A few years ago, the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge took the nation’s Facebook timelines by storm, as hundreds of thousands of individuals poured freezing water on their heads lest they be forced to donate money to charity. In August of 2014, current presidential candidate Ted Cruz was one of those challengers. And like most videos involving Ted Cruz, this one’s hard to watch.

The video is typical Ted: contrived, awkward, and almost but not entirely approximating human.


Of course, this is nothing new for the reptilian firebrand. The real star this time is Ted’s beautiful hostage, Heidi Cruz.

Heidi, are you okay?

Heidi, do you want to talk?


Give us a smile, Heidi.

Just one smile for Ted, the man you continue to choose as your partner in life.

There it is.