Ice longa, vita brevis.

A swarm of unruly and confused honeybees took over a Topshop on Victoria Street in London yesterday afternoon, presumably looking for spring sales or to reassert the ferocity of Wu-Tang Clan. Beekeepers came to divert the bees elsewhere, away from retail.

[Workers repair one of Big Ben's four faces. Watch out, worker! Image via Getty.]

Newly-released billionaire massage aficionado and Ron Burkle pal Jeffrey Epstein is officially a registered sex offender in Florida. His brand new "Sexual Offender/ Predator Flyer" also includes a map to his house! Smirk less, Jeffrey. [Cityfile]

Great White Sharks are exactly like Jeffrey Dahmer except they have fins and swim in the ocean and use their jagged gaping jaws as weapons, says a new report from scientists who were never heard from again.

Vaguely annoying Brit writer and Top Chef judge Toby Young was hit by a car while riding his bike in London last week, but he's going to be okay. Here, his busted head. [Toby's blog]

The multi-tentacled jellyfish menace is loose in New York waters and nothing you can do will stop it! Quickly, swim, swim for shore, damn you! The floating blobs of fury are breeding as we speak. A swimmer died during the New York triathlon last weekend, and while doctors say there's no evidence a jellyfish sting was…

An interesting intellectual exercise: in the absence of new content, how can you keep churning out thousands of words on "Sex And The City" in order to exploit every last bit of misguided interest in the HBO series about four fabulous friends in New York before the movie comes out, giving you another free faux-news…

In an episode that was simultaneously poignant, noble, and hilariously out of touch, old New York Times reporter David Dunlap—who is always on the lookout for "illegal marketing campaigns"— says he "sensed a story on the evening of the 14th, when I came across two or three young men stapling posters for a new…