Some of the best dogs on earth are shelter dogs. Also some of the craziest dogs. Today, we celebrate these wonderful, insane, great dogs, with their totally real descriptions from a local dog shelter.
The Brooklyn Animal Resource Coalition is a fine animal shelter in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Two years ago, we brought some of their bracingly honest descriptions of their dogs. The time has come to check in once again on BARC's current crop of dogs and their real descriptions on the shelter's website. We salute this shelter for their work with needy animals, as well as their commitment to truth in dogvertising.
Bob— foxhound/ beagle mix
"Bob is really energetic, loves to play and loves to howl. Bob was recently surrendered back after getting adopted, because he got to aggressive with the owner, but was good with her children and other pets. He just developed separation anxiety, that we are working on now."
Bob will howl through the night and possibly attack you, though your children are probably safe. Adopt Bob now.
Diamond— pit mix
"Diamond is still being monitored for heartworm and is getting treatment for it, she is getting stronger every day. She doesnt like other dogs or cats."
It is good that Diamond is getting stronger every day, unless you are a dog or cat, in which case Diamond's newfound strength will be used to kill you. Adopt Diamond today.
"Greg is not a difficult dog, but he has behavior problems built in that you can live with. He doesnt like to petted in the face, he will allow head pat but to an extent, which is difficult sometimes because he loves to rub his body on you asking for rubs."
"Difficult" is not the word for Greg. "Devious" would be more accurate. Does he want a rub? Sure, he wants a rub. "Pleeeease, give me a rub," he seems to say. Then you touch his head and lose a finger. Adopt Greg today.
Johann— shepherd/ mastiff mix
"Johann is a sweet, big love muffin. He, however doesn't like joggers running towards him and will stop with his mouth."
Johann? A big old sweetie pie. Joggers? Loves em. As long as they're headed away from him, preferably at top speed. Biting? No. He would never do that. He might stop you, though, using his mouth, quite naturally, since it is the only tool at his disposal. Adopt Johann today.
Leroy— good dog
"By any measure, Leroy is a great dog! He was originally found as a stray several years ago and was adopted from us and lived with the family for 2 years. Sadly, some of his needs were sorely neglected, and he ended up being returned to us overweight!... He has been on a diet since he was returned and he is looking great now, having lost nearly 20lbs. His diet will need to be monitored closely, because he just loves his food. Perhaps it was his time as a stray that made him food 'obsessed.' In fact, he needs to be stictly kept away from human foods so that he doesn't try to steal your dinner."
"I'm fucking serious, man." *Grabs you by the collar, glaring at you with crazed, bloodshot eyes* "Keep him away from your food." Adopt Leroy today.
Maggie— sweet girl
"Maggie is a sweet girl with a heart of gold. She has been with us for quite a long while and is now 5 years old. We have struggled finding her a good home, through no fault of her own. She is good with other dogs as long as they are not getting rough with her. She has had several dog roommates here, but she doesn't enjoy jumpy nervous dogs. She is a little overweight right now as she gets stubborn when it comes to walking. She is crazy about squirrels and pigeons and will try to catch one. She doesnt like cats, people on skateboards and little kids on bikes. She gets aggressive with anyone holding a waterhose and wants to bite the hose. She is very trainable and will listen to whoever is the hand that feeds."
Maggie is perfect for a home with no dogs, cats, children, windows through which a yard or street is visible, open doors, or sudden movements. Adopt Maggie today.
Vanna— chihuahua mix
"She is super sweet and friendly, but she does need time to bond with her people. If you come by the shelter to visit her, the way how she loves us is the way how she will love you."
Vanna doesn't like you. Adopt Vanna today.
These and other fine cats and dogs are available for adoption at BARC. Shelter dog adoption is next to godliness.
[Top photo via FB]