The White Student Suing to Overthrow Affirmative Action Was Too Dumb to Get Into Her Chosen College

Life is tough for white people in America. A few hundred years of presumed superiority have left many of them psychologically unable to deal with failure, trapped in a cycle of victimhood where their own shortcomings can only be understood as evidence of persecution against them. So we have Abigail Fisher, 23 years…
Identities of Theater Shooting Victims Released (UPDATED)
As families of the Aurora shooting victims have been notified, some of the victims' names and stories have been released.
Debt Collectors Have Feelings, Too
Few people are more reviled in the over-leveraged United States than debt collectors. They'll talk all kinds of shit to you on the phone about credit card bills, or student loans that you one day decided to stop paying (but eventually started paying again to clear your guilty conscience and to be a good person), sure,…
Wyclef Jean 'Grazed' by Bullet in Haiti, Released from Hospital
Gawker's favorite New Jersey humanitarian, Wyclef Jean, was shot in the hand at a political rally for Haitian presidential candidate, musician Michel Martelly last night. But he's okay! According to Wyclef's spokesperson, "He was shot in the hand last night. He was released from the hospital. He's fine now. It…
Dick Cheney Will Never Apologize to That Old Man He Shot
Many (four) years ago, we Americans had a vice president, Dick Cheney, who shot an old man in the face. On a hunting trip. And today that victim, Harry Whittington, is profiled in the newspaper! How's he doing?
'Allahu Akbar!': The Wingnut Right Has the Jihad Nugget They've Been Hoping For
The Associated Press is reporting that, according to Ft. Hood's commander, witnesses to yesterday's massacre say Maj. Nidal Hasan was shouting "God is great" in Arabic as he was firing on his fellow soldiers.
Bernie Madoff's Affair Proves Ruth's Innocence!
A lady named Sheryl Weinstein—who helped a charity sink $40 million into Bernie Madoff's funds—is writing a book about her (sordid?) affair with Bernie. The big winner here: Ruth Madoff.
The Recession's Real Victims: White Guys
The Way We Live Now: As victims. Who really got hurt by this recession? Everyone thinks "The Poors," or "Small Business." Wrong. Spare a moment to sympathize with the real victims. Like white males. And ExxonMobil. And toilets!
Victims Would Like All of Ruth Madoff's Money, Thanks
Ruth Madoff gave up everything in exchange for a new lease on life and $2.5 million. Now a representative of her husband's victims would like that $2.5 million back. Along with another $42.5 million.
The Three Stages of Madoff Victimhood
Bernie Madoff's been sentenced to die in prison. Now, all those victimized by him have found peace. Just kidding! They're all in anguish. Seriously, we're worried about them. The victims are dealing with their rage in three distinct ways:
Ten Lamentations of a TARP Wife
Luckily for you, the wife of the "CEO of one of the biggest TARP recipients" has unwisely chosen to write an anonymous diatribe about the hardships of life as a "TARP wife." Class rage ahead:
Did Madoff Take Millions From 50 Cent?
Did Bernie Madoff fuck around and rip off often-shot rapper 50 Cent for millions? Yes, if you believe an anonymous snitch who talked to a website that 50 Cent hates!
Formerly Rich Lady Is Our New Favorite Blogger
Alexandra Penney was a wealthy UES sex book author and editor who lost everything in the Bernie Madoff swindle. The only winners: us, because she's now the most delightfully un-self-aware ex-rich blogger evah!
The Only Madoff Victims You'll Recognize (or Care About) So Far
The $50 billion Bernie Madoff Ponzi scheme claimed lots of big-name victims. Now, a few days into the investigation, the Hollywood connections are coming out. Fun!
No One Gets Out Clean
Talk about a reversal of fortunes! Instead of reblogging the New York Post's content, today Gothamist had its content lifted by the Post. The paper ran a Gothamist photoshopped picture of Eliot Spitzer without crediting the site. You may think, How sad, New York Post, stealing from a web site. Or how sad, Gothamist,…
Lindsay Lohan: Unwitting Wearer Of Mystery Coke-Pants?
The truth-seekers of Entertainment Tonight, virtually alone in their principled quest to reject the anti-Lohan propaganda force-fed to the media by the Santa Monica Police Department, has started asking the uncomfortable questions about What Really Happened following the fateful high-speed chase of early Monday…
Gilmore Girls Vs. The Wildfire
Overshadowed by uplifting stories about the heroic efforts of celebrity Scientologists to save their neighbors from the rapidly spreading flames of the Griffith Park wildfire are the heart-sickening tales of the blaze's true victims: We speak, of course, of Gilmore Girls fans, who, having just learned that their…
