First, you have to learn to type with one hand. Ha! Ha!

This is an authentic instructional video, circa 1997, for the primitive form of proto-sexting that we used to call "cybersex." This valuable artifact full of arcane knowledge recently resurfaced through the Found Footage Festival, by way of a thrift store VHS bin in Minnesota.

As you'll learn from a poorly-censored topless lady over the course of a minute and a half, Cybersex is actually pretty simple. Step one: Find a popular "chat room" where you can "real-time net conference," and post a message that subtly lets everyone know you're horny and looking for some of that good cybersex.

For example, "i'm very horny and I'm looking for some good cyber sex. Are you interested?"

If you do this correctly, your shirt should suddenly disappear.

Step 2: yesssssssssss. With lots of S's.

And that's where the clip ends, so... congratulations, I guess? You just lost your cyber-virginity in the back of a Ford Taurus wagon on the information superhighway! Make sure to use your newfound powers for good, never evil.

[H/T Reddit]