Today in Florida ManS

He's been so, so busy. Here's a roundup of his latest hijinks:

Florida Man Hops Out of Car to Knock Down 70-Year-Old at Crosswalk

Florida Man Tries to Rob Convenience Store Twice With the Same Toy Gun

Florida Man Pours Hot Sauce Over Ill 3-Month-Old Puppy to Shut it Up

(The puppy is fucking adorable and is expected to recover, thank Jove.)

Florida Man Is Shocked to Learn He's Getting a Medal of Honor

Florida Man Calls His Ex 145 Times in 11 Hours, Threatens to Blow Up Her Office

Florida Man Linked by DNA to 23-Year-Old Murder Case

Florida Man Streaks Through Upscale Neighborhood

Florida Man Streaks Across Causeway From Beach to Miami

Florida Man Overcomes Fear of Spiders By Tattooing Spider on His Face

(Blind) Florida Man Gets His Guns Back After Shooting Friend to Death

Florida Man Is Running For Congress at Age 101

Also:

Florida Woman Fails Sobriety Test While Wearing No Pants or Underwear

Florida Woman Calls 911 for Sex: "I Haven't Been Penetrated In Years"

Several months ago, a great commenter suggested that we start a Florida-only Kinja called Peninsulated. (Whoever you were, show yourself and take your credit!) We're not in Kinja-buildin' territory yet, but we're gonna start using that tag. 'Cause damn, Florida.

[Photo credit: Sandi Mako/Shutterstock]