European celebrity chefs don't really command a lot of respect when you consider that their success depends almost entirely on employees they treat like galley slaves, paying them piss poor wages and denying health insurance and maternity leave as a matter of course, things they would never be allowed to do in the old country. It's a corrupt business built on exploiting women and undocumented immigrants for the benefit of rich, spoiled assholes.
Say, fellows, you don't suppose that this Melissa Spielberg woman is a relation of that Steven Spielberg johnny we've all heard so much about, do you? Why, Charmaine Blake must be even more famous than us New York rubes ever cottoned to! I'd best call my solicitor and have him set up an account with her - I hope she has some expensive options for us.
@TableNine: yes a shot for every time Charmaine's FULL name is used by this "dear friend" of hers, and a shot for every time we can picture Charmaine typing "My name is Charm..., (backspace, backspace, backspace) My name is Melissa Speilberg..."
@DrEngine: Then shotgun a beer for every John Ratzenberger and funnel grain alcohol when she misspells her own name and you're there. Just make sure you have the paramedics on speed dial.
Can we just make killing publicists legal? They have the ethics of lawyers and the education of televangelists. Enough already. Back to waitressing they go. Bye.
OK, let's entertain this retarded follow-up as if it weren't totally asinine for one moment. Why would anyone do this to Charmaine ? For a fake press release it's awfully positive. I mean, if someone was trying to fuck with Charmaine, why wouldn't they say something like "I'm sitting here with John Ratzenberger. I've been having wet farts all day and I sure hope he doesn't notice. Later on we're meeting up with George Wendt for a bit of light BDSM. Should I tell him I have chlamydia? Tee hee hee!", etc.
09/03/09
Like that time The Beatles hung out with Elvis Presley at his house in the hills. The mood was apparently quite awkward.
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09/02/09
Whew. That felt good.
09/02/09
07/02/09
Somewhere, Mandie Erickson is laughing evilly.
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Which isn't that different from not giving a rat's skull-fuck about their (already legendary) assigniation at an Applebee's in Torrance.
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