Gawker
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webtards
McCain And Obama Reps Hold Worst Presidential Debate Ever On Twitter
Members of the staffs of John McCain and Barack Obama are holding an official debate on Twitter, presumably to attract the Tech-savvy Urban Early Adopter Influencer Creatives who have been almost entirely committed to Barack Obama since before the primaries. Mike Nelson (an "outside adviser" to Obama) and Liz Mair (the RNC online communications director) are fielding questions about their candidates with 140-character answers. But as one blogger said, "Conducting a debate via Twitter seems like a depressing acknowledgment that the soundbite is now the fundamental unit of American political discourse." CNN reported on the stunt in the clip shown below (though they get the dates wrong and say moderator Ana Marie Cox started Gawker, when in fact she edited the D.C. blog Wonkette). More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by IHateNewYork: I am voting for Darth Vader/Alex Trebek, so who cares about these two assholes. more » | Other threads
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barack obama
The Five Internet Jokes That Will Make Obama Win
The Internet can change elections! Just not through Meetup and Friendster like some people thought. Okay, these five pictorial jokes about Barack Obama and John McCain won't be entirely responsible for Obama's imminent November victory. They're just mobilizing the base! Because Influential Thought Leaders don't join "One Million Strong For Obama On Facebook," but they do link to political jokes on their Tumblr blogs. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by Jeezabub: I love the right wingers who say, "if Obama wins we're TOTALLY SCREWED, I'm going to LEAVE THE COUNTRY..." Like... more » | Other threads
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facebook
Easiest Blog Book Deal Ever
An anonymous blogger is posting Facebook statuses along with comically slightly disguised photos of the people who wrote them. It has the potential to be a carnival of derision, except the blog has no comment form. Good thing we do.
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By Nick DouglasComment by VoxPopuli: Isabele has boundary issues. 4:34 p.m. more » | Other threads
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hoax
Who's Trying To Convince Everyone That Cell Phones Pop Popcorn?
A new handful of YouTube videos supposedly show cell phones popping popcorn. The method: Surround kernels with a few cell phones and call the phones. When they ring, the kernels pop. The videos have gotten a couple million combined views, and they've seemingly convinced many commenters to fear phones, despite the several obvious signs that they're fake. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by GroovyBrent: Wired has the answer (possibly) and it turns out to be pretty clever! [blog.wired.com] more » | Other threads
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crossovers
The Unlikely Confluence of Julia Allison's Techboys in Esquire
Vimeo's Jakob Lodwick, the ex-man of both Star talking head Julia Allison and her BFF Mary's little sister, 18-year-old soap star Leven Rambin, is in Esquire this month. He's finally fulfilled his dream of becoming a model! (They featured boys of the web, who got to keep their clothes on.) Meanwhile, Iminlikewithyou's Charles Forman, pictured on the left, has finally fulfilled his dream of dating Julia Allison. And now they're pictured in the same spread—awkward! Click to enlarge. [via AlleyInsider]
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By SheilaComment by hhpeterson13: @SybilDisobedience: Heh, heh, Butthead, you said Lodwick! That sounds dirty. Heh! Beavis indeed. more » | Other threads
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things we actually like
YouTube's Funniest Bedroom Guitarist Is Back And Releasing An Album
Bo Burnham is not only part of the much-fanfared generation of young YouTube stars making music in their bedrooms, he's also as sharp as a budding Tom Lehrer with the dirtiness of Stephen Lynch. Bo dropped his first new video since his popular punny rap from eight months ago, "Bo Fo' Sho'." The new song "New Math" (shown below) is astoundingly, satisfyingly dorky. One line goes, "Whats domain, domain, range / A kid with too much in his pants." 'Cause it's XXY, get it? Hermaphrodites! More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by procrastinator, esq.: @skahammer: Please, take her off our hands. She's about as much of an asset to the gay community as Jeffrey... more » | Other threads
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webtards
Idiot Internet Commenters Instantly Vindicate Essay About Idiot Internet Commenters
"It doesn't matter at all what I write about," Ken Layne wrote at AOL News this weekend, "because the comments will be an insane half-literate string of racist nonsense and startling ignorance that has nothing to do with the subject of this post." The post got twelve pages of comments. Guess whether the Wonkette editor was right! Here's a sample of the best comments. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by UnstableMabel: @SarahHeartburn: Speaking of reading, I'm a tad worried about myself. I initially read 'brain sturgeon'. What's all that about? Does... 1 Responses | Other threads
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how things work
Why The Internet Ruins Humor: A Sophisticated Theory
"All Internet humor is entirely reliant on you recognizing that thing you know, and nothing more." An article at Something Awful, the astute comedy site devoted to critiquing the Internet, explains why the Internet ruins all humor. Below, what would have happened if Seinfeld aired today. (In short, it would have annoyed you to death.) More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by Lycosidae: @Nick Douglas: And those really, really underground segments of advertisers and TV viewers. (WHERE'S THE BEEF?) more » | Other threads
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lolcats
LOLCats Is Now In Banksy-Land
In San Francisco, the land where Internet memes are incarnate, a LOLcat photo has become a giant mural (note to self: are there small murals? investigate). Big photo below. [Laughing Squid] More » -
webtards
Twelve People Actually Worth Following On Twitter
Maybe you didn't like the list of powerful people you're supposed to follow on Twitter. Neither did I! Because powerful people don't Twitter. But witty people do! Such as the man who wrote, "How much do you have to pay a cop to forget he saw a bloodstained Tickle Me Elmo stuffed with opium? Wikipedia is like zero help over here." More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by Nick Douglas: @rex: Okay, since you just IMed me about this comment, I concede I didn't care how you came off. You... more » | Other threads
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webtards
Quiz: Are You An Online Jackass?
Everyone has a little online jackass in them; some of us add people on Facebook too soon, some of us beg for votes on Digg, some make white whines on Twitter. But these behaviors can lead to more annoying habits, like constantly bugging people to blog you, getting hooked on Yelp, or writing drug metaphors. Thank god online jackassery can be summed up in a condescending online quiz. Take it below! Maybe you're a Carrie. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by James Del: @Phyllis Nefler: Well that comment right there scored you a bonus 50 points for knowing the name of someone who... more » | Other threads
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viral video
How Many Viral Ads Have Copied The One That Got Three Million Views?
Apparently there's only one script for viral ads on the Internet: Guy does small trick with product, guy does bigger trick with product, guy's friends tell camera, each other, bystanders and guy how awesome he is. There's always music in the background and you can always tell it's fake. I just explained how the same ad agency that did this for Ray-Ban last year just did it for Levi's; apparently Coors hired someone for a cut-rate version in this terribly staged YouTube "viral video" of Coors can tricks, shown below (along with a cute little parody). More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by EllieCal: looks like the coors crew has a new video, and this time the crowd shows real distaste. Note the... more » | Other threads
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viral video
How Levi's Jeans Duped The Internet With Their New Secret Ad
My friends are blogging about this viral video of guys doing backflips into their jeans. So neat! So shareable! So worth the million views the three-day-old clip already earned! But I could tell instantly (and I have no idea why no one else did) that this was a stealth ad — because it's a direct copy of a stealth ad that got over 3 million views last year. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by Nick Douglas: @nyoung79: Yeah, I didn't go into it but watch the video posted by @JmoneyGangsta. more » | Other threads
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super deluxe
Super Deluxe Becomes The Internet's Arrested Development
It's over! The most consistently funny comedy site on the Internet is getting folded into AdultSwim.com. Turner is shutting down Super Deluxe and laying off most of its staff, according to paidContent.org. Now the original web content will get stuck with clips from Family Guy and Adult Swim's increasingly weird-without-payoff lineup. The good news: The guy below gets a TV deal. More » -
publishing
Penguin Books Proves The Entire Internet Can't Write A Novel
Before inviting the web to create a collaborative novel using a wiki in 2007, Jeremy Ettinghausen asked, "Can a community write a novel?" The answer is yes but a terrible one! A year later the Penguin publisher told researchers at De Montfort University (Penguin's partner in the project), "It's the best thing I've ever done...but I would never do it again." Which means "The book was awful but I'm not going to insult the 1500 people who wrote it for me." Of course no one expected the novel to be any good — the excerpt below is about as terrible as one would guess. That's why this was a great project for Penguin. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by FelixCulver: Is this passage referring to Cthulu? Do not rouse the dark lord from his slumber. His thirst is not easily slaked... more » | Other threads
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webtards
Kanye West is Sorry He Said That Thing (Sorta)
Yesterday, Kanye West got all screechy and babyish about a luke warm Entertainment Weekly review. Today, he has blogger's remorse. He says on his website, "Unfortunately for certain media outlets, you will never be able 2 'Michael Jackson' me. That means 2 make it seem like everything I do is so weird or out of place... they always try 2 make it seem like everything is about my ego! That joke is getting old." More »
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Comment by djdavetrouble: He is even a whiny bitch in his songs, though... I can't wait until 50 cent or someone slaps him, ala... more » | Other threads
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things we actually like
Viralcom, The Production Company Behind Every YouTube Hit
The premise: A major production company is behind all the classic viral videos like "Laughing baby." See behind the scenes of "Girls make out at party" and "Boy puts Mentos in sister's Coke." (My favorite scenes are with the writers, who churn out one-line scripts but now I'm spoiling all the jokes.) The bittersweet irony behind this video keeps the momentum up, even if a few jokes fall flat. And it'll surely spark a dozen discussions of the future of online video in boring "new media" business blogs. See the non-businesslike clip below. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by cockfightbarmitzvah: @Nick Douglas: Au contraire doucheaire. College Humor are the Dan Cook of internet videos. more » | Other threads
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webtards
Eleven Ways The Internet Can Kill You
While I was pulling an all-nighter this weekend watching YouTube, my stomach started to growl even though I'd had like a whole thing of goldfish crackers and a bottle of Kahlua, and as I popped a diet pill and scratched a couple scabs off my forearm, I had a vision of the eleven ways the Internet could kill you. (Please don't sue: Of course not all the sites and practices listed below are directly responsible for any deaths. But if you're already at risk, you might just get yourself killed when you use them.)
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By Nick DouglasComment by raincoaster: See, if you sub in gin for Kahlua you never have these problems. Trust. more » | Other threads
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webtards
Crazy Unsexed Housewife Of New York YouTubes Angry Tell-All Video
The wife of a Broadway exec (she's 25 years younger than him, about as old as his daughter) tours the flat he's kicking her out of and calls his office to ask about the porn, condoms and Viagra she found despite never having sex with him. Tricia Walsh-Smith, soon-to-be-ex-wife of Philip Smith, chokes up while she tells how he's divorcing her with "no grounds." This is like the lovechild of that old soap star with the embarrassing house tour and those girls who striptease on Megarotic.com and talk dirty to their ex-boyfriends. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by DoctorEcks: Jeezus Fucking CHRIST!!...THAT CHRIS COCKER GETS AROUND! That is him, isn't it? CON DOMZ more » | Other threads
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camgirls
The Silent Staring Japanese Girl Is Ugly, Not Japanese
Well ugly is such a harsh word, so judge for yourself in the videos below: first, one of the videos I talked about from the silent (but occasionally Japanese-speaking) cute camgirl known as Magibon. Then a clip of her on a Japanese talk show, where she needed an English translator. Without the flattering bird's eye angle of her webcam, her face is long and plain; her teeth are terribly crooked. There's more information in this juvenile wiki article. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by Shinyfluff: What is wrong with you? She is a child. more » | Other threads
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webtards
"McCain Girls" A Prank, Mercifully
The three women who dubbed themselves the "McCain Girls" and made a series of YouTube videos on behalf of the Republican presidential candidate were working for 23/6, the "humor" site from IAC/Huffington Post, and their entire campaign was a joke. To hear 23/6 President Sarah Bernard tell it, the first video was supposed to be an obvious parody of the Obama Girl videos, but no one understood that. Then 23/6 decided to keep the "prank" going as long as possible, which turned out to be one month. McCain watched the video repeatedly, he told Fox News in the clip after the jump, but his description of it as "very entertaining" hints that he knew something was fishy. More »
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By Ryan TateComment by thecomicscomic: + Watch videoI know one of the guys who created the McCain Girls, and I have interviewed him at length... more » | Other threads
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webtards
Little Scotty Mouthbreather in Disturbing Paris BFF Bid
Icky Blue States Lose thing Little Scotty Mouthbreather is using his pull at icky American Apparel in an icky attempt to be cast in the upcoming reality TV nightmare Paris Hilton's My New BFF. A mass email sent by the leg-warmer marketeers yesterday reads, "American Apparel's heiress, Jonny Makeup is searching for a new BFF. And as luck would have it, so is a certain Miss Paris Hilton. Let's bring these kids together so they can search for boys, toys and trouble on the streets of LA." Oh, and, in case you want to go ahead and skip brunch, here's his retarded video. -
youtube
A YouTuber Explains How He Made It In Hollywood
One of YouTube's few deserving runaway hits, Brandon Hardesty got popular first for his skit "Strange Faces And Noises I Can Make III." Then he started re-enacting famous movie scenes. Sounds boring! Except Brandon is so energetic, so funny, and so faithful to the original that you feel like you're watching the movie again. (My favorites were The Big Lebowski and There Will Be Blood.) Now Brandon's making it in Hollywood, as he explains in the video below. Fun to hear a young talent talk about his acting coach, his manager, and how fucking great his life is. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by raincoaster: Is he related to Sally Hardesty from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies? Awesome! more » | Other threads
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bloggers
Top 10 Tips For Writing A Top 10 List
The "Best Week Ever" blog outlines the method that made it the most popular online source for top 10 lists since College Humor, Cracked.com, The Onion, McSweeney's, and Something Awful. I have the short version below. [Best Week Ever] More » -
webtards
The Jim Cramer Of Weather Reports
If I shot sixty-five videos a day I'd probably want to scream too. Slate interviews Jim Kosek, loud jokey weather reporter for Accuweather.com, in the clip below. Maybe it's just because I grew up without a zany local weatherman, but I'm less annoyed than amused; I actually want Jim Kosek to give me my forecast. Look below, see if you like him. More » -
things we actually like
You Look Nice Today: A Journal Of Emotional Hygiene
The twee title belies this podcast's hearty tone (and the twee bits are like John Hodgman, not Dave Eggers). It's a new comedy show, hosted by three terribly clever guys who met on the Internet: "You Look Nice Today," starring Scott Simpson (editor at iTunes), Adam Lisagor (movie editor), and Merlin Mann (productivity expert/comedian). Topics include White Bill Cosby, the queen's royal watchers, and an ad slogan: "Secret: You can put it on your inner thigh." Listen to the mp3 or subscribe on iTunes.
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By Nick DouglasComment by crotchety: This is unrelated to the novel by Stanley Bing? more » | Other threads
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flash games
The Flash Game That Melted My Mind
It's called "Fruit Mystery," you feed zoo animals, and then you get a seizure. [Fruit Mystery]
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By Nick DouglasComment by VoxPopuli: But at least I learned that strateberries make turtles sick up their neccesaries. more » | Other threads
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wtf
Smooth Jazz 9/11 Slideshow
This time, this time, we've really found the craziest Internet crackpot. One minute into this slideshow of photos of the World Trade Center, images of the towers smoking on 9/11 pops up. But the smooth jazz playing over the whole video keeps going. Two hastily consulted New York Gawker writers were split on whether this terrible editing decision was horrifically-funny-awful or just plain awful-awful. And then we saw the user's second, altogether more bizarre (and thankfully disaster-photo-free) video. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by transgenic_mouse: Anyone here ever watch Staten Island public access TV? Back when I lived there in '06, they would have show... more » | Other threads
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things we actually like
The Midwest Teen Sex Show
It's a sex ed show with wit. I'm gonna say more but it's only filler; just watch their episode on oral sex below. Only the audio is NSFW. The Midwest Teen Sex Show is actually shot in the Midwest and actually targeted to teens, only it's so devoid of condescension that you might forget it's more than comedy. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by She_of_the_Socks: This is funny! But what's a Midwest? more » | Other threads
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webtards
The Inventors Of The Rickroll Respond To The Joke's Popularization
Today all the "featured video" links on YouTube's front page actually link to this video of Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up," and thus the Internet's weakest prank (OMG I sent you a blank music video instead of what you wanted) dies its thousandth death. I checked 4chan, birthplace of the Rickroll, to see how they were handling the popular acceptance of their joke. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by ✈The Late Pufflehuff✈: But... Dick? Oh crap. more » | Other threads
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webtards
Soulja Boy Mocks The Entire Idea Of Music In Real-Time
For every 500,000 views he gets, Soulja Boy is putting up a freestyle on YouTube. Sample lyrics by the creator of "Crank Dat" and "Yahhh": "I don't give a fuck I'm fresh, what you damn think?" I can see the history of music melting, Old Dirty Bastard is rolling blunts in his grave, and yet my ass is involuntarily bouncing. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by yourfriendandneighbor: Nothing is sadder than his flunkees shout HA! in the background. more » | Other threads
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boing boing
Guy Who Distracts You Forty Times A Day Explains How Calm His Life Is
Boing Boing, the most popular blog for all other blogs to steal fun stories from, ruled Internet conversation about weird distracting things until sites like Digg came along. Now that it's no longer the first place to find a meme, the site is even cooler (which I blame on the authors' dedication to posting whatever the hell they want). One of those four authors, Cory Doctorow, has started blogging at an IBM-sponsored blog about how he, like, never needs to check his e-mail and doesn't even read the Internet any more. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by BullfightsOnAcid: @soybomb: You make underdeveloped techno-fairy-tale drivel sound like a bad thing. See you on Saturday. more » | Other threads
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webtards
Rick Astley Most Likeable Singer With Most Annoying Song
Singer Rick Astley finally commented on the stupidest prank on the Internet, Rickrolling. In an L.A. Times interview he says the song is lightweight, the trend is cute, and he's old and uncool. The man is determined to avoid any backlash whatsoever, as if he might be blamed for a million instances of minor annoyance. He even looks pretty cute lately. Rick Astley, pretty cool guy or just making up for an undeserved career?
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By Nick DouglasComment by SuperBien: @SuperBien: Rats. Should've included "Becks loves Posh" to that list . . . more » | Other threads
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webtards
Midget Hillary Clinton Dances, Flashes Some Thigh, And Basically Tops Every Political Video Ever
I...I'm pretty sure this is a guy. A Chilean comedian dressed as Hillary Clinton shot the most disturbing political video since yesterday's "It's Raining McCain." The long-armed little man (god I don't even know what term is offensive any more) also does a decent Amy Winehouse. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by chuchobaby: WTF is right. It's like a train wreck -- can't watch||must watch! more » | Other threads
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webtards
I'm Not Addicted To The Internet, I Just Need It Inside Me
All the bloggers this weekend were all "Oh no Internet addiction is an illness!" Because an editorialist in the American Journal of Psychiatry says excessive Internet use should be classified as a mental disorder. But that's missing the point. The problem isn't that people overuse the Internet. The problem is that the Internet is still trapped in boxes and not embedded in our brains. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by britneyspearstears: Thanks for that photo, I needed a good laugh. more » | Other threads
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webtards
Well Now I'm Voting For John McCain
Not only are these ladies almost a year late for the "Obama Girl" craze, they're so deliciously terrible and so enthusiastic that I laughed until, for the second time ever, YouTube made me cry. The backing track sounds like it's from a Game Boy. The women are, well, they don't look like Obama Girl (although one looks like Fat Jenna from 30 Rock). One of them has pants that disappear on greenscreen. And in the final chorus it's literally raining McCain. This video is the metric equivalent of ten thousand nights of karaoke. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by riceball246: Another post-curve video. Better production quality though. Gay 4 Obama more » | Other threads
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webtards
Celeb Vanity Site Changing Way Americans Ignore News
Arianna Huffington came to this internet with little more than a URL, a dream and a whole lot of connections. Now, according to Nielsen online, the Huffington Post has surpassed the Drudge Report in traffic. What perfect timing for a New Yorker essay on the state of online journalism and how she's changing the rules. More » -
things we actually like
That One Sweded Film That Was Pretty Funny
As you could have guessed, nearly all the "sweded" films made during the marketing of Be Kind Rewind (and several knockoff contests) were boring. One parody managed to crack good jokes, and though it drags on in the third act, so does the film, so that's okay. It's Terminator 2, the low-budget version. (My favorite line is "Live with me if you want to come.") More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by marvolvox: @fiveinchtaint: Not really. It's surely not worth a trip to a theatre, but if you are hung over and don't... more » | Other threads
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how things work
How To Be A Japanese Girl
A YouTuber (no, it's not the same one who gets a million views whenever she stares at the camera, yes I'm sure they all look alike but bear with me) explains how to max out "cute Japanese girl" playability. Turns out it's even simpler than bashing your head against a wall screaming "why doesn't anyone watch my carefully made skits?" Just play Japanese music, flash a peace sign, wave, and stare. The most popular girls don't talk, just like in the good old days! More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by KiKiRiKi: @SoftBeadySuedeShoes: Not like she'd be able to understand it! more » | Other threads
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things we actually like
The Deserving Winners Of The YouTube Awards
This year's YouTube awards were better allotted than the Oscars, with one winner that actually made me cry. As with feature films, they're better than the biggest box office hits. Apparently the trick to finding good YouTube clips is to wait a year. Five particularly worthy clips are below. More »
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By Nick DouglasComment by TruPhan: Yup, welled up on that last one. But more importantly, did anyone else notice that one minute into Human... more » | Other threads
webtards
New York, 4:38 PM
Thu Jul 16
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