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New York, 1:38 AM
Mon Nov 30
11 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #yourhealth more →

    Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts

    The 'Blatant Lies' School of Advertising

    Dutch Potheads Threatened by Anti-Tobacco Goons
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Tremonius Tremonius
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    Loved Grape Nuts. All I am I owe to Grape Nuts. You pour 'em into a hand grinder and when they're just-above-powder you dump it in a bag with some egg whites and seasonings and then your tofu burgers and they you fry it all on a grill outside in the park, with everybody smiling. No part of our diet down south ever had anything to do with metaste; if it was good, then it was good.


    'Course I never caught malaria, so maybe it worked?

     Reply
    Tremonius was starred Tremonius was unstarred
    Image of City_Dater City_Dater
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    Grape Nuts are fantastic to have in the house if you have a cat. Useful when you run out of kitty kibble, and kitty litter.
     Reply
    City_Dater was starred City_Dater was unstarred
    Image of Spirit Fingers Spirit Fingers
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    Seriously though, I've never been able to buy these cereals or look at anyone in the store with them in their shopping cart without thinking, "Yeah, uh, someone's having a little trouble with their BMs," as my Grammy would say. Why are we arguing what Grape Nuts claims to do but doesn't? Let's talk about what Grape Nuts and:


    1) Shredded Wheat


    2) Cracklin Oat Bran


    3) Fiber One


    4) Raisin Bran


    are really here to do? Stop playing coy with the world! They have one purpose and one purpose only.

     Reply
    Spirit Fingers was starred Spirit Fingers was unstarred
    Image of CaptainFantastic CaptainFantastic
    06/01/09

    @Spirit Fingers: Cracklin Oat Bran is delicious. It tastes like oatmeal cookies, dipped in milk.
     Reply
    CaptainFantastic was starred CaptainFantastic was unstarred
    Image of Spirit Fingers Spirit Fingers
    06/01/09

    @CaptainFantastic: If you sweeten and let sit in milk for about an hour, Shredded Wheat becomes Cream of Wheat, if that's your kind of thing.
     Reply
    Spirit Fingers was starred Spirit Fingers was unstarred
    Image of VoxPopuli VoxPopuli
    06/01/09

    @Spirit Fingers: That's why I go for Poopy Time cereal instead. They include a toy in each box.


     Reply
    VoxPopuli was starred VoxPopuli was unstarred
    Image of Spirit Fingers Spirit Fingers
    06/01/09

    @VoxPopuli: I'm scared to know if that's a real product.
     Reply
    Spirit Fingers was starred Spirit Fingers was unstarred
    Image of VoxPopuli VoxPopuli
    06/01/09

    @Spirit Fingers: No, it's a fake that was making its way around the interwebs, but I fear someday it will be a real thing.
     Reply
    VoxPopuli was starred VoxPopuli was unstarred
    Image of VoxPopuli VoxPopuli
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    I had a friend in college who swore by grape nuts and yogurt, but I've never tried them.


    I've always thought they were developed by a group of dentists who wanted to get some more work replacing knocked-out fillings and crowns because the sugary cereals weren't rotting the kids' teeth fast enough.

     Reply
    VoxPopuli was starred VoxPopuli was unstarred
    Image of PrincessKashmir PrincessKashmir
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    I never liked Grape Nuts until I had them in ice cream form. Sadly, it appears the only places that sell them are bait shops, petting zoos and I-talian shops in Maine.
     Reply
    PrincessKashmir was starred PrincessKashmir was unstarred
    Image of dado dado
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    Grape Nuts was the only cereal I was allowed to put honey on as a kid. Now I know why.
     Reply
    dado was starred dado was unstarred
    Image of misslinda misslinda
    06/01/09

    @dado: I've never tried honey on cereal, that sounds delicious! In summercamp, we weren't allowed to have sugared cereal, so we would take Cheerios and dump half a jar of sugar on top. Morons never took the sugar shakers off the tables.
     Reply
    misslinda was starred misslinda was unstarred
    Image of Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    I loved them as a kid. Bought them several times since in a nostalgic fog, eat one bowl each time then let it get stale. Maybe I'll just run out and buy one last box.
     Reply
    Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate was starred Zanzibar Buck-Buck McFate was unstarred
    Image of Wrapitup Wrapitup
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    Some poor guy somewhere wishes he took out a copyright on everyone's nickname for his miniature testicles.
     Reply
    Wrapitup was starred Wrapitup was unstarred
    Image of scroll_lock scroll_lock
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    I use them wadded up in some cheesecloth to strip the old finish off furniture.
     Reply
    scroll_lock was starred scroll_lock was unstarred
    Image of Sarcastro Sarcastro
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    Deez.
     Reply
    Sarcastro was starred Sarcastro was unstarred
    Image of scroll_lock scroll_lock
    06/01/09

    @Sarcastro: Big Nilla, the Thrilla Who Is Not From Manila!
     Reply
    scroll_lock was starred scroll_lock was unstarred
    Image of misslinda misslinda
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    I have never had a grape nut. Because my mother loved me and wanted me to grow up big and strong, she fed me the classics--Frosted Flakes, Sugar Smacks, Froot Loops, Apple Jacks, Boo Berries, Cocoa Puffs....
     Reply
    misslinda was starred misslinda was unstarred
    Image of scroll_lock scroll_lock
    06/01/09

    @misslinda: Sugar Smacks are the BEST. Also, Cocoa Krispies. MMMM
     Reply
    scroll_lock was starred scroll_lock was unstarred
    Image of BookishLookish BookishLookish
    06/01/09

    @scroll_lock: King Vitamin. Have breakfast with the king.


    /brainwashed 4evah!

     Reply
    BookishLookish was starred BookishLookish was unstarred
    Image of scroll_lock scroll_lock
    06/01/09

    @BookishLookish: That's one that I know I never, ever had - I'd have felt disloyal to Burger King.
     Reply
    scroll_lock was starred scroll_lock was unstarred
    Image of scroll_lock scroll_lock
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    After dozens of years shilling Grape Nuts to the olds, Euell Gibbons passed a boulder-sized stone and ex-parred.
     Reply
    scroll_lock was starred scroll_lock was unstarred
    Image of BadUncle BadUncle
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    I like the way they compact and adhere in sharp little wads beneath your gums.
     Reply
    BadUncle was starred BadUncle was unstarred
    Image of DennyCrane DennyCrane
    06/01/09

    @BadUncle: So they're the chewing tobacco of cereals?
     Reply
    DennyCrane was starred DennyCrane was unstarred
    Image of BadUncle BadUncle
    06/01/09

    @DennyCrane: Yes! and they make first users just as queasy.
     Reply
    BadUncle was starred BadUncle was unstarred
    Image of Pope John Peeps II Pope John Peeps II
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    wheat, barley, yeast, water


    That's odd, they have exactly the same components as Heidi Montag.

     Reply
    Pope John Peeps II was starred Pope John Peeps II was unstarred
    Image of BadUncle BadUncle
    06/01/09

    @Pope John Peeps II: i thought she was made of reconstituted cat food.
     Reply
    BadUncle was starred BadUncle was unstarred
    Image of Pope John Peeps II Pope John Peeps II
    06/01/09

    @BadUncle: THat's only her new tits. The rest of her: GRAPE NUTS.
     Reply
    Pope John Peeps II was starred Pope John Peeps II was unstarred
    Image of Lymed Lymed
    06/01/09

    In reply to Stupid Americans Eat Grape Nuts
    But grape nuts are great at creating traction when your care is stuck on ice and snow.
     Reply
    Lymed was starred Lymed was unstarred
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