Chances are, you've heard that a bunch of celebrities allegedly got hacked yesterday. Chances are, you're also wondering, uh: These are celebrities?
It's true: the celebrity-nude-industrial complex has moved past the speed at which a reasonable adult can expect to keep up. Allegedly included among boldface names like Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton, and Kirsten Dunst, are a bevy of That Girls and Oh, Hers beloved by millennials and horny celebrity photograph-collecting creeps. If you didn't know Victoria Justice or Teresa Palmer until yesterday, we can help: Here's your guide to the lesser-known names on the leak list.
You might know her from: Downton Abbey, where she plays Lady Sybil Branson (née Crawley). She has a starring role opposite Daniel Radcliffe and James McAvoy in the 20th Century Fox remake of Frankenstein, set for release next year.
Fun fact: She claims not to own a television.
Fan base besides creeps: American Anglophiles, British Anglophiles
You might know her from: Her single with Iggy Azalea, her opening number with Nicki Minaj at the VMAs, or her bad case of "peanut butter mouth." Most millennials will recognize her from a show called Victorious (alongside Victoria Justice, also named in the photo leak) and its spinoff, Sam and Cat.
Fun fact: That signature bouffant is totally fake. "My actually [sic] hair is so broken that it looks absolutely ratchet and absurd when I let it down," she wrote recently on Instagram.
Fan base besides creeps: None
You might know her from: The immensely popular Nickleodeon tween show Zoey 101, and later, alongside Grande, Victorious. Justice so far has turned out to be the JC Chasez to Grande's Justin Timberlake—her singing career stalled just as Grande's took off, and she left Columbia Records not long after her debut single, Gold, tanked.
Fun fact: According to IMDB, she has the ability to do "eyebrow waves."
Fan base besides creeps: Teen girls
How you know her: Toni Collete's daughter on the short-lived United States of Tara? A recurring character on Community? Starring alongside Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum in 21 Jump Street? She also appeared—alongside fellow hacked celebrity Mary Elizabeth Winstead—in Scott Pilgrim vs the World and The Spectacular Now? Right? Remember?
Fun fact: Her first language was French, she designs her own fonts, and when the Daily Beast asked her what hackers would find on her computer, she responded, "Oh, man! I'm not telling. We'll have to wait till the government releases it." Oops.
Fan base besides creeps: Homeless actress Shailene Woodley seems to like her.
You might know her from: Palmer has done a string of films—including last year's Warm Bodies (alongside also-hacked Jennifer Lawrence paramour Nicholas Hoult)—but she's more well-known in the US for the famous men she's dated—Russell Brand, Adrian Brody, Topher Grace, and Scott Speedman. Now she's married to actor and musician Mark Webber.
Fun fact: She extolls the powers of rose quartz, crediting the stone for helping her to find lasting love. "I truly believe I manifested my husband," she told Malibu magazine this summer.
Fan base besides creeps: B-list actors
You might know her from: Her small but pivotal turn on Breaking Bad's second season, or from roles on Veronica Mars or Gilmore Girls. Most recently you've seen her on the—now lamentably canceled—Don't Trust the B in Apartment 23.
Fun fact: She grew up on a cattle ranch in Pennsylvania, where she apparently trained and rode her cow "like a horse."
Fan base besides creeps: TV critics (non-creep division)
How you know her: Her two gold medals in Olympic soccer as the goalkeeper for U.S. Women's National Team. She's reportedly set to shatter the WNT all-time shut-out record.
Fun fact: In June, Solo was arrested on domestic violence charges after she allegedly began drunkenly attacking her nephew, hitting him and berating him for being a pussy, fat and "unathletic."
Fan base besides creeps: Soccer fans and Seattle police
You might know her from: The Australian actress has landed three major television roles. She first gained popularity with a five year run on NBC's Chuck, which she followed up with a two-season stint as Michael C. Hall's poison-obsessed love interest on Dexter. Now she's starring on FOX's 24 reboot.
Fun fact: She got punched in the face this season on Louie and likes to tell the same publicist-approved story about conquering her fear of surfing over and over and over.
Fan base besides creeps: Redditors? Assuming there are some who aren't creeps?
How you know her: The actress is mostly known for her season-long arc on Glee alongside fellow hacked actress Lea Michele.
(Not so) fun fact: Eerily, her boyfriend was found dead of an apparent overdose in his hotel room almost exactly a year after Michele's boyfriend, Cory Monteith, died under similar circumstances.
Fan base besides creeps: Gleeks
Mary Elizabeth Winstead
How you know her: Winstead's logged multiple appearances in blockbuster sequels including the Ring Two, Final Destination 3, and Die Hard 4. She's also somewhat of an indie darling with appearances in films like Scott Pilgrim versus the World and The Spectacular Now—both, coincidentally, alongside hacked actress Brie Larson.
Fun fact: She's related to Ava Gardner.
Fan base besides creeps: Horror movie fans, manic pixie dream girl shippers
[images via Shutterstock, AP]