It's that time of the year again when we set a pumpkin on the dinner table and gather around with knives and hammers and ice picks in hand to watch YouTuber hickok45 demonstrate the latest foolproof methods for sending that foul gourd straight to Hell.
Hickok45's "Pumpkin Killing" tutorials started four Halloweens ago as an "educational" how-to for the proper disposal of Pumpkins and have grown slightly more psychotic with each passing year, as hickok45's hate for the obese winter squash grows ever more irrational.
"Just something about the season, something about me, when I think about pumpkins, when I see pumpkins, something just kinda wells up inside of me," the professional woodsman says in the intro to his latest massacre. "Something must have happened in my childhood. Don't know what it was, maybe my mother dropped a pumpkin on my head, or dropped me on a pumpkin, I don't know what it was, but when I see them, something just comes over me."
Spoken like a true serial pumpkin killer.