We'll bet Tony Hawk taught you to "ride his halfpipe," Kevin Rose. But did he also teach to adjust his riser?

Yahoo's Marco van Hylckama Vlieg gave himself an impromptu performance review.

No matter what Levi Johnston tried to do with his tongue, Air America's Verena von Pfetten could not hate him.

Podcaster Scott Simpson wouldn't put it past Richard Branson. Neither would we.

Animal obsessive Susan Orlean saw a bald eagle and, better still, it did not try and kill her or drop dead under her lethal gaze!

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Steve Krakauer of Mediaite marveled that someone spelled the name of his website wrong. We marvel when anyone manages to spell it right.

UPDATE: The original version of this post mis-spelled Steve Krakauer's name.

The New Yorker's Susan Orlean announced her marriage to Mashable's Pete Cashmore, who will presumably elevate her above her past work as a part-time farmhand.

This is why TheFrisky's Jessica Wakeman can't have nice things.

Tila Tequila welcomes a conversation with your child, however prurient.

Paris Hilton is just fulfilling her moral obligation to entertain you, people. One does not question life advice from Marilyn Monroe. Especially when everything turned out so well for her.

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Joel Madden, the Good Charlotte vocalist, has already been eclipsed by his infant son.

Franklin Kramer refused to tell the Atlantic anything about his interview to be America's top cyber-spook. So he's definitely qualified for the job in one regard!

Our dear departed nigh editor doesn't think this Mexico City circus deserves to even be mentioned in the same breath as Entebbe. Now that was a hostage situation.

TechCrunch's Sarah Lacy is worried she's turning into some sort of flake! Hard to imagine.

Not only does "conservative" columnist Amanda Carpenter shop at Whole Foods, she also totes an Apple laptop. See you at the Birkenstock store, Amanda!

Susan Orlean would like you to know that a certain book party is going to be significantly less awesome.

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Wonderwall editor Alex Blagg can't bring himself to just put the DVD in the mail, already. You can get it back, Alex! It's like the library. Or at least that's what we tell ourselves.

Online videographer Molly McAleer is feeling child abusey again!

The Onion's Joe Randazzo officially wins the heated Twitter competition to crack the funniest joke about the death of Dominick Dunne.

Wired portrayed Craig Newmark as a stubborn oddball, so the Craigslist founder took that image and ran with it. Well played.

Susan Orlean passed along the Good News about the resurrection of the late Julia Child.

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Music journalist Touré was just trying to say Halle Berry would pinch anyone writing about her. OK, well, we know who our next blog post is going to be about.

Hunch's Caterina Fake found a slightly politer way to say "I don't have time for your bullshit."

First we found out Susan Orlean had a RAID array in her laptop, now we learn she has a terabyte hard drive on order. Maybe the New Yorker writer should be throwing some stories over to Wired?

Google literally saved journalism! It was only one story by one writer (Rob Pegoraro) at one newspaper (Washington Post), sure, but you have to start somewhere.

The Washington Post's Chris Cillizza isn't ashamed of how he puts the "Hyper" in "The Fix."

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Susan Orlean is what you might call an extremely high-maintenance writer. Even by New Yorker standards.

Another day on Twitter means another uncomfortable revelation, for Perez Hilton.

Technologizer's Harry McCracken got sort of Zen about losing all his work. Except for the theism.

Politico's Ari Melber is way, way too busy to watch himself on national television, so he lives it to his many fans on Twitter.

The Washington Post's Ezra Klein got tired of hearing himself talk, to say nothing of the person he was interviewing.

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Slate's Jack Shafer now has people wondering whether he is, literally, humorless. It's either that or he's a bad joke-teller.

If crazy New Yorker cat lady Susan Orlean has an actual RAID array on her laptop, we're turning in our geek cards immediately.

This is why you should never agree to let the writer Touré ask you a hypothetical question.

CNN's Ed Henry can't get anywhere near Notre Dame without mentioning, preferably to a national audience, how the university rejected him once, long ago.

CNET"s Natali Del Conte kinda liked being coerced into going to spin class.

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The Twitterati were discerning customers today.

Gizmodo associate editor Adam Frucci's outgoing voice mail message is about to get really interesting.

AFP's Olivier Knox stumbled onto a fascinating interview.

Gakwer contributor Melissa Gira Grant wrote up a gadget review, on spec.

The New Yorker's Susan Orlean doesn't see Mark Sanford shooting the breeze with, say, Eliot Spitzer; the adulterous politician would apparently run with a more southern crowd.

When it comes to conference proliferation, Air America's Ana Marie Cox really does hate freedom.

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The New Yorker's Susan Orlean wasn't about to let social pressure keep her from blogging about suicide

Salon's Glenn Greenwald pulled his punches with regard to the White House Press Corps, as usual.

The Daily Show's Tim Carvell was not impressed with the Times' sales pitch.

David Carr found himself easily distracted from his work for the Times.

But his colleague Patrick LaForge seemed to relish his new job: Assuring New Yorkers of various things that will not, in fact, kill them.

Washington Post dork Chris Cillizza admitted it.

CNET Newser Caroline McCarthy did not have to see a man about a horse.

Revision3 CEO Jim Louderback attempted to rent a car from a shoe store.

New Yorker Twitter controversialist Susan Orlean complained about an inanimate object, for a change.

Wired research editor Joanna Pearlstein rapped her job applicants' knuckles with a Twitter-shaped ruler.

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Internet microcelebrity Julia Allison gazed into the abyss.

Rich Barton, CEO of real-estate startup Zillow, let his iPhone app go to his head.

VH1 pop-culture commentator John Aboud sartorialized.

New Yorker writer Susan Orlean finally turned into a crazy cat lady, as we'd all kind of expected.

MSNBC anchor Tamron Hall feigned objectivity.

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SF Appeal editrix Eve Batey triumphed over musical shame.

Fox Chicago anchor Nancy Loo conducted consumer food-safety research.

Vain, pompous, self-aggrandizing Technology Review editor Jason Pontin couldn't choose just one adjective.

New Yorker writer Susan Orlean had an insight about the likes of Pontin.

By mid-afternoon, Air America radio hostess Ana Marie Cox had once again turned her thoughts to booze.

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Ann Curry of the Today Show accused Matt Lauer of being on drugs.

New Yorker writer Susan Orlean had a drink.

Technology Review fauxmosexual-in-chief Jason Pontin kept up the appearance of working.

Gawker alumnus Alex Balk learned something new.

AllThingsD blogger Peter Kafka tried to keep the music industry afloat.

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Susan Orlean of the New Yorker deigned to contemplate Facebook's redesign.

BusinessWeek's Jon Fine caught up on year-old Viacom trivia. (Yes, Viacom CEO Philippe Dauman's son works at Google. Duh.)

Washington Times Web columnist Amanda Carpenter wasted time on Twitter to announce she was not wasting time on Twitter.

Former Village Voice writer Tricia Romano began drinking early.

AFP correspondent Olivier Knox confessed to a mancrush on Wired editor Adam Rogers.

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Preternaturally hunky Curbed editor Ben Leventhal, ordered by ex-girlfriend Julia Allison to suggest a dinner spot, told her to Google the keywords "sugar daddy restaurants."


ABC newsman George Stephanopoulos felt compelled to clarify after reporting that his White House lunch with the president included "leeks and pot."

Spy cofounder Kurt Andersen's job was amazing today and yours wasn't.

New Yorker writer Susan Orlean caught the flu.

Funnyman John Hodgman announced his hate of the word "meh," and stirred up a fuss among the obstinantly nonchalant.