Speaking at the Radio and Television Correspondents' Association Dinner Thursday night, headliner Nick Offerman—who plays anti-government government employee Ron Swanson on Parks and Recreation—took the assembled news media to school with a timely lecture on the Bill of Rights.
"I feel like we, as a country—present company included—are a little unclear these days about the first 10 amendments, so if it's alright with you, I'm going to run us through a brief Bill of Rights refresher course," he led off, before riffing on Texas's open-carry yahoos, the NSA's omnipresence, and basically everybody's misunderstanding of "censorship."
Of course, some amendments require a little more explanation than others. On guns, Offerman—an avid hunter—had this to say: "The Second Amendment is not there to protect our right to intimidate the teenage cashier at Chipotle." He also called anyone who wants to settle a dispute with firearms rather than honorable fisticuffs "nothing short of cowardly."
Amen, Ron Swanson. Class dismissed.