Humans invented weapons in part to equalize the physical differences between us. That’s perfectly understandable. But does your weapon have to be a gun? Chill out. Jesus.

A new survey of the American public shows that we hold our government in raw contempt for its uselessness and depravity, while at the same time wishing for that government to be more involved in all aspects of our lives.

A public meeting about building a new mosque in Spotsylvania County, Virginia degenerated into two men shouting down a Muslim engineer, yelling “Every one of you are terrorists.” Frankly, American Muslims would be safer if they were all heavily armed.

John Kasich enjoys a reputation as perhaps the most mainstream and down-to-earth Republican presidential candidate. He will cannily use this reputation to create a new U.S. Government Judeo-Christian Propaganda Agency—with beams.

Thanks to Jon Meacham’s new biography of George H.W. Bush, we learned today that the elder Bush referred to his 1988 Democratic opponent, Michael Dukakis, as “midget nerd.” Is no one immune from vicious, accurate two-word epithets?

After patriotism and religion, “attacking the media” is the most popular refuge of the scoundrel.

Cranial bee sting victim Donald Trump is a leading presidential candidate, despite the fact that he is clearly a stupid, racist clown. Can Donald Trump say anything too stupid to dissuade his own backers?

As long as people believe that Donald Trump built himself up from nothing, does it really matter that he was in fact born rich?

A new Gallup poll finds that only 40% of Americans have even a “fair amount” of trust in the media—an all-time low since polling began in the 1990s. Well, guess what?

The American intelligentsia is excited about a new book with a shocking and previously unheard thesis: black people do not like crime in their neighborhoods. Does this revolutionary idea change everything we thought we knew?

According to a new poll, 72%(!) of Americans “think their country isn’t as great as it once was.” Really? When was America greater?

As you are no doubt aware, Southern butter wholesaler Waffle House just served its one billionth waffle.

Hello, Donald Trump supporters. Donald Trump believes that you are very fucking dumb. And you are proving him correct.

If there is anyone able to understand the vast and ever-changing cultural diversity of this sprawling nation of ours, it is elderly white Reaganite Peggy Noonan, who once met a Mexican. Now, mi amigos, she has met a Dominican as well.

Joseph Stiglitz, a Nobel Prize-winning economist, is one of the world’s most influential thinkers in the battle against economic inequality. He’s trying hard to remain optimistic. But it ain’t easy.

The United States of America has a Communist Party. John Bachtell is its national chairman. We spoke to him about American politics, the mistakes of the Soviets, and communism’s “branding problem.”

Americans tend to think of our Constitution as a hallowed source of wisdom that should be tampered with only in the most extreme circumstances. But what if it’s really just old—and dumb?

It has become increasingly accepted to regard long-term solitary confinement of prisoners as torture. A new report from a psychologist who interviewed prisoners in long-term isolation adds to the bracing literature about how our prison system routinely destroys humans.

STOP. You there, with the American cheese—yes, you, the American. Hold it right there.

“Millennials,” a demographic group defined by a slavish devotion to “keeping it real” by purchasing the correct consumer products, are now old enough to be “out there” in the world, “doing their thing.” Instead, they are living at home.