Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen - Gawker Comments

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

CheekyBreastfeedingMonkey — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 13:11:20 EDT

Do Jewish girls suck conch?

CheekyBreastfeedingMonkey

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

lefty — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 13:10:28 EDT

Statutory trafe?

lefty

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

tammyfey — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 10:47:16 EDT

Now, now, now. Yesterday, panties were twisted over a "black cab driver" and now we're all Code Red over some empty cyber-rattling? Shall we all just take a collective walk around the block, or at least a bong hit?

tammyfey

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Itsjustcatnip — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 08:00:14 EDT

Well I'd almost find it funny if it was the clam/oyster saying "that was disgusting", but I'm a little over-caffeinated at the moment.

Clam chowd-ah.

Itsjustcatnip

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Flashman — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 07:37:06 EDT

Yeah Rarus, who made you Cod?

Flashman

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

KarenUhOh — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 07:24:08 EDT

@LolCait: Gold Fish.

KarenUhOh

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

In Other News... — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 02:14:52 EDT

@LolCait:

Hear hear. But did we just fall for Rarus's BS hook, line and sinker?

In Other News...

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

MadameEducatrix — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 01:11:06 EDT

Wow, Cait. I'd add to that but it's late and I'm nacred.

MadameEducatrix

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

LolCait — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 00:41:54 EDT

I'm not normally one to comment late at night, nor am I one to comment negatively...but...um, Rarus? That was a little harsh. We read these things and comment on them because it's FUN. Any other meaning or import should probably be left at the door. We pun because it's funny, because it's silly, because we're provided with so much news everyday (from Gawker and new agencies larger) that is so shitty and depressing, that it's fun once in a while to just sit back and make a joke of it. So if you think I should be burned while my family watches, I say nothing simpler than "Fuck you" and I don't know why you're a commenter in the first place, because you clearly don't get the tone, readership, or ultimate intent of this site.

Goodnite, from very late in Brooklyn.

LolCait

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

the rat — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 23:27:39 EDT

This post smells kindof fishy to me.

the rat

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

lllll — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 22:02:57 EDT

I'm with Ian S.

That was funny, hed or no. Best one yet.

All others here who supplied puns should be incinerated with flame throwers while their families are forced to watch.

That is a funny cartoon.

lllll

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 21:45:07 EDT

@Ian Spiegelman: If it were a Woody Allen movie, she'd be Armenian, and her name would be "Daisy."

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 21:42:00 EDT

Cod. You just wanna cuttlefish?

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

SuburbanSocialite — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 21:24:41 EDT

I'm sure her bipedal curiosities have been more than satisfied as well.

SuburbanSocialite

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Ian Spiegelman — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 21:06:43 EDT

You know what though? If you remove that headline "BIVALVE CURIOUS NO MORE" and just leave the image and the word bubble, it's actually pretty fucking hysterical. It needs no further context, it doesn't need to address any issue: it's just a guy who fucked a huge clam or oyster and discovered the obvious.

Without the politically thoughtful hed, it's kind of the funniest, stupid, punkiest thing I've seen in ages. It's just too bad the author had to try to "better the joke" with that lame expository header. Without it, I could totally see Mel Brooks waking up in bed with some shell fish and exclaming totally Jewishly, "That was disgusting!"

This guy should head to Hollywood pronto. How can you all not see how funny the thing could have been?

Ian Spiegelman

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

DorothyMantooth — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 20:30:58 EDT

Seems more like a faux Post cartoon to me.

DorothyMantooth

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Colonel Mustard — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 20:00:01 EDT

@In Other News...: I'm just a Prawn in their little game.

Colonel Mustard

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

brokenface — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 19:50:19 EDT

he'd heard it's better when the clam is bearded.

brokenface

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

In Other News... — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 19:32:10 EDT

And finally - "You're no Octopussy!"

In Other News...

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

In Other News... — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 19:31:45 EDT

Take one and barnacle me in the morning.

In Other News...

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

In Other News... — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 19:31:19 EDT

@Colonel Mustard:

They know a plankton of jokes.

In Other News...

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Smitros — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 19:04:40 EDT

Clamydia?

Smitros

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

TechLackey — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 19:03:40 EDT

So which one got the pearl necklace?

TechLackey

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

fileunder — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:55:45 EDT

'i should have used...well, Fleet...before we did that.'

fileunder

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

el smrtmnky — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:55:12 EDT

"Always knew you were a shore thing."

el smrtmnky

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Colonel Mustard — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:53:53 EDT

@TechLackey: Without a trout.

Colonel Mustard

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

TechLackey — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:48:35 EDT

He did it just for the halibut.

TechLackey

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Clarence Rosario — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:43:10 EDT

Guess dude's going back to straight octopussy.

Clarence Rosario

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

djdavetrouble — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:38:33 EDT

IN THE IMMORTAL WORDS OF SHOCK G...
Now last night, underwater, I saw a French mermaid,
Treated her to caviar and wine over shrimp brain,
In the raw, on the ocean floor, need I say more?
You never heard nobody kick it like this before,
Pink champagne, octopus brains,
Saw your DJ underwater through the window pane.
That sucker tried to hit a mix, but the mix didn't happen,
Records kept floatin' all the fish kept laughin'
A blowfish blew my mind and started to rhyme,
As the octopus cut nine records at a time.
Your boy said, "Show me how to keep my records down,"
But the shark ate his amp, your boy got clowned.

The rhymes he say have no particular order
Un-derwater, Un-der-derwater,
Go 'head bite his rhymes if you think that you oughtta
Hold your breath, MC's, my rhyme's underwater.
(apologies for the pastemonkey)

djdavetrouble

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Colonel Mustard — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:32:05 EDT

@mathnet: @LolCait: You two are Krilling me!

Colonel Mustard

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

cugat — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:29:22 EDT

I'd shuck it.

cugat

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

if_i_only_had_a_heart — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:20:32 EDT

i hate it when you clam up like that

if_i_only_had_a_heart

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:14:37 EDT

@LolCait: Squid it!

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

LolCait — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:13:31 EDT

@mathnet: Hey, I gotta go, sashimi later if you want to come.

LolCait

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

LolCait — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:12:26 EDT

@mathnet: It'll be over in a snapper.

LolCait

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:12:16 EDT

We should invite Bob, that poor cockle.

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:11:01 EDT

@LolCait: I'm not really into Grouper.

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

LolCait — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:08:27 EDT

@mathnet: But we'll be careful. We'll abalone one drink.

LolCait

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

lalalina — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:08:08 EDT

@mathnet: bravo!

lalalina

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

whoneedslight — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:07:48 EDT

Are those pearls or HPV?

(sorry folks....)

whoneedslight

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

kpsquare — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:06:03 EDT

This little piggy had roast beef...

kpsquare

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:05:43 EDT

@LolCait: That child-mollusker?!

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

LolCait — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:05:08 EDT

"Let'scallop Ted Turner and see if he wants to join us."

LolCait

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Mabimab — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:01:34 EDT

Also, at least he didn't explore the homonid's chocolate starfish... talk about that clammy feeling.

Mabimab

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

lalalina — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:01:04 EDT

i'm not surprised. i hear that bivalves are shellfish lovers.

lalalina

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Mabimab — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:00:36 EDT

Gonna have to "filter" this one out of my mind.

Mabimab

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 18:00:12 EDT

@Gregory_of_Nazianzus: Maybe cocktail sauce.

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:59:13 EDT

@In Other News...: That's for the crabs.

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:58:50 EDT

Feed me, Seamour. Feed me all night long.

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

In Other News... — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:58:38 EDT

"Did you just give me clam-ydia?"

In Other News...

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:57:15 EDT

(S)he sells seashells by the seashore.

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:56:28 EDT

@LolCait: Peritwinkle.

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

LolCait — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:55:43 EDT

@BottomOnTop: @mathnet: I like a man with mussels.

LolCait

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:54:32 EDT

@BottomOnTop: Looks like pretty good seaweed.

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

LolCait — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:53:57 EDT

I thought these things were supposed to have beards.

LolCait

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

BottomOnTop — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:53:44 EDT

@LolCait:
@@mathnet:
It's a retainer-- helps with the voweeeel sounds

BottomOnTop

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

friend_of_a_friend — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:52:33 EDT

Are you sure this is part of the faux NYer cartoon contest? I think this belongs to Josh's post about what he did last night.

friend_of_a_friend

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:51:19 EDT

@LolCait: Snailed it!

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Moff — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:50:47 EDT

Hey, this guy might think it's disgusting, but some people like to keep their options open. The world is your oyster, and all that.

Moff

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

Gregory_of_Nazianzus — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:47:08 EDT

@mathnet: Tartar sauce stain? Pearl?

Gregory_of_Nazianzus

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

SnugglesMcButterworth — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:46:48 EDT

@mathnet: it sort of looks like Woodstock. Snoopy's friend. But that's just too weird. Right?

SnugglesMcButterworth

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

LolCait — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:45:12 EDT

@mathnet: It looks like a dental clam.

LolCait

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

mathnet — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:43:34 EDT

We have a wiener.

Also, what is that on the nightstand next to the bottle of wine?

mathnet

Maybe The Worst Faux 'New Yorker' Cartoon We've Ever Seen

irishbreakfast — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 17:41:36 EDT

Em, it's for the sins you committed today, sweetie.

irishbreakfast