Earlier this month, retired private investigator Mary-Kate Olsen was declared the worst Olsen twin of all time by her younger sister Elizabeth. On Friday, Us Weekly reported she is engaged to her boyfriend of "nearly two years," banker Olivier Sarkozy (half-brother of former French president Nicolas).
Many snoots and snots have sniffed and sneered over the relationship between the small-scale replica of an actress, 27, and the divorced father of two, 44. What they don't know is that Mary-Kate suffers from a glamorous, debilitating illness, and that Olivier Sarkozy is her devoted caretaker, nursing her to health at New York Knicks games.
Here are the 11 most adorbs photos of Mary-Kate Olsen and Olivier Sarkozy bleeding orange and blue.
On the first day, it was scary for Mary-Kate to be out in the world, which was filled with so much thunder and plastic. Continuous firm head strokes and warm soft kisses were needed to regulate her heart rate. (November 9, 2012: Knicks vs Dallas Mavericks)
The next time they went out, her caretaker gave her a pair of sunglasses to put on if she felt nervous. "They're like a blanket for your eyes," he said (in French). "You can put them on if you want to hide, but I will always find you." Mary-Kate liked that. (November 18, 2012: Knicks vs Indiana Pacers)
Sometimes the games were long, and Mary-Kate and the caretaker both wished they were home in bed. But they stayed because it was good for her. (December 13, 2012: Knicks vs Los Angeles Lakers)
Sometimes Mary-Kate's mind would wander. "What if I become frozen like this?" she would think, and then, to her horror, discover that her skin had hardened into a rigid carapace. Mary-Kate's caretaker would embrace her and pet her and tell her it was just her mind playing a trick on itself. Sometimes it would take several minutes before Mary-Kate's body could remember how to be skin again. (December 15, 2012: Knicks vs Cleveland Cavaliers)
Mary-Kate liked the kak! kak! noises that happened when people slapped their palms together. She would wait until the din died down to try, because she liked the sound of her own claps best of all. (February 4, 2013: Knicks vs Detroit Pistons)
"I'm going to practice leaving now, so you can see it's not so bad alone—just different," said Mary-Kate's caretaker one day. She would only let him go as far as a fingertip, but this was progress. (March 3, 2013: Knicks vs Miami Heat)
There were good days. (March 20, 2013: Knicks vs Orlando Magic)
And bad days. (April 23, 2013: Knicks vs Boston Celtics)
And days where it seemed almost like Mary-Kate understood what was happening. (November 3, 2013: Knicks vs Minnesota Timberwolves)
But no matter what was happening on the court, Mary-Kate could rest assured that she and her caretaker were in love. With the Knicks. (December 14, 2013: Knicks vs Atlanta Hawks)
Top image from November 20, 2013: Knicks vs Indiana Pacers.
[All images via Getty]