Yesterday, as we reported earlier, Jimmy Kimmel hosted the fourth round of his feature "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets," in which real, live celebrities read negative Twitter messages about themselves aloud.
Journalist and writer Rebecca Dana found some of them so funny that she suspected they were written by professionally funny people. So she checked on Twitter to see if any professional comedians were behind them. Instead, it seemed that no one was: Some of these tweets or the accounts purportedly behind them didn't exist.
What better use of a calm Friday afternoon than to take the investigation further, through the whole history of the feature? Many of the accounts, on examination, had been suspended. That's not too surprising, given that they had been publicly highlighted for rudeness. But a few accounts had only posted one message—the one that amazingly made it on Jimmy Kimmel Live. Maybe they were set up as burners, for the writers to dismiss one star of choice and get out of there? A few accounts and tweets never turned up at all.
The first round of "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets" seems to be clean. All 14 of those posts are held by real, probably mean, Twitter users, who are still actively griping. The next set also looks pretty solid, with only two dubious accounts. But by the third round of "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets," three of the posts were suspicious, and one seems certainly fake. In the fourth and most recent installment, it's likely that four of the 13 posts are fake, with one more very suspicious contender.
The standouts of possible sham slander are below, with the videos of celebrities reading mean tweets following each set.
ROUND 1: 100 PERCENT VERIFIED or 92 PERCENT VERIFIED [UPDATED]
Of the fourteen total tweets, all of them seem to check out. Many of the original users are still writing foolish or mildly offensive posts, further confirming the quality of their character. Their last tweets include information about Jamba Juice, steroids, twerking, and Match.com.
- We just got a note that @kahlilfitz, who supposedly insulted Louis C.K., claims he never wrote that tweet.
ROUND TWO: 81 PERCENT VERIFIED.
Only two insults from the second round of "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets" don't totally check out.
- @Big Grains wrote: "If Mike Piazza's hair caught fire and someone put it out with a cast iron skillet, you'd have Danny McBride."
DUBIOUS. This user has one tweet which was featured on Jimmy Kimmel live (we took out the space between "Big" and "Grains").
- @dusted221 wrote: "Ever since @matisyahu shaved, he looks like old, fat Justin Bieber."
DUBIOUS. No evidence of this tweet, account is now suspended.
THIRD ROUND: 73 PERCENT VERIFIED.
The veracity of these accounts slips further in unaccountability. While 11 of the 15 usernames check out—and are still continuing to grouse, insult, and worm around on twitter—there is one account that had no results and three that were dubious.
- @theeznuts1 wrote: "@selenagomez is on the radio right now. Is there a volume lower than mute?"
DUBIOUS. Probably real, now suspended, but only wrote three posts.
- @212mseol wrote: "@DrPhil, why don't you shut the fuck up you bald-headed, big-mouthed hillbilly."
PROBABLY FAKE. No tweets or username associated with @212mseol.
- @DonkeyGoatFace wrote: "No one else finds Hayden Panettiere intolerable"
DUBIOUS. Only responsible for one tweet, which appeared on Jimmy Kimmel.
- @elgrizzolito wrote: "@RealTenaciousD, You guys are like Lennon and McCartney, only fatter and gayer."
DUBIOUS. Only four tweets, all November 8th. Isn't following anyone.
FOURTH ROUND: 61 PERCENT VERIFIED.
Apparently, the Jimmy Kimmel staff knew it had a good thing going. Of the 13 tweets selected for the fourth iteration of "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets," only eight were A-OK. Four seemed like they were probably invented, one other rated suspicion.
- @Zyx443 wrote: "Hey @zachbraff, I could take a picture of a piece of s#!t in my toilet and it would be a better movie than Garden State."
PROBABLY FAKE. No tweets or username associated with @Zyx443.
- @tweetlikeitsmyj wrote: "F*@k @BradPaisley and his f*@king country singing f*@king face."
PROBABLY FAKE. No tweets or username associated with @tweetlikeitsmyj.
- @saaanex9 wrote: "@KellyRipa is kind of amazing, when you think about how hard it must be to balance that huge head on a tiny body."
DUBIOUS. This account boasts 209 tweets, but many of them have a Horse_ebooks quality. @saaanex9 is following no one, and no one is following @saaanex9.
- @TWOSOUTHWRECKIN wrote: "Dear @nodoubt, The only thing in doubt is whether us music makes me want to puke or kill myself & then puke. Sincerely, everyone."
PROBABLY FAKE. No tweets or username associated with @TWOSOUTHWRECKIN.
- @GOLF-GUY_127 wrote: "It's a good thing Ray Romano is funny because his face looks like a dump I took today."
PROBABLY FAKE. This was one of the original tweets that sent up red flags, as the user-name would be impossible to make on Twitter. If you turn the dash into an underscore nothing turns up. If you take out all dashes, this user only has two tweets. Neither about Ray Romano.
It's hard to believe there's not enough genuine negativity on Twitter for the show to work with. Let that chaotic realm of inanity do the work for you, comedians. Take the afternoon off.
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