Gopher tortoises, who enjoy being on land where they're able to maintain such basic functions as breathing and not dying, cannot swim. Which is why Florida would like to ask its residents to stop "helping" the tortoises find their way to the ocean's cold, watery depths.
There was once a time—before Facebook bought the Oculus Rift, before Zach Braff had a Kickstarter—when optimists hoped crowdfunding would change the world. It would democratize product development, change investing forever, and revolutionize the way we pay for tortoise penis surgeries. And now the dream is real.
After a recent visit from the BBC News Magazine crew, Jonathan the Seychelles tortoise of St. Helena Island seemed young and spry and happy for rejuvenated press attention, as he may die literally any day now. He is 182 years old.
Goldie has a spacious apartment in Prospect Park West, loves salad, and gets pushed around in a fancy baby stroller. Goldie is also a 51-year-old tortoise.
Nearly half of the critically endangered tortoises seized from smugglers in Thailand last month have died since the rescue, and the fate of the remaining tortoises is in the air.
Fish lead! Sperm coats! Bald hair! Tall cancer! Dissolving tobacco! Tortoise leg! Calorie counts! Lung damage! And the fatalistic approach to our own mortality! It's your Thursday Health Watch, where we watch your heath—soberly!
Did you know that baby tortoises climb rock walls? Have you ever seen so many baby tortoises together? Here they are, in a tank at a pet store.
