When schlockmeister Brett Ratner was named director of the Oscars, we groaned. When he named Eddie Murphy host, we groaned again. Now he's hired all new writers to help with him with the show. We can't stop groaning.

Noted Hollywood fauxteur Brett Ratner appeared on Attack of the Show to pimp his latest brain-smoothing studio confection, Tower Heist. After a comfortable amount of brown-nosing, host Kevin Pereira pointedly asked the director if rumors were true that a particularly unflattering passage in former co-host Olivia…

Universal's crazy Tower Heist plot will not come to fruition. Also today: A Disney princess makes progress with her very own grownup show, three of your least favorite shows will live a little longer, and Ben Stiller has lots of ghosts, which one you need?

Retro relic Eddie Murphy is going to host the Oscars, at least according to our bosom buddy Nikki Finke over at Deadline. Man, this is going to be worse than Forrest Gump winning Best Picture.

Here's a trailer for Tower Heist, the star-studded Brett Ratner (shudder) comedy about a bunch of apartment building employees who decide to rob the place's swindling, Bernie Madoff-esque richest tenant. Timely!

After all these years, we've finally done it. Also today: Tom Cruise has taken up with ghosts, Grace's best friend/property gets a new show, a blogger gets a TV show (ugh), and some movie casting.

Poor Ferris has finally snapped and taken to a life of crime. Also today: A show starring a beloved actress is canceled, another show will feature a non-beloved non-actress, and we fantasize about yet another TV show.