Lance Armstrong is finally taking responsibility, if only because he ran out of people to blame.

According to Aspen police, Armstrong was on his way home from a party earlier this month when he smashed into two parked cars and drove off. When police spoke with him the next day, he initially tried to pretend that the driver was Anna Hansen—his girlfriend and the mother of his children.

Lot of chutzpah for one of America's foremost public liars. Then again, this is the same guy who floated "you should have known I was full of shit the whole time" as a defense to fraud allegations.

Anyway, the ruse fell apart when a valet at the St. Regis told cops he remembered Armstrong in the driver's seat.

Hansen immediately confessed to her false confession and prosecutors were prepared to try him until he pleaded guilty this week to failing to report an accident and driving too fast for conditions.

So what, pray tell, is the lil' weasel's punishment? $238.50 paid by mail, four points on his license, and eventual restitution to the car owners. How many lives does this guy have????

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