America's Future First Family, The Palins, are whiling away their time up in Wasilla, Alaska, as usual. Sarah's counting her speaking money; Bristol's counting her speaking money; and Todd—well, Todd's just there to intimidate the reporters.
Because Sarah and Bristol Palin are sharing their mass delusion about abstinence on Oprah, Levi couldn't let this opportunity go to waste to get in front of the camera himself. He's on The Insider tonight, and he's talkin' trash.
Sarah Palin may have invited her daughter's babydaddy to Thanksgiving dinner, but the future Playgirl centerfold will not be passing the yams with the Palins. He turned down her offer, saying she's "full of it."
Not only is Levi Johnston our hero for taking his penis out for all the world to admire, but also because he's standing up to The Man. Now he's suing for custody rights of his son, Tripp.
The PR push for Johnston's article in Vanity Fair started yesterday and people are already hating America's babydaddy and rooting for Sarah Palin. But her reality-television-turned-politics spectacle was getting stale and nothing reinvigorates an aging soap like a good rivalry.
Raed Jarrar just toured Americaland, where he stopped off in Alaska to visit with Sarah Palin. His impressions? He said that her voice was very "annoying in person". Yep, that sounds about right!
The heartwrenching saga of the Wasilla Hillbillies, the most recent installment of which features the dramatic break-up of Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston, cries out for a reality show. It could be on VH1.
In this week's Star: hilarious and slightly depressing "gossip" from Levi Johnston's bitchy, MySpace-y sister Mercede! Do you care about the petty dramas of unwed teen parents in far-off Alaska?
Finally, Wasilla resident Sarah Palin has taken a concrete step towards "telling her story" without the distorting filter of the mainland media and mousy comedians. She's looking for a big fat book deal!
Hey, it's true! Mercede Johnston really did leave that MySpace message saying Sarah Palin considers her "white trash" just because her bro Levi knocked up Bristol and her mom Sherry is a pill-popper.
Please let this be true. According to a barely literate MySpace message, Sarah Palin is snubbing the family of Levi Johnston, the jock who knocked up Bristol, because they're "white trash." (Not that we'd disagree.)
The mom of Levi Johnston—first daughter candidate Bristol Palin's uncomfortable jock boyfriend—has been arrested on drug charges. Law and order Republicans now support Obama! Because this sounds vaguely like a meth lab:
