Did Starbucks just raise prices or lower prices? Both. From each according to his ability, and to each according to his need. Starbucks is fomenting socialism through macchiato pricing.

The Way We Live Now: Besieged by indignity. H&H Bagels is drowning in debt! Book fairs and organic dairies are threatened! It's a veritable Yupocalypse:

For as long as mankind has occupied New York, there have been two Starbucks locations on Astor Place, a block away from each other, which occasioned many predictable remarks. No more! This means everything.

The perpetually put-upon parents of Park Slope have yet another outrage to face! Already battling listserv fees and fighting sexist hats, the yups must now contend with dogs trying to eat their babies!

"Park Slope Parents," the Brooklyn listserv, is in the midst of a civil war between yuppie parents and list moderators. One combatant finally just snapped, and she's shared her rant with us.

The stroller-and-laptop-wielding factions of Park Slope have not yet broken out into open rebellion in the streets over the Park Slop Parents Messageboard Fee Outrage, although a splinter group may be increasing the palpable tension:

This bitter war over a fee(!) to post on the Park Slope Parents listserv is perfectly in character. Park Slope is where New York's most annoying parents sequester themselves in a twee, self-important doombubble.

Yuppie cokeheads, stop snorting massive rails for the sake of the endangered tree frogs! That's the new anti-drug message coming out of the UK. And it just might work! You might not stop for the sake of your money, your police record, or your septum, but would you give up blow if you knew that every eight ball cost…

If NYC residents could hope for anything good to come out of this economic crisis, it would be this: the rollback of gentrification. The Observer is already writing trend stories on it, whether it happens or not! Are you worried about whether your current neighborhood will remain safe for yuppies once the economy…

At a new condo in the East Village in NYC, a volatile mix of summer weather, a rooftop pool, gays, hipsters, and wealthy young hedge fund yuppies conspired to form a party that resulted, predictably, in drinking, drugs, debauchery, and defecation. Disasters of this type never happened when all members of various…

So yesterday the Times weighed in on everyone's most detested yuppie mecca, Park Slope. Today, the new issue of Time Out New York piles on! "Websites like Gawker and Curbed crackle with anti-Slope invective, hurled at the twin bugaboos of the 'Stroller Mafia' (pushy, indulgent yuppie parents) and the bleeding-heart…

Ethiopia doesn't have the world's most sterling reputation. Many people think of "famine" and "drought" when the country's name is mentioned. But the Ethiopians are lucky, in the sense that Starbucks has forged a connection between the parched and war-torn nation in northern Africa and yuppie coffee swillers across…

Like "cool," "hipster" is a multivalent word with no set definition but many different meanings. But from a real estate developers' perspective, if you live in Brooklyn, have read a Jonathan Lethem book or have gone to Studio B, you qualify. Sorry! Even so, no real hipster admits to being one. That's worse than saying…

Have you, like most of the creative underclass, been wondering to yourself, "What happened to all those yuppies we heard so much about in the 1980s?" Well at least in the UK, they're still there—but they have switched to a new acronym. Without so much as sending out a press release! Young urban professionals have…

Here is a full page ad in today's issue of The Onion (click to enlarge) that is so stupid I had to photograph it with my cell phone camera in a spontaneous feat of journalism. "LIVE HERE OR DIE," it says. This is an ad for Williamsburg Edge, the execrable new high rise yuppie condo in the Burg that previously…

Child-website Babble launched its Playground today, a "social network for young families." What, the bars and coffeeshops of Park Slope and Boerum Hill and the entire world isn't enough of a social network for these people? It has photos of babies and videos of babies. Some of those babies appear to be in bars. The…