Bad news for vegans and chicken-eaters alike: On Thursday, Whole Foods announced it had accidentally switched the labels for its chicken salad and "chick'n" salad in stores in the Northeast.

Whole Foods, spurred on by recent concerns and scandals about what is actually inside of the things we eat, has decided to start labeling foods that have been genetically modified by 2018. While it's unclear whether this will lead to a larger practice of this type of labeling in the industry, Whole Foods Executive…

Whole Foods, the grocery store for pretentious upper class urbanites and those who aspire to be same, wants to make it clear to the world that it is not a grocery store for pretentious upper class urbanites. Not at all. What gave you that idea?

Given Whole Foods' status as "one of America's best places to work (for herpes-union haters)," you might be surprised to hear that a couple years ago the company fired a whistle blower. And not just any old whistle blower, either, but a "poop leak whistle blower": a sewage sniffer-outer, a foe of feces fraud.

Hundreds of riot police booted Occupy Oakland from their camp early this morning, arresting about 25 people. Occupy Oakland protesters are now homeless, like their Portland counterparts. This is what happens when you fuck with Whole Foods in Northern California.

A handful of anarchists besieged an Oakland Whole Foods a few minutes ago, after false rumors circulated that managers had threatened employees with termination if they participated in today's Occupy Oakland general strike. Whole Foods hasn't seen such strife since the Great Kombucha Shortage of 2010!

Yuppie haven Whole Foods has yanked reality star Bethenny Frankel's $120 million concoction, the Skinnygirl Margarita, from the shelves because one of the ingredients might cause cancer. And now Bethenny is on the attack.

"David Wasserman, of the nonpartisan Cook Political Report, recently calculated that 89 percent of Whole Foods stores... were in counties carried by Obama in 2008," reports Sheryl Gay Stolberg. Not only that! Whole Foods and Obama are also both Muslim.

Faux hippy Wal-Mart and parking lot realness headquarters Whole Foods is happy to sell you 11 billion varieties of hummus, but don't get the wrong idea, wingnuts: Whole Foods is just as scared of Muslims as you! Really!

As Marge Simpson once put it, "We can't afford to shop in any store that has a philosophy." And the same might easily be said of anyone considering working at one, too. Welcome back to the Whole Foods Experience, where Whole Foods workers past and present—newly liberated by one Canadian employee's explosive kiss-off…

Shortly after hitting send on his withering, now-legendary resignation letter, the former employee of a Toronto-area Whole Foods flew to South Korea to begin an exciting new career chapter, far, far away from sociopathic co-workers who walk into people. He has so far ignored our requests for comment—but you haven't!

Late Friday afternoon, an employee of the Whole Foods Market in Toronto sent this epic resignation letter to the entire company. It's an alternatingly amusing, enlightening, and occasionally infuriating read—but a good read, nonetheless.

First, Starbucks started serving up wine. Beer counters were installed in Duane Reades. Now, fellow New York City neighborhood gentrification staple Whole Foods is also installing bars inside its stores. What gives, nillas?

Thanks to places like Whole Foods and people like Dr. Oz, Bolivian children are at risk of malnutrition. Why? Because of America's sudden love affair with quinoa — that tasty little chenopod that most wrongly describe as a grain. The Times tells us why we should feel guilty for eating it:

Michael Gilliland, the founder of onetime Whole Foods rival Wild Oats, was arrested in Phoenix, Ariz. for allegedly "soliciting sex online from a girl who identified herself as a minor." According to police, Gilliland agreed to pay for sex with an underage girl (who, one presumes, was actually an FBI agent) and…

[Jessica Alba and Husband Cash Warren go Grocery Shopping at a Whole Foods in Brentwood, CA. Image via Splash]

Senator Chuck Schumer is looking out for Americans by lobbying for a ban on reusable grocery bags that contain high levels of lead because, "to add insult to injury, guess where these bags are made? China." Fearmongering... Schumer style. [NYP]

When you're in Whole Foods tomorrow to pick up your organic free-range sustainable humanely slaughtered coconut chicken skewers, you might see some people staring forlornly at an empty shelf. Why? The kombucha's gone! Oh, overpriced fermented tea. Where'd you go?

Attention foodiots! Stop snapping iPhone pictures of that grain-fed, humanely slaughtered, free-range veal burger and order up some genetically-modified super corn, because your whole cause is a scam and isn't helping anyone but Whole Foods. According to some, at least.