clove cigarettes to E-cigarettes, the last reasonable refuge for a gentleman who enjoys soothing nicotine is to roll his own cigs out of barely-taxed "pipe tobacco." Wait—revenuers!
The war on smoking is without end: they've already come for your clove cigarettes, and your flavored cigarettes, and your light cigarettes. Now, they're coming for your "e-cigarettes." Jesus, pretty soon we'll all be forced to smoke...cigarettes. [WSJ]
Philip Morris uses child labor on Kazakh tobacco farms. It's like a sundae of evil!
Smoking cigarettes may improve your memory, fine motor skills, alertness, and, obviously, looking-cool-ness. They will also give you cancer and make all your food taste like charcoal briquettes. But, again: You will improve your memory, and look totally cool. [Discovery]
