Operation Uphold Democracy: Haiti, 1994-95.

Mexican feds are on a roll. Just weeks after announcing they'd caught El Chango, Jesús Aguilar, a leader the Zetas cartel, was arrested and paraded in front of press. He's suspected in the killing of a U.S. drug agent. [NYT]

Bath salts: Their steady emergence as the designer drug du moment is well-documented. Their powerfully hallucinatory effects on the human brain, legendary. And now, their peddlers have been busted.

Freedom fries and foreign beer for everyone: in 2010—for the first time ever, according to some dubious industry association that may or may not be trustworthy—the USA consumed more wine than the hated French. Sure, big party.

Enjoy your unfettered right to spread emphysema to your fellow bar patrons while you can, America: a new CDC report *estimates* that by 2020, every state in our hazy union will have a New York-style law banning indoor smoking. Fuckers.

There are two sides to the Civil War, as CNN has pointed out to us, so it makes sense that a poll commissioned by the network finds that 23 percent of Americans sympathize more with the Confederacy ("the bad guys"). And, let's be honest: Slightly less that one-quarter is actually pretty good, as questions like this…

On tonight's Factor, brand new birther Donald Trump chatted with Bill O'Reilly about Iraq, Iran, Libya, and that dirty socialist Barack Obama. Trump's solution for the Middle East? 1) Stay there, 2) hoard the oil, 3) ???????, 4) profit!

The Telegraph's Rob Crilly, reporting from northern Libya, has found a crashed U.S. F-15E fighter jet after following "a dodgy sounding tip." The BBC got confirmation from U.S. Africom that the plane went down last night. One crew member has been rescued, while the other is "in the process of recovery," an Africom…

Over the weekend, the Unites States—along with France and England—began military attacks on Libya in an attempt to remove murderous dictator Muammar el-Qaddafi from power. Tonight, The Daily Show returned, and Jon Stewart questioned the coalition's actions.

Operation Odyssey Dawn continues! Freedom bombs continue to rain down upon Libya today, while coalition nations try to stave off political divisions back home. A majority of Americans, however, support the creation of a no-fly zone. Rep. Dennis Kucinich would like to impeach Barack Obama. And what does "Odyssey Dawn"…

The Times of London is reporting that Gen. David Petraeus will leave his spot as the head of the U.S. Afghan Command at the end of the year, not that anyone blames him. Petraeus replaced Gen. Stanley McChrystal in the difficult, thankless job in July of 2010 after McChrystal was fired over a Rolling Stone article; a…

Martin Luther King Jr. hated the Vietnam War and spent the last year of his life vociferously arguing against it. But according to the Pentagon's top lawyer, King would've liked America's current wars! How does he know? Well, he doesn't.

JibJab's become known for their funny/relevant "Year in Review" videos, so I'm pleased to announce that 2010's version—featuring puppets of President Obama and Vice President Biden singing a lamentation of the sh*tty year that was—doesn't disappoint. Watch inside.

Secret-sharing website Wikileaks just released the largest leak of U.S. military documents ever, and it's like the oposite of Christmas. The 400,000 Iraq war documents details widespread torture by America's Iraqi allies, abuse the U.S. military largely ignored.

Seven months ago, then-Gen. Stanley McChrystal closed the fast food outlets at large U.S. military bases in Afghanistan due to 'space issues' and because they were contributing to an 'amusement park' atmosphere. They're coming back!

America's most charmingly corrupt congressman, Harlem Rep. Charlie Rangel, has once again introduced symbolic legislation to reinstate the draft. So then joining the army would be something everyone has to do. Sort of like paying your taxes. Eh, Rangel? Eh?

Eliot Hess is a former hippie and current PR firm owner. Terry Borg and Thomas Pienkos are both executives in the Trump Organization. They all live in the same co-op. And their childish, idiotic email war is now big news!

We were excited for the return of the Minutemen, the vigilantes who sat on lawn chairs and watch the border. But something seems to have gone wrong: The Minuteman Civil Defense Corps disbanded, right after they got everyone riled up.

Starbucks is ground zero for gun nuts now! Survivalists, modern-day militiamen, and muttering crazies all prefer Sbux-brand lattes! No longer will Starbucks be seen as a safe haven for liberal pussies! The shooting starts soon.