First, you have to learn to type with one hand. Ha! Ha!

This is an authentic instructional video, circa 1997, for the primitive form of proto-sexting that we used to call "cybersex." This valuable artifact full of arcane knowledge recently resurfaced through the Found Footage Festival, by way of a thrift store VHS bin in Minnesota.

As you'll learn from a poorly-censored topless lady over the course of a minute and a half, Cybersex is actually pretty simple. Step one: Find a popular "chat room" where you can "real-time net conference," and post a message that subtly lets everyone know you're horny and looking for some of that good cybersex.

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For example, "i'm very horny and I'm looking for some good cyber sex. Are you interested?"

If you do this correctly, your shirt should suddenly disappear.

Step 2: yesssssssssss. With lots of S's.

And that's where the clip ends, so... congratulations, I guess? You just lost your cyber-virginity in the back of a Ford Taurus wagon on the information superhighway! Make sure to use your newfound powers for good, never evil.

[H/T Reddit]