Gawker
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fitness
Extreme Dieting Prolongs Your Miserable Life, Say Donut-Munching Scientists
After torturing rhesus monkeys for decades with extremely low-calorie diets, scientists have finally proven that eating less can help primates (you) live longer. And the United States of America has proven that eating more kills you quick. Related: Donut Wars!! More »
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Comment by Private Hangnail: Subjects 14, 36, 67, and 91, all on the standard diet, were dismembered and consumed by Subject 2, currently on... 2 Responses | Other threads
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science
College Kids All Racist In Their Own Special Ways
College: where drunk kids are guinea pigs for social science. The funnest college-kid studies involve race, because they make everyone uncomfortable! Now comes a new study of interracial college roommates that proves we're all terrible. A racial breakdown:
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Comment by Pareene: oh, god, the studies are from Indiana and Ohio State? What a shock that white kids from shitholes who've never... 12 Responses | Other threads
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health
Stop Smoking and Kill Yourself
You should stop smoking, doctors say. Here, we have medications to help you stop, doctors say. But oh—these medications could make you kill yourself. What the hell is science good for? More »
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Comment by ChillbearLatrigue: As long as it gets the job done, who cares how someone ends their addiction to cigarettes. Its a disgusting... 17 Responses | Other threads
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science
Die Young and Pretty or Old and Fat?
In the cave man days, everyone wanted to be fat, because fat represented valuable stored calories. Now nobody wants to be fat, because it makes you die faster, and you'll never be a sexxx icon. What changed? Science knows! More »
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Comment by Ohcaptainmycaptain: Can I go with TB? With diabetes they keep slicing off parts of your body. 9 Responses | Other threads
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Behind you!
Just Give Up: Sharks Are Serial Killers
Great White Sharks are exactly like Jeffrey Dahmer except they have fins and swim in the ocean and use their jagged gaping jaws as weapons, says a new report from scientists who were never heard from again. More »
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Comment by Nice Beaver: Sometimes that shark he looks right into ya. Right into your eyes. And, you know, the thing about a shark:... 6 Responses | Other threads
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That's what they all say
You Drink Moderately For Your Health. Ha.
You, the sweaty awkward one: you look like the type that desperately justifies your daily drinking. Science says it's good for your heart or your mind or something, right? Wrong! Lush! More » -
science
It Is Impossible to Convince the Bitters That Barack Obama Is Not a Muslim
10% of Americans still believe Barack Obama is a Muslim. And here is the fun bit: a new study suggests that attempts to correct that misperception only reinforce it. More »
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By PareeneComment by MisterHippity: This is really Obama's fault. He could lay these rumors to rest once and for all if he'd just publicly... 12 Responses | Other threads
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Shut Up, Twitter
Science Confirms: Twitter Dominated by Self-Obsessed Dudes
Harvard has looked at the data and two studies have reached an unavoidable conclusion: Self-absorbed loudmouth guys have overrun Twitter like no other place on the internet. You probably figured. But now there are numbers. More »
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By Ryan TateComment by blogissuchanuglyword: Apropos of not much, but I can't believe people actually Twitter. Like, that they sit there and think "Ohhh, shit... 6 Responses | Other threads
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Sexy science
'Abuse Me,' Plead Scientists
Horndog scientists are studying sexual sex fantasies of men and women and they've come to some startling conclusions: We all want to be dominated like dirty animals. But only if you want us for our sexiness! More »
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Comment by Paul.B.Dodd: Seriously, I'm a scientist. I do research for a living and I'm extremely offended that you're referring to psychologists... 10 Responses | Other threads
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health
Coffee, Cigarettes, Alcohol: A Balanced Diet
Good news: Coffee's not bad for you! Bad news: Unless you smoke when you drink it. But, good news: if you're an alcoholic you must drink coffee! More »
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Comment by zibby: No need to note that Popov is "discount" vodka. That stuff is notorious. It makes Georgi look like Ketel One. 6 Responses | Other threads
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science
Shrewd Teens Drink to Fall Down
The authorities tried to help kids drink responsibly by putting the exact alcohol content right there on the bottle, but—to their dismay—kids just use this valuable information to get more fucked up: More »
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Comment by BullfightsOnAcid: Just drink a Zima. It will totally make you giggly. 5 Responses | Other threads
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trendwatch
Hippie Biological Warfare
If it makes you feel any better, the new trend is hippies breeding new strains of deadly viruses in their closets: More »
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Comment by kimsama: Bacteriophage = virus E. Coli = bacteria Algae = algae Just so you know, only one of those is a "virus" and since... 2 Responses | Other threads
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science
Jeff Bezos Wants Your Baby's Brains
What will Amazon.com CEO Jeff Bezos do next, after launching his grand Kindle swindle on the newspapers? He's aiming to get inside your offspring's heads! More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by Mutley: I really can't tell if Bezos is giving or receiving in that photo. 2 Responses | Other threads
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man vs. machine
A Computer That Answers Questions! What Will They Think of Next?
Jeopardy champ Ken Jennings is challenging IBM's Watson supercomputer. It's a replay of Big Blue's chess contest against grand master Garry Kasparov, but on an Alex Trebek-run battlefield. More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by Aaron Altman: Yeah, but I bet "Watson" can't name six foods that begin with the letter "Q". 6 Responses | Other threads
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dumb
The Wrigley Science Institute (as in makers-of-Doublemint) announced that chewing gum makes you smarter.
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facts
More Alien Proof
A former Apollo astronaut says that aliens have visited Earth! He's just a well-known lone nut, you say? Well what about this NEW PLANET they found right next door, hmmm? More »
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Comment by EastEndguy: Everything is exactly the same there as here. Except that they have Page Five, and it's reporting that a horse... 1 Responses | Other threads
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Shut up, brain
Twitter's Brain API Was Inevitable
A University of Wisconsin researcher posted a 23-character message to Twitter using his brain — instead of the random muscle spams that have been customary on the microblogging service until now. Breakthrough!
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By Ryan TateComment by blimpyboy: That's kind of cool but what I'm waiting for is the penis API. Lil' Blimpy would be posting every... 4 Responses | Other threads
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23andme
Mrs. Google's Science Project Not So Scientific, Say Actual Scientists
23andMe, the Google-backed genetic-testing startup run by Anne Wojcicki, the wife of Google cofounder Sergey Brin, has everyone from Rupert Murdoch on down spitting into test tubes at parties. Too bad it's useless! More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by propertius: She looks more game than testy. 5 Responses | Other threads
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Shut Up, Twitter
Science Proves the Obvious: Twitter Users Are Evil and Wrong
Is Twitter amoral? Scientists have probed the issue, but the answer is obvious: Of course it is. It's a blank slate, by design — empty of values except for the cultish worship of the now. More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by metoometoo: CEO Ev Williams has countered these critics by saying Twitter is all in how you use it. It is an... 9 Responses | Other threads
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theories
Big Psychology Nerd Talks 'Snark'
Only boorish, unqualified loudmouths like bloggers and David Denby have weighed in on the world's most grating question, "What's with all this snark?" Until now! An actual psychologist has a theory. More »
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Comment by JosiePye: Ah, for the good old days, when I was jung and people were kind to one another... 6 Responses | Other threads
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dude
Weed Cures Cancer!
Tetrahydrocannabinol has been demonstrated to induce human glioma cell death through stimulation of autophagy! That means that weed totally cures cancer. Dude. More »
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Comment by ChillbearLatrigue: Is anyone seriously against the legitimate medicinal use of cannabis? We have people turning into zombies because of prescription oxycotyn... 18 Responses | Other threads
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science
'Burning Vagina' Only Downside to Awesome Penis Spray
Men who lasted less than a minute in bed have to endure a whole rigamarole of counseling, anti-depressants, fix the underlying problem yadda yadda whatever. Not anymore, because now there's a miracle numbing spray. More »
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By Ryan TateComment by ginger rant: I appreciate the feminist sentiment in the post, Ryan. I just don't get how it works with the photo. 13 Responses | Other threads
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the real issues
Senators Demand to Know Whether Government Employees Can Access Asianbabes.com
Two of your US Senators—2% of the total—are using their time in office to get to the bottom of all these National Science Foundation employees looking at porn, at work. Cam sex justice!' More »
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Comment by El Matardillo: Can't make the cam2cam feature work, eh? Sounds like he's been blinded by science. 6 Responses | Other threads
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advertising
Science: You Love Commercials
Pop culture scientists are now telling us that commercials actually make television more enjoyable. "The findings are simultaneously implausible and empirically coherent." That's what I'm saying! But we have detected some wackiness in this study: More »
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Comment by TheHonJudgeSmails: To corroborate: I find that my erections are longer lasting and more enjoyable if I take an occasional break from... 4 Responses | Other threads
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language
Words to Kill So 'Dirty' May Live
Academics remove themselves to ivory towers to puzzle over hard problems. But their isolation sometimes leads to hilarious results — like the discovery that "bad" and "dirty" are endangered linguistic species. More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by BookishLookish: All new tech-related words are twee and irksome. I miss hearing people use the word "shall," and "terrific" has been misused... 14 Responses | Other threads
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science
Drunk Girls Will Get Cancer
Well I reckon if they found out that jerking off gives men cancer, then it's only fair that they also found out that drinking gives women cancer. Thanks science! More »
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Comment by BookishLookish: Chardonnay is disgusting and anyone who drinks it deserves what they get. That's why I stick to bourbon. And ... 10 Responses | Other threads
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science
The Web Will Kill Us All, Unless We Take a Walk in the Park
Will Facebook give us cancer? Not if we browse it on an iPhone in the park! Such is the pseudoscience of health and the Internet. More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by Lymed: Just make sure you are talking to your friends and family while you are blogging during your hike...and eat blueberries... 2 Responses | Other threads
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science
Rich are Rude, Poor are Nice. But Still Poor.
Have you always thought that rich people are jerks? Perhaps that's because of the fact that science has just proved: Rich people are jerks. More »
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Comment by Ken Keziah: I've been bartending for a group of wealth managers & their clients at my second job (see I'm poor) this... 8 Responses | Other threads
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facts
Scientology Proves: Psychiatrists Caused 9/11
Why do Scientologists hate psychiatry so much? Who cares, it just makes them look amusingly craz(ier). In this clip from a cheapo Scientology TV show, a real Scientology doctor proves that psychiatry caused 9/11!: More » -
science of love
Foreplay: Unnecessary
Will the wondrous advances of science never cease? Ladies and gentlemen, a new study has proven that foreplay is totally unnecessary. Just dive right in! More »
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Comment by Mount_Prion: I am here to officially announce that, despite this survey, I refuse to stop eating pussy. 25 Responses | Other threads
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psychology
New York Times Subtly Bans Creativity
Colors aren't just for looking at. They're also for making your brain do things! Science has produced a breakthrough new study about how colors can make reporters stop screwing around and get to work: More »
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Comment by par20pinspot: I like their stock market graph staircase in the background 4 Responses | Other threads
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science corner
If You Have No Friends, Blame Your Parents
The way the world works, you are either cool and have 600 Facebook friends, or you are worthless and only have 40. But it's not your fault. Science says it's genetic. More »
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Comment by saythatscool: What if I have lots of friends but no star? What should I make of that? 9 Responses | Other threads
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science
Study: Jerking Off Now Will Kill You Later
Will scientists ever stop destroying our lives? We're sorry to report, men, that according to a new study, masturbating throughout your 20s and 30s will totally give you cancer. More » -
drugs
You Can Still Afford to Take Your Dream Trip
Economy got you down? Can't afford your precious mushrooms or acid tabs anymore? Well, fear not. The keys to your next hallucinogenic high are right in front of you. In coffee! And ping-pong balls. More »
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Comment by TedSez: The Ganzfeld experiment is also supposed to give you ESP. Although, if you've ever seen William Hurt in Altered States,... 13 Responses | Other threads
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love is dead
Drugs Are The New Anti-Love
Love scientists, fresh off the discoveries that Axe Body Spray and liquor will help you get laid, have helpfully confirmed that "love" is simply an annoying chemical reaction. Which can now be blocked! More »
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Comment by SwissMister: Where's the one that makes you super-horny? Have they discovered that one yet? Also: Voles bond? Really? I mean, c'mon. They... 12 Responses | Other threads
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sexiness
Axe Proven To Help Dumb Men Attract Mates
A landmark actual new scientific study has discovered that, yes, Axe Body Spray can help you get laid. But opening your stupid mouth could render the sickly juvenile aphrodisiac worthless. More »
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Comment by Uncle_Billy_Slumming: My AXE smells like month old pee. It does seem to have an effect on the ladies though. 18 Responses | Other threads
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from the lab
Science Report: Coke Makes You Annoying, Alcohol Makes You Horny
Thankfully scientists, finished with curing widespread disease and prolonging life, have turned to important studies. Two new endeavors prove two shocking facts: snorting coke makes people annoying, and drunk people like to fuck. More »
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Comment by smecktacular: People with 2-4 sexual partners? Where in the bible belt was this conducted? 7 Responses | Other threads
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vice
OMG! Are You Worried About Third-Hand Smoke?
We love to ingest smoke the old-fashioned way: straight into our lungs. Second-hand smoke will do in a pinch. But third-hand smoke? What kind of smoking hysteria is that?
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By SheilaComment by drunkexpatwriter: Man, there is such a fucking industry dedicated to scaring the crap out of people about smoking. And I'm so... 23 Responses | Other threads
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laptop chat
Obama Takes Strong Stance in Belief in Gravity, Al Gore
With two wars, a looming depression and a nation defined by anxiety and fear, Obama has a pretty tough job. But there is one easy part: he can remind us he's not George Bush.
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Comment by Private Hangnail: The only scientist I listen to is my Bible. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go vomit intestinal... 6 Responses | Other threads
what we need more of is science
New York, 11:43 AM
Sat Jul 11
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