Somewhere, high in a palm tree, nestled amongst the coconuts, Keith Richards approves.
William "Billy" Cantrell was arrested this week after allegedly stealing a box of ashes that his family says he probably believed to be cocaine.
"William thought it was drugs, he thought he'd done found him a box of cocaine is what he thought," Billy's grandmother, Wanda Allen, told News Channel 5.
The 28-year-old Tennessee man allegedly stole the ashes and an Xbox from his neighbor and brought the goods to his grandmother's house. The ashes were the remains of his neighbor's mother.
In the happiest possible ending for this story, it appears Billy did not get around to snorting his neighbor's mother; according to his grandmother, the original tie on the bag was unbroken and a a white piece of paper was still taped over with the "date of birth, date of death, name and the funeral home."