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New York, 4:37 PM
Sat Dec 5
40 posts in the last 24 hours

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    The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Perhaps Not Perhaps Not
    08/15/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    Actually, I think it mostly baits people like you and me who have to restrain ourselves from ranting about this d-bag.
     Reply
    Perhaps Not was starred Perhaps Not was unstarred
    Image of soonbanned soonbanned
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    This is bullshit - put up by Max himself or publicity department hoping that the ad will be the hook for a major news outlet to cover the movie's release.
     Reply
    soonbanned was starred soonbanned was unstarred
    Image of TheExperience TheExperience
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    So apparently, Tucker has to do his own PR for this hunk of shit?
     Reply
    freedc promoted this comment TheExperience was starred TheExperience was unstarred
    Image of Conchie Birdie Conchie Birdie
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    So she's always had this fantasy of catching various sexually transmitted diseases?
     Reply
    Conchie Birdie was starred Conchie Birdie was unstarred
    Image of AndPreciousLittleofThat AndPreciousLittleofThat
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    ***FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE***

    Healthcare and pharmaceutical giant Johnson & Johnson has announced a new extra-strength version of its Tucks Medicated Hemmorhoidal(TM) pads, to be released in Q4 of 2009.

    Called the "Tucker Max(TM)," this product is designed to be used with only the most inflammed assholes. If rubbed around the anus every two hours, the Tucker Max(TM) promises to deal with all your asshole issues.

    *CAUTION: Women who are or may be pregnant, or in possession of a vagina, should forgo handling of the Tucker Max(TM) pads. Touching the Tucker Max(TM) pads has been shown to increase incidence of mental retardation and physical abnormalities. Tucker Max(TM) pads should kept away from children at all times.
     Reply
    BrutallyHonestBabes (aka Mrs. Sarah.of.a.Lesser.Hobbit) promoted this comment AndPreciousLittleofThat was starred AndPreciousLittleofThat was unstarred
    Image of HypocriticalOath HypocriticalOath
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    If this is real, PLEASE let this couple be morbidly obese swingers with eczema. PLEASE.
     Reply
    DahlELama promoted this comment HypocriticalOath was starred HypocriticalOath was unstarred
    Image of hypocriteoath hypocriteoath
    08/14/09

    @HypocriticalOath: give me my name back. ha.
     Reply
    hypocriteoath was starred hypocriteoath was unstarred
    Image of dado dado
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    He wants the Max for the minimum it seems.
     Reply
    dado was starred dado was unstarred
    Image of City_Dater City_Dater
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    The last thing I would want as an engagment present is whatever social diseases Tucker Max is currently carrying, but then I'm not a stunned twat dating a loser with a man-crush on The King of Frat-Level Misogyny.

    Why are these people allowed to mate?
     Reply
    City_Dater was starred City_Dater was unstarred
    Image of OrneryBabe OrneryBabe
    08/14/09

    @City_Dater: If ever there was a reason for death panels . . .
     Reply
    Sargasm promoted this comment OrneryBabe was starred OrneryBabe was unstarred
    Image of DahlELama DahlELama
    08/14/09

    @City_Dater: I don't so much mind the mating as the lack of mandatory sterilization for such couples.
     Reply
    DahlELama was starred DahlELama was unstarred
    Image of PaisleyPajamas PaisleyPajamas
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    Two words: Yeah,riiiiight.

    If this is any indication of this film's marketing, it'll have a "straight-to-the-trashcan legacy" along with that Jessica Simpson stinker from 2 years ago.
     Reply
    PaisleyPajamas was starred PaisleyPajamas was unstarred
    Image of rockandhardPL rockandhardPL
    08/14/09

    In reply to The Depraved Sadness of a Tucker Max Fan
    This guy has a story about getting a blow job while pooping. (I was bored while interning one summer.) He is disgusting and his stories are just sad. It's like David Sedaris for the Stifler set. Gross.
     Reply
    rockandhardPL was starred rockandhardPL was unstarred
    Image of HypocriticalOath HypocriticalOath
    08/14/09

    @rockandhardPL: I appreciate where you were going with that, but please leave David Sedaris out of this. He's far too talented and awesome to ever ever have any link to Tucker "it puts the lotion in the basket" Max.
     Reply
    valet_of_the_dolls promoted this comment HypocriticalOath was starred HypocriticalOath was unstarred
    Image of OrneryBabe OrneryBabe
    08/14/09

    @rockandhardPL: I understand there is a term of art for that practice. And I can't express how deeply and profoundly ashamed I am that I know that.
     Reply
    mfnher promoted this comment Edited by OrneryBabe at 08/14/09 4:35 PM OrneryBabe was starred OrneryBabe was unstarred
    Image of mfnher mfnher
    08/14/09

    @OrneryBabe: Don't be ashamed. It's called a blumpkin. I heard a discussion about it on The Howard Stern Show about 10 years ago. *shivers*
     Reply
    mfnher was starred mfnher was unstarred
    Image of valet_of_the_dolls valet_of_the_dolls
    08/14/09

    @HypocriticalOath: Yes; some of David Sedaris' stories about his brother - aka "The Rooster" - can be pretty vulgar, but there's a humanity there that Tucker Max never approaches.
     Reply
    valet_of_the_dolls was starred valet_of_the_dolls was unstarred
    Image of Pope John Peeps II Pope John Peeps II
    08/14/09

    @HypocriticalOath: Eh. David Sedaris is okay, but to be honest he's one of those writers who doesn't live up to his own hype. Which is a big shame. So I like David Sedaris, but hate David Sedaris fans, who always end up being really overbearing ("WHAT? You don't like SEDARIS? BLA BLA BITCH BITCH"). And I actually have this weird feeling that David Sedaris himself probably agrees with me.
     Reply
    Pope John Peeps II was starred Pope John Peeps II was unstarred
    Image of Liberace Liberace
    08/15/09

    @Pope John Peeps II: i'm not david sedaris, but i agree with you.
     Reply
    Liberace was starred Liberace was unstarred
    Image of VoxPopuli VoxPopuli
    03/15/09

    In reply to Real Person Lauren Conrad in Real Love Affair with Real Wrestler The Miz.
    Actually, the third sentence in the Paltrow item seems more money shot than pay off to me.
     Reply
    VoxPopuli was starred VoxPopuli was unstarred
    Image of bluebears bluebears
    03/15/09

    In reply to Real Person Lauren Conrad in Real Love Affair with Real Wrestler The Miz.
    Apparently the GOOP gym sets you back 4500 to join.
     Reply
    bluebears was starred bluebears was unstarred
    Image of Understater Understater
    03/15/09

    @bluebears: There's also a pretention prerequisite.
     Reply
    Understater was starred Understater was unstarred
    Image of iplaudius iplaudius
    03/15/09

    In reply to Real Person Lauren Conrad in Real Love Affair with Real Wrestler The Miz.
    ... Third, the money shot.
     Reply
    iplaudius was starred iplaudius was unstarred
    Image of uninspired uninspired
    03/15/09

    In reply to Real Person Lauren Conrad in Real Love Affair with Real Wrestler The Miz.
    When I woke up this morning, I thought "What could I read about someone that would make me lose respect of them as a person?"


    This did it...I have now lost all respect for The Miz.

     Reply
    uninspired was starred uninspired was unstarred
    Image of SarahHeartburn SarahHeartburn
    03/15/09

    In reply to Real Person Lauren Conrad in Real Love Affair with Real Wrestler The Miz.
    I have an imaginary job and an imaginary boyfriend and do I get a writeup in the Star? No fair.
     Reply
    SarahHeartburn was starred SarahHeartburn was unstarred
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