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Obama's Thieving Geek Guilty of Bad Taste
White House Forgives CIO's 'Youthful Indiscretion'
Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
Obama's Top Geek on Leave after Minion Charged with Seeking $6 Million in Bribes
D.C. Bribery Scheme Unfolded Under Obama Geek's Nose

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Citizen Kang
03/19/09

In reply to Obama's Thieving Geek Guilty of Bad Taste
Geeks and webheads don't like to admit it, but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to be a computer programmer or work in technology. I've been a programmer for over a decade and have worked for several Fortune 500 financial institutions writing software for new startup divisions (all of which make billions in PROFIT; no chicanery or bailouts where I worked). All I have is a BA in History and Political Science. You can either get the knowledge in school or devote your every waking hour following the latest Asperger's-induced trend or do what I did: pick up a book and start programming. Granted it you take that last route you better pick up complex ideas like people change underwear and be very intellectually curious. It can be done and you can be doing some cutting edge stuff very fast. This is the dirty secret that geeks and nerds don't want to fess up to: it really isn't all that difficult to do their overpaid, pampered jobs if you just apply your average intellect to doing it right.
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BadUncle
03/19/09

@Citizen Kang: But what if you program at NASA? Doesn't that make you a rocket scientist?
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Citizen Kang
03/19/09

@BadUncle:

Tangentially it does. When I think Rocket Scientist (in first-letter caps) I think Werner von Braun or Goddard. The pioneers who did everything from theory to chemistry to get the things off the ground. These days everything is so specialized that it's hard to pinpoint who is the actual rocket scientist. Working at NASA does, however, make you the guy who works with the coolest gadgets in the known universe.
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BadUncle
03/19/09

@Citizen Kang: Dude, I know you people have flying cars. Just let us have them.
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AnnaZed
03/19/09

In reply to Obama's Thieving Geek Guilty of Bad Taste
I am ashamed to admit that I have no idea what a CIO at the Whitehouse even is.
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BadUncle
03/19/09

@AnnaZed: "Chief Information Officer." Sometimes called a CTO (Chief Technology Officer), in corporate America.
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BadUncle
03/19/09

In reply to Obama's Thieving Geek Guilty of Bad Taste
"Youthful Indiscretions" have evolved since my day. Back then, kids pulled bank heists, kidnapped Lindbergs, cheated at cards, and shived The Man. Now that was living.
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VoxPopuli
03/19/09

In reply to Obama's Thieving Geek Guilty of Bad Taste
Since this happened in the '90s, I'm hoping the shirts were the kind that had a different color for each panel of the shirt. God, those were ugly. I had at least one myself.
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karion
03/19/09

In reply to Obama's Thieving Geek Guilty of Bad Taste
Fuck, I give up, Owen. You are too Valleywag/tabloid for my interests.
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Owen Thomas
03/19/09

@karion: And yet you keep commenting! A conundrum.
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levari
03/19/09

In reply to Obama's Thieving Geek Guilty of Bad Taste
oh, shucks, there goes my chance at chief-assistant cigar-bearer to rahm emmanuel. i was busted in 94 for boosting a packet of bath salts. blush. bath salts. so cheap, i sold my political future. next time i'm going for major appliances.
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i'm a bottle
03/19/09

@levari: Nice.
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Oy Veh (Informality Reigns)
03/19/09

@levari: Fortunately, there is no record of any misdemeanors for me---I put out for the Mall Cops who tried to bust me! So I guess that I'm GOOD TO GO.
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Excusado
03/17/09

In reply to White House Forgives CIO's 'Youthful Indiscretion'
Wait. 20 years ago? The dude's in his 30s. This happened just over 10 years ago, unless there are some OTHER indiscretions the White House is referring to...
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macbeach
03/17/09

M@Excusado: Math is not one of the new White House's strong points.
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billybobnyc
03/17/09

In reply to Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
anyone remember Jerilyn? If she hadn't been banned, she could have explained this legal stuff. She is a lawyer, you know.
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valet_of_the_dolls
03/17/09

@billybobnyc: She's actually still around, posting as BxgrlJeri these days.
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IrmaGalung
03/17/09

In reply to Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
Am I the only one who feels like this headline is overly sensational? We're talking about something worth less than $300 when he was in college. Gve me a break. He's accomplished so much since then and he's held previous government positions. I would assume the White House knew and chose to proceed with his appointment anyway because he's qualified for the job - and isn't that what should matter? Also, if memory serves correctly, wasn't our last president convicted of a DUI?
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Shelwood
03/17/09

@IrmaGalung: But Bush's DUI was a youthful indiscretion! He was a mere 40-year-old lad.
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MisterHippity
03/17/09

In reply to Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
Problem is, while we were all discussing this, he JUST STOLE ALL THE WHITE HOUSE COMPUTERS.

Showed me, I guess.
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ninety_nine
03/17/09

In reply to Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
The third, more obvious, and likely correct scenario is that a PBJ is like an ACD in New York State (hello, Sheila!). If you get an ACD, you can answer "no" to a 'have you ever been convicted of a crime' question and it probably doesn't turn up in standard searches. And vetting forms probably don't ask "Have you ever been arrested?" (it wouldn't ask specifically for an PBJ, since each state probably has a different version).

Maryland complicates this with the J instead of the D, which would make this seem less breathless.
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MisterHippity
03/17/09

In reply to Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
Sorry, but, not knowing the details, I'm gonna assume that whatever he did was probably something trifling that most people would not consider a big deal.

He was only 21 years old at the time, and the crime is petty theft. The item worth "less than $300" could be a garden gnome he swiped off of somebody's lawn after drinking at a college party.

That's my guess ... this was an act of youthful vandalism, probably with some drinking involved. I'm not saying such behavior is a good thing, but it certainly isn't enough to disqualify someone from U.S. being CIO, in my view.
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Uncle_Billy_Slumming
03/17/09

In reply to Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
Only two possibilities? Think hard. There's at least one more.
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notsogreatsatan
03/17/09

In reply to Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
Unless I'm getting my math wrong, 22 is pretty old to chalk it up to youthful indiscretion.
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BadUncle
03/17/09

@notsogreatsatan: Until I take the dirt nap, I chalk up everything to youthful indiscretion.
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MisterHippity
03/17/09

.@notsogreatsatan:
@mattharvest:

Y'all need to learn you some MATH.

6/14/96 - 10/9/74 = 21 years and change.
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MisterHippity
03/17/09

@MisterHippity: Note also that age 21 + month of June = college graduation time for many folks.

I'm guessing that he'd finished all his classes and was partying with his college chums the night before the graduation ceremony. It would not surprise me if the item stolen was from a rival fraternity house.
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Aaron Altman
03/17/09

In reply to Barack Obama's CIO a Confessed Thief
"Lawyers routinely tell their clients who receive a PBJ that they can legally state that they have not been convicted of a crime."

Also, choosy lawyers tell clients to choose Jif.
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SuperBien
03/17/09

@Aaron Altman: Regular, Creamy, or Extra Crunchy?
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Aaron Altman
03/17/09

@SuperBien: The one with salmonella, of course! Pesky clients.
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MisterHippity
03/17/09

@Aaron Altman: The same lawyers routinely tell their presidential clients who receive a BJ that they can legally state that they "did not have sexual relations with that woman."
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Aaron Altman
03/17/09

@MisterHippity: Doesn't the "P" stand for "Presidential"? :-)
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MisterHippity
03/17/09

@Aaron Altman: Of course! Why didn't I think of that?

And man, was Clinton ever wrong about the legal implications of THAT kind of PBJ!
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