This week, two bodyguards who worked for Tom Brady and Gisele were convicted of attempted murder for firing at photographers who were trying to get shots of the couple's 2009 Costa Rican wedding.

Rumors continue to swirl that Gisele Bündchen has spent the last nine months in a state of utter pregnancy after the supermodel posted a Facebook update revealing she gave birth on Wednesday.

It's okay to not know a lot about football. There are many, many people who know close to nothing about football. For example, people who call it "American football." They've got no idea what's going on. But, even if you were taking a wild guess, you would probably assume that a guy who has previously won multiple…

I do not watch football. In fact, I have a deep-seated loathing for the very game of football that goes back to the cold Sundays I was forced to endure with my family at Foxboro Gillette Stadium. I hate football. But that doesn't mean there aren't some football players I want to bone.

Today we pointed at silly loser Tom Brady and laughed because he wears Uggs. What an idiot! Just kidding. Tom Brady is perfect. Tom Brady is so perfect, in fact, that he must have had a terrible past life. So speculated one commenter, at least.

I bet the whole first half of this ad isn't even Tom Brady's feet. I bet he was like "Look, I'll do your UGG ad for a billion dollars but no way am I actually putting a pair of UGGs on my feet, even though I am the world's biggest metrosexual. That's not even manly enough for me, and look at my haircut." Also Mos…

Move over Jen Aniston, we have a new queen of sad jiltedness. And sadness, thy name is Bridget Moynihan. Also today: Two TV powerhouses are welcoming new children into their lives, LeBron's mom is in trouble, and Kanye likes the ladies.

In case you didn't know, the Patriots beat the Jets last night. The Morning Joe gang covered the game , but spent a little too much time covering Tom Brady's post-game look. Start throwing in your bets for Brady's grooming time.

Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe pull the plug on their predatory credit card. Lindsay Lohan wants a restraining order against paparazzi. Tom Brady battles male pattern baldness. Brad Pitt's plague of poor fashion choices returns. Tuesday gossip is a lost cause.

Shia LaBeouf: feuding with Frankie Muniz. The Kardashians are moving to New York. Miley Cyrus wore short shorts to a 21+ club. Britney spears is sued by another maid. Saturday Gossip Roundup is having a flashback.

Tim Gunn calls Taylor Momsen "sad" and "pathetic." Jodie Foster avoids assault charges. Leonardo DiCaprio buys a pet that will live for 70 years. Chris Brown doesn't tip. Has Wednesday gossip gone too far, yet?

We were so busy gawking at Real Housewife Danielle Staub eating dinner with skater Johnny Weir in Chelsea last night that we missed the Costume Institute Gala Benefit. Luckily fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern was there in our stead.

Did you know that traders at the troubled investment bank are legendary health nuts? It's true! So could a fastfood eating contest between 10 mortgage traders at the firm have lead to the housing market collapse of 2007?

Nuclear Wintour may be blocking SuBo from Vogue—but her motive would be pure. Rachel Uchitel gets a job, Madonna gets a new beau. Is the "oral surgery" delaying Lil' Wayne's incarceration for his grill? Wednesday gossip cometh.

• Tinsley Mortimer's upcoming reality show has finished shooting. So, naturally, her "relationship" with former American Idol contestant Constantine Maroulis has come to an end, too. She's reportedly on the hunt for a new boyfriend, though, so if you know someone who'd a good match for the fame-obsessed socialite,…

• Lady Gaga collapsed in her dressing room last night just before she was set to perform at Purdue University. Paramedics were called and she reported she was "feeling dizzy and having trouble breathing," and the concert had to be canceled. But she's okay today and has since apologized to her "little monsters"…