Brian, isn't this an opportunity for Gawker to send in an investigative journalist to find out if he is likes the guys? Who could take on that assignment? How about you?
@adiam7: Aww, I understand that it's difficult to accept it, but you'll be better off in the end. Just like when you take the one straight drama kid to prom, and cry when he gets drunk and makes out with that young, male debate coach who is chaperoning.
NO, Brian, NO. He is all we straights have. Do you understand how infrequently this sort of beautiful wanders into our camp? No, of course you don't. How could you? Well, the answer is never, Brian. Never. How dare you try to take this away from us?
He’s kinda hot, but I could never get with another Jewish guy. It’s against the Torah. There’s a little rhyme, see: when you do buttsecks, it must be a shegetz.
@VeinsLikeGardenHoses: Oh, yes, good call, hon. He dumped Kelly when she invited Ashley Dupre to sit in his front row at a show. And now Kelly is talkin' like a yenta after three cups of coffee!
@globalnomad: Fake tanner? Hair grease? Put your glasses on, Grandma. That is the natural sheen of a hot, swarthy male, "globalnomad." If you ever fucked outside your time zone, I wouldn't have to tell you that.
You're a dude, right? Not only do you not have eyes in your thick skull, but you do NOT have a vagina--and are not worthy of one.
Well. I didn't think people were created with orange splodges all over their face. Either he loves the foundation or the fake tanner or I'm blind. But I'm not white so maybe there is a sub-species of orange-skinned white people I've never seen and I have a vagina that has fucked a lotta people outside its originating time zone.
Objectively he's not repulsive, but he doesn't make my loins atwitter. Then again I have weird taste in men.
This fella stole my moves! Well, that is if by "small, intimate dinner parties" you mean "leaving sobbing messages on obviously turned off cell phones."
09/10/09
...and yes, you will wonder where your Ipod nano went.
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So Pope Peeps, I don't think he's that hot! And his coupled with his alleged sleaziness, my vagina just closed up for the day.
06/22/09
You're a dude, right? Not only do you not have eyes in your thick skull, but you do NOT have a vagina--and are not worthy of one.
06/22/09
Well. I didn't think people were created with orange splodges all over their face. Either he loves the foundation or the fake tanner or I'm blind. But I'm not white so maybe there is a sub-species of orange-skinned white people I've never seen and I have a vagina that has fucked a lotta people outside its originating time zone.
Objectively he's not repulsive, but he doesn't make my loins atwitter. Then again I have weird taste in men.
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06/22/09
I doubt they get much further than World 1-2 in Super Mario Bros.
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