"Obama, L'Chayim."

The wine was flowing liberally. None of them needed that shot. Can't make this shit up. I asked the waiter what wine they were drinking.

"Brought they're own wine," he said.
"Hope you charged corkage," I said.
"The sommelier said it was crap," he said...

"The BBFC should realize there are scenes of gratuitous violence in 'The Dark Knight' to which I would certainly not take my 11-year-old daughter," Vaz said of the movie's 12A certificate, which means it is suitable for those age 12 and above. "It should be a 15 classification."

The board has acknowledged it came close to restricting the movie to those 15 and older. It also details the film's violent nature on its Web site.

The Times notes "Knight" received a PG-13 rating, while in Ireland and Scandinavia it was given a 15 rating in order to keep those 14 years and younger from seeing it without supervision. [UPI]

Tom & Jerry Smoking Scenes to Be Cut [Reuters]

Children's
Grammy winner Ashanti's ASHANTI STYLE, co-written with editor-at-large at Vibe Orlando Lima, an autobiographical account of her life and style that includes fashion and beauty tips, to Kelli Martin for Jump At The Sun, for publication in fall 2007, by projects manager Stephan Dweck and attorney Jerome Leventhal.

Oh lovely. Jon Benet would be so proud.

Schoolbooks Are Given F's in Originality [NYT]

New York's Newest Suburb [NY Sun]

While it was hard not to get a little teary when you saw Katharine's face erupt in joy upon her win ("Finally, I can have a real life!"), the real highlight was announcer Chris Connelly, whose gray hair and awkward cadence may not be hip enough for MTV but most certainly qualifies him for spelling bee color commentary. When runner-up Hackett — who 10 minutes earlier had been identified as half Chinese — was on a winning streak, Connelly noted, "The Tokyo Bride does it again!" (Or at least that's what it sounded like. We'd hate to think even the MTV movie guy would be so stupid.)

And as this chapter of linguistic glory draws to a close, we'll leave you with an adorably fitting correction that hit the AP wire last night:

BC-Spelling Bee, 10th Ld,190
New Jersey 13-year-old wins national spelling bee, first girl since 1999
Eds: SUBS lead and 3rd graf to CORRECT spelling of Katharine Close.

13-Year-Old N.J. Girl Wins Spelling Bee [AP]

From: Teen Vogue Admin
Date: Thu, 18 May 2006 00:52:17 +0000
To: [It Boy]
Subject: A Fun Summer Question for NY It Girls

Hi Andrea,

Tell us how you'll be spending your summer...and see how your plans stack up against other It Girls' plans! Click here for a fun one-question survey. Thanks!

OK, so a little misguided, but still: oooh! What could Teen Vogue be wanting of its well-heeled little readers?

Obviously the Hamptons, spending the summer trying to sneak into the Star Room. After all, these are It Girls, right?

Oh. God, we hope this doesn't mean Teen Vogue readers go to public school or something. (But to be fair, that waterslide place in Seaside is pretty sweet.)

Teen Vogue It Girls

Click to enlarge and weep for American youth.

Now that ELLEgirl is online only, surely they have time for charity. And so from the American hinterland (Alaska) comes a plea from young Matthew to those kind ladies: Help him find a blowjob in Juneau, preferrably the sort that makes him shoot a “wad of cum down a beautiful woman’s throat.”

Isabelle [MySpace]
Last Night's Party

Is MySpace Safe?

MySpace: Murdoch's Big Hope, Parents' Nightmare

MySpace: Good Idea Gone Bad?

Don't Be a Victim: Myspace.com Not All Fun and Games

Treading on Dangerous Ground

Concerns Over MySpace Grow

Teen Web Hangouts Can Be Goldmine for Predators

Kids at Risk on Highly-Popular Website?

MySpace: Parents' Concerns Grow

Not only are physically unattractive teenagers likely to be stay-at-homes on prom night, they're also more likely to grow up to be criminals, say two economists who tracked the life course of young people from high school through early adulthood.

Wow, we had no idea. We suppose this makes Seventeen editor Atoosa Rubenstein's enthusiasm for starvation much less offensive. Clearly, the woman is a crime-fighting vigilante.

The Ugly Face of Crime [WaPo]
Earlier: And a Thousand Teenage Girls Go Running for the Toilet

Either that, or he'll lose his virginity to the Proenza Schouler boys, just to spite her.

Marc by Marc Jacobs [Style.com]

** CosmoGIRL! **

Do you know a girl who'd make a great President? CosmoGIRL! magazine is on a mission to make a CosmoGIRL! reader win the presidential election in the year 2024, PROJECT 2024. They've established an internship program in which 7 lucky girls will get a chance to spend the summer of 2006 living in New York City, working at their dream jobs and learning about power from the inside. Get a strong, ambitious girl to apply today.

http://action.voterunlead.org/ctt.asp?u=2379309&l=115993 (pdf file)

Have a pleasant week.
The White House Project Staff

The White House Project, a national, nonpartisan 501 (c)(3) organization is dedicated to advancing women's leadership across sectors, enhancing public perceptions of women's ability to lead and fostering the entry of women into leadership positions, including the U.S. Presidency. Visit us online at www.TheWhiteHouseProject.org.

Don't laugh. Learning How to Perfectly Kiss Him has helped countless women break the glass ceiling.

But today is different, because we're laughing at the expense of innocent children. We're laughing so hard, honestly, that we can't properly write this item. You see, a Staten Island bus driver allegedly organized a fight club amongst the middle school kids on his route, urging them to fight one another and use scissors as weapons. It may not seem funny, but:

• The driver called himself The Emperor
• The Emperor rallied kids with his "sick Jedi mind trick"
• The bus was called The Death Cheese (a "mini Death Star on wheels")
• The toughest fighters were nicknamed Darth, Sith Warrior, and Jabba, according to "sources"

What sources? Jar-Jar Binks? Amazing. We don't even want to publish this post, just because we don't want the Star Wars Fight Club to ever end.

Meet the Jabba the Nut [NYDN]

After discovering that renowned children s-book author and publisher Harriet Ziefert s latest book, A Snake Is Totally Tail, is strikingly similar to Judi Barrett s 1983 book of the same name, publisher Blue Apple has announced that it will not be releasing the version authored by Ziefert, originally set for release in April.

First we question every memoir, and now Fake Writers are penning children's books? If that's how it's going to be, we've noticed some disturbing similarities between Mr. Happy and Little Miss Giggles that really need to be addressed.

'Snake' Bit: Publisher Turns 'Tail' on Next Literary Scandal Before It Bites [BookStandard]

We've looked at Hayley's MySpace profile and, aside from lying about her age, she actually seems like a decent kid (or, at least, she's not a member of any groups like "Edward 40-Hands"). We do, however, have one concern, and we're only going to raise this issue only because we care about our youth: the Vera Bradley bag. We mean, the girl's 16, we can overlook the arctic expedition boots. But Vera Bradley? Does her mother know about this?

Hayley [MySpace]
Earlier: Little Girl Dreams Can Come True

Not pictured, but obviously sitting next to happy Ali were her colleagues: Haylie Duff, Jamie-Lynn Spears, Nicky Hilton, Eric Roberts, Charlie Murphy, and Malachy Baldwin.

Makes you long for the good ol' days, when you could be famous just for being a slutty twatblossom.

Doggie Bag [OAN]