Scientists recently discovered a blue crystal not currently being abused by meth users on—where else?—an Australian sheep ranch. With atom-probe tomography, it was declared that it is the oldest piece of earth still on Earth. How old is this, you ask?
When using two different types of age-defining technology, scientists determined that this tiny nugget was older than:
- The Internet
- Social media
- Your mom
- Your dad
- This douche
- This dildo
- This movie about this old thing that happened where old things still exist, but are still not as old as this crystal
- Drake rapping about the Rosetta Stone
- The actual Rosetta Stone
It is 4.4 billion years old and it comes from a period of "cool early Earth," which we have left in the very, very distant past. News of the discovery comes from SMH.com, and you'll be happy to know our sense of humor isn't a day over 13.