<![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out" - Gawker Comments]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out" - Gawker Comments]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine: Whoa, whoa, whoa! You can read about cocks in all of my orifices, but that email... Guys, that was personal!

ChupaCaBrooklyn

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Oh, you white people.

ChupaCaBrooklyn

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> SM you made me laugh. In our part of the world a party aint a party until you wake up the next morning with a perfect bruise ring around your arse from where you fell into the toilet and you can't walk proper for two days.

And someone threw all the lemons in the house across the lounge as target practice.

It's just a given. Damage happens. Thank god for no broken legs or dead bodies.

ethel-egg-nog

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I feel like I just found Superman passed out drunk in an alley..his true identity revealed to me. I love Jezebel and Slut Machine's posts are among my favorite there but this diatribe is so absolutely fucking ridiculous and the resulting anger from Ms. Machine and Moe is even more so. First of all I see spilt drinks, confetti, a hole in the wall, broken picture frame..basically a mess after a party. And not that bad a mess. It's late and I'm cranky but if one of my friends sent me that I'd write her off as a spoiled brat with a huge sense of fun but no sense of humor..which I know well because I fit that description perfectly. I bitch and complain but it's usually directed towards people who aren't my friends who I threw a party for..to have fun and get drunk with. A (unused?) tampon on my couch would provide post-party laughs..not a cranky note about how I didn't want to pick it and glitter up and throw it in the trash because I had a huge scratch on my arm and a sore ass (which is somehow included on the list of blame). Come on. Come on! People spill drinks, stumble, break shit and aren't in the state to care enough until the next day when they'd have sympathy and help out if you didn't tear them a new one for being drunk..though not drunk enough to pass out like the host. If I were them I'd return the niceties by making up stories about how Ms. Machine caused all the damage during a drunken rampage and making her laugh it off with a beer after work. In the end..despite the hypocrisy and self-entitlement that protects her from criticism and her own actions..this was very funny, brilliant and I hope her friends understand her enough to excuse this. Maybe even embrace it..'That's our Slut Machine!' She could've written a great Jezebel post out of this.

lesbiansayswhat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> After reading this long, tedious thread, I think the obvious question is: who in this day and age still has FRIENDS?

TyraMale

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @ThatFiestyOne: I think you nailed the reality of the situation. Slutmachine tried to control the narrative of the story and she tried to score some extra bucks in the process, but it all went awry. She's awfully naive to believe Josh would not seize the opportunity to make a fool of her (not very difficult, apparently) The real winner here is Mr. Denton who managed to shift the attention from his dwindling staff of editors. The pageviews alone should finance the cleanup process!

SeaBassTian

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> *attention-seeking

LittleV

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> No one deserves to have their place trashed, especially by so-called friends. And thanks to Jezebel, I have come to respect Slut Machine/Tracie's writing so much more since the days of Potty Girl (although I still find her terribly seeking sometimes -- like, you can't find a non-contour bra? seriously? or do you just want to talk about your boobs again?)

But I see the apartment photos on Gothamist and can only say, SM/T is very fortunate to have such a lovely home, and if I were so lucky I would have protected it by staying somewhat sober. Are you paying your own mortgage on that? It's totally not my business, I know that ... it's rhetorical.

LittleV

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> NYE Mess at Gawker Media Editor's Condo, Gawker Reports

scarcat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Congratulations @slut machine: You made gothamist!

scarcat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @htotheomo: Well it has been years and that was a one off.

Before that incident it had been at least five or six years before something like that happened. (And to be honest even at the party I'm describing I had left a hour or two before the shitty stuff happened.)

But the three times in my life I've seen it happen it's always been the same deal - people who know each other really well and are really comfortable together and then something just goes horribly wrong.

It almost never happens with people you don't know very well - because when you are around those people you keep your guard up.

My general feeling is that every so often people fuck up big time. If they are your friends you forgive them.

That's life.

drunkexpatwriter

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @hiredgoons:Plus, Elvira boobs! And random internet dating!

You darn kids! You and your shenanigans and hijinx!

undone

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @drunkexpatwriter: Hopefully, by the time you are an Old, you will realize that you'll never have to say to anyone, much less a friend, "you fuckers fucked up, now make it right." Ever. I haven't even heard of such looting since high school when I rode my unicycle to the Fair.

htotheomo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Damn, I haven't been to a party that sounds as hilarious as that one must have been in years!! also: Champagne Waterboarding-LOL

Shinyfluff

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Kataroo_Kangaroo: I ignored it the first time, but then you brought it up again, thereby indicating a misplaced sense of accomplishment/pride. So, allow me to save you thousands of therapy dollars: Your "over 30" year-old is a reject. He would probably date teenagers if it were legal.

mysweetmango

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> -She doesn't wash her hands after using the bathroom.
- A Dolly Parton Poster is her most prized possession.

- 'nuff said.

HiredGoons

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Because it's the end of the day, and I don't know how else to kill time at the office:

Maybe in a moment of anger Slut Machine failed to remember Gawker's specialty seems to be publishing seemingly private emails and posts for all the commenting world to tear apart. Then again maybe she didn't forget at all, and secretly hoped for it to be published to garner pity. For what, I don't know.

She probably expected a flood of comments would pressure her horrid little friends to crawl back to disaster area (which is NOTHING compared to some of the parties I've witnessed) on their hands and knees throwing wads of cash down her titty canyon and begging for forgiveness.

But that's not what happened. Sure, we can sympathize with any situation that isn't puppies and rainbows, but Slut Machine has clearly set herself up for the unrelenting blows of the online world.

Excuse me as I shimmy up this pedestal to offer Slut Machine some advice.

1. If you can afford that place, you can afford the cleaning bill. Suck it up. Pay it. Move on.
2. Your friends are not going to cough up any cash for this.
3. Get some new friends.
4. Don't just say you're the party hostess, act like one. People support victims, not boozehounds.
5. Wash your hands when you use the bathroom. How are we suppose to take you seriously when you bitch about filthy people knowing that?

ThatFiestyOne

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I feel awful for Slut Machine - I would go ballistic if my friends trashed my apartment like that but this is the reason why I don't have parties at my house to avoid my crazy lunatic friends throwing shit around.
But I have to say, this is the funniest thing that I've read today.

habibi

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I'm getting kind of tired of looking at fatty boobs all day.

But this was damn funny.

Damnit, I just dropped my world's tiniest violin.

MonkeyPants

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> All infighting on morality aside, I must say that I plan on adding the term "shit slice" to my vernacular immediately.
@slut machine: I know you're pissed at Josh AND your friends now, but I've gotta say that email was hands-down the funniest thing I've read on Gawker today. I aspire to be able to say "fuck you" to my friends with such eloquence and gusto someday.

HeyThatsMyBike

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @drunkexpatwriter: I'm with you. I read Slut Machine's blog (long before she ever came to Jez), and after I saw this post I went looking for the pictures myself - and they aren't visible unless you use the link Josh posted. I don't know the individual history (other than the Moe vs. Blakely incident), but I must admit, the infighting between the Jez and Gawk camps is kind of a guilty pleasure. Like Meatballs.

On the subject of evil deeds done to apartments, my aunt used to own a rental property whose delinquent tenants made sure to steal every lightbulb and doorknob and crammed wads of cooked spaghetti and poopy diapers down the heat registers throughout the place when they moved out. Although I'm sure even on its best day, Emily and Michelle's place is somewhere in between that and SM's post party disaster zone.

I am deeply concerned for the health and well-being of the Dolly poster and must have an update ASAP.

I just don't know how to love you today, Gawker.

Hez

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @jezebelmoe: Moe, I was with you up 'til there. You fuck up the anonymity left, right and center on a regular basis.

That said, I could not be more depressed that people are equating Slutmachine's sexual proclivities with a lack of moral fiber. Sigh. This is why I've had to pare down the one-night stands.

KillMeNow has a stalker named Yolanda

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @SeaBassTian: People like you are the reason why fewer men are the recipients of sexual largesse.

KillMeNow has a stalker named Yolanda

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Sorry I fucked up your ass Jezebel. But if you remember any of it, you'll recall how much fun it was!

ScrewedByTheMan

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @drunkexpatwriter: ...I have no idea which one anymore - and for whatever reason the drinking got us crazy and the dude ended up with with a broken television, DVD player and curtains that had been set on fire.

Whatever reason? There are several reasons.
1: It wasn't a party, where people tell jokes and talk and bond over a few drinks and good food. It was more like 25 winos breaking into a liquor store.

2: No one in your friend's circle - or SlutMachine's - respects eachother enough to dial it down and avoid puking, pooping and destroying prized posessions. It's more important to Have A Good Time, which includes all those things. And it's all ok if you repair the damage! (Kinda hard to replace irreplaceable heirlooms and mementos, but whatevs!)

Sometimes tribal shit takes over at parties and things go wrong - whether you are 22 or 45. Then you make it right.

Tribal Shit = No respect or self control. I've had parties that the cops came to about the noise where the only thing I had to do next day was run the dishwasher a few times and press the button on the Roomba.

If people use alcohol as a coma inducer instead of a tasty social lubricant, it's probably time to move out of the frathouse.

BettyCrocker

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Sucks a big crooked one, but really, if i host a party at my house I dont get so drunk i pass out in my own vomit. I just can't bring myself to do it while i babysit my pretty stuff.

trevkong

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Do you still need a date? I am very clean, tidy, reliable, and only part asshole (like maybe 1/32nd).

TheMeanMillerMonster

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @PandoraSpocks: I disagree.

About four years ago a bunch of us had a party at a dude's pad - some holiday, I have no idea which one anymore - and for whatever reason the drinking got us crazy and the dude ended up with with a broken television, DVD player and curtains that had been set on fire.

He let everyone know he was pissed off and we all got together and chipped in money to replace the broken things.

His anger was justified, as was our attempt to make it better.

Sometimes tribal shit takes over at parties and things go wrong - whether you are 22 or 45. Then you make it right.

As to the dudes who have been like "but you posted emails from other people" in every instance I've seen the person has either been somewhat famous or else the names had been changed.

The part of it was "on her blog" is bullshit. If you look at the URL of the link posted it was clearly part of a friends only section of her blog (which doubly sucks because people could have used that link/URL to read other private postings.)

And passing out at 330 a.m. is not fucking crazy - in general you trust your friends. And yes, sometimes they will fuck up. In which case you have the total right to say "you fuckers fucked up, now make it right."

drunkexpatwriter

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @PandoraSpocks:
Indeed. Better friends AND a self-esteem (livelihood?) that is not predicated on self-destructive behavior.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @La Cieca:
Nice.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine: No dear. Not all of us are jealous of your really nice house -- some of us live in places even nicer. And if you had an ounce of sense you would have:
1: Invited some big guy whose nickname is Mongo or something to help keep order. And keep out the assholes that you don't know.
2: Not gotten so drunk that you passed out at your own party.
3. Expect that anyone at Gawker could resist posting this fabulous story, much less think they should pay for the cleaning.

This does not excuse what your "guests" did, either but it suggests you need better friends.

PandoraSpocks

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @mysweetmango: No, I did look hot. The pictures confirm that. But there really wasn't any advantage to be had. Everyone was their with their spouse and I had a date (who was over 30). But, I will concede that being younger is not a de facto correlation with being good looking.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> meh. i've had much worse damage done to my house by my friends, including having it get set on fire, a plate-throwing contest, citrus fights, india ink fights, someone get thrown through a window, etc. you just have to laugh, and then get them back.

southernbitch

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @lilyb: Agreed. If we lived in a circa 1840 novel, people could "ask for their letters back" and receive them tied with a ribbon and a tinge of regret. But we don't. We live in the age of no private electronic communication and where ladies are called SlutMachine instead of Charlotte. Improvements!

It seems to me that some of the commenters early in the thread could access the pictures, which makes them not private. Could be wrong, but I don't think so.

BettyCrocker

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @mysweetmango:
I couldn't agree more. The "you-mean-I-have-to-work-out-to-stay-thin...?" thing hit me kind of hard, but even that is a good thing.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine:
You're not creating a very compelling case for yourself.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Great post Josh. One of your best.

Slutmachine or Mo, if you'd like to link to the places where you've used Jezebel or your comments on Gawker to defend Robert Olen Butler or John Fitzgerald Page or any of the other people who assumed their actions or e-mails would remain private because they were writing to close friends or dealing with professionals, you just point to them. Otherwise, you know what, your protests are just adding to the overall entertainment value of this post.

Which is pretty damn high.

lilyb

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @mysweetmango: Yep! Hear, hear.

hotcheetos

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @almostzooey: It would probably cover the cleaning bill. Would she then have to thank Josh? Could he pretend that was the plan all along and get away with it?

nutmeg

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @almostzooey: When you consider that every blogger's nightmare is "oh god, what the hell am I going to write about today," and here this perfect topic falls right into SlutMachine's lap, and it never occurs to her to, like, BLOG ABOUT IT.

I mean, if you're emailing dozens of people who work at gossip sites photos of your wrecked apartment along with a few hundred words describing exactly where all the wine and vomit landed, it's at best naive to think that they story is not going to make the rounds. So why not take ownership of the story yourself with the angle "Last night I tried really hard to be a badass and unfortunately I succeeded?"

Of course, this angle would require SlutMachine's having a sense of humor to go along with her sense of entitlement, so good luck with that.

BTW, well done, Josh. You are a trickster god.

La Cieca

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Kataroo_Kangaroo: No. You THOUGHT you looked hot and THOUGHT you had an advantage over the other women. Being 20 years younger doesn't make you better looking de facto. Sorry!

But I'm sure you were quite lovely, nevertheless.

mysweetmango

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @mysweetmango: That's why I only date men over 30...

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I think Tracie should get any pageview bonus generated by this post. Just saying...

AlmostZooey

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Furious_George: Lots of reasons to look forward to life after 28, Furious. The men are better looking, better paid, better in bed, and (generally) better behaved than the young'uns. The women are also better looking (though in a different way than their younger, butt slogan sweatpants-wearing counterparts), better in bed, more mature, also better paid, and much cooler than they were a few years previous.

Honestly, 28 is when adult-life begins. It's awesome. You'll love it. The only real rules are: Drink plenty of water, get adequate excercize, and moisturize daily.

mysweetmango

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @polyesterbridesmaid: We generally protect the identities of people's "meant to be private emails". Sometimes they out themselves, as happened in a particular case (mine!), and yeah, we know how to take what we dish, of course. But Josh got this email because Tracie invited him to the party, as a friend and co-worker, so while it was fair game as everything and anything is, we're still allowed to say, "Hey Josh, that was a sorta dick move." There's a very fine line, it was clearly crossed here, you probably don't give a shit but if you want to know where that line is I think a certain video editor could point it out for you.

Moe

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine: But YOU KNEW THAT ABOUT JOSH!

Was he on your list?

atipofthehat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @SLUT MACHINE
I guess I can appreciate this difference. But since both Gawker and Jezebel traffic in letting us see people's meant-to-be-private emails, it seems hypocritical that you're so angry that it happened to you.

polyesterbridesmaid

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> yo, that shit was not a story on my blog. i created a hidden page for people just on my private invite list to see, so i wouldn't have to attach a million photos to the email. so this was not for the public.

josh is an ass person for doing this.

Tracie

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @polyesterbridesmaid:

I do think that Ms. Egan has an absolute right to communicate privately, and that it has nothing to do with her pussy or her job.

But in reality? To run down the list:

- Defend your email with a signature privacy/copyright/intellectual property notice
- Use PGP or another public key crypto program
- Send your message as a password-protected PDF, and distribute the password separately
- If someone posts your private, copyrighted communication, invoke the Digital Millenium Copyright act and go directly to the Web host (hard to do if it's your boss's company that posts your private email)

If you don't take these or better measures:
- Assume it just looks private, but isn't
- Be willing to suffer what Gawker media puts others through!

atipofthehat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Also, I want to hear about the winner of her contest. Because some of the candidates were, um... special.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Shame about the party, but Slut Machine's lucky if she doesn't have roommates (as it appears). Sucky situation.

I've been the roommate cowering in my room and playing scrabble with my three friends (after I found a Wellesley "lesbian"and boy in a fisherman's sweater totally going at it in my room, on top of my O-magazines) until the thumpy thumpy electronica of the party was over. When we emerged, the bathroom had been occupied for two hours by a boy (Harvard, underage, virginal!) who had passed out on the toilet, puking, and missing the bucket which was in front of him. Another boy was passed out in there covered in blood. People were playing acoustic guitar and refusing to leave. One guy refused to take a cab since it was against his religion. All of these kids were Harvard fuckers and future i-bankers.

The hostess passing out and the girl falling down the stairs description are eerily familiar, really.

stuckingoshen

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I am sorry but this is nothing. this party my little sister went to where i grew up puts this bitch's whining to shame. When someone craps inside your piano and fills water guns with piss to soak your walls, then complain.

If I was there I would have upperdecked her toilet. Actually, I think I did. check her tank. And really, if you can afford a two level apt, you can afford a cleaning lady for being an idiot.

[www.philly.com]

that was my idea

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @polyesterbridesmaid:
"opened herself up" ... heh.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> To be clear--obv Tracie had a bad experience. I don't really know or care much about her friends and who deserves a scolding. She hardly deserves one bec she writes about her sex life on the internet. But being surprised that putting the story in her blog and sending out a group email resulted in the story getting out is not very bright considering where she works.

triplethreat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> C'mon, respect a ho's privacy. I mean, why would a girl adopt the nickname Slut Machine if not to boldly emphasize reticence in calling attention to herself?

PaperBoy

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Kataroo_Kangaroo: nice rally!

TroubleonWheels

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Furious_George: The fuckers left so they wouldn't have to clean up. I'm convinced. The party was totally worth the clean-up though... I established myself as the guitar hero champ, beat an australian in a drinking contest, and still managed to maintain a respectable level of drunk while looking hot, if I do say so myself. Granted, I was 20 years younger than the other women there, so I had an advantage, but yeah... no awkward clingers, and after a few hours of clean up we threw in the towel and watched a LOTR marathon. And by watched I mean I slept off most of my hangover until I went to the bar last night.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @atipofthehat: True about the excessive views on Jezebel. Someone really ought to go over to Slut Machine's post on Mean Girls and invite them to join this discussion of a Crap E-Mail From A Chick.

scarcat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Kataroo_Kangaroo:
Middleage drunks are the worst drunks.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Help Grandma understand: this woman writes on the internet chiefly about her pussy and doesn't understand she has opened herself to public scrutiny? She is angry that a post that appeared on one website appeared on another? This makes no sense.

polyesterbridesmaid

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @drunkexpatwriter:
Oops, sorry. Maybe I should've said "I hope she learns."

Girlfriend's gotta get it together.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Kataroo_Kangaroo: At least the guests left at 9. Nothing's more annoying than party guests who insist on sticking around and hanging out all the next day. It's like, no, motherfuckers, I'm not interested in grabbing breakfast somewhere, then lounging around smoking pot until 3pm. I'm hungover, I'm tired, I'm cranky, and I want to suffer in silence.

Furious George

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @drunkexpatwriter: No, anyone who comes to public attention is fair game. Especially people who influence opinion.

atipofthehat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @MisterHippity: Jezebel actually is the media -- their post with the most hits last year was 15 times more viewed than the Foxymorons!

atipofthehat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Furious_George: *shrugs* I'm only 22. The family I au pair for hosted the party, and as the only other adult in the house at the moment besides the dad, I had a big hand in the clean up. Granted, I also had a big hand in mocking the men that couldn't shoot whiskey, resulting in more empty liquor bottles than anyone had imagined in the Europeans trying to prove they could out-drink a southern girl (I was not the one to puke in my bathroom that night, thank you very much!), which probably didn't help the mess I found yesterday morning (and still will be working on today...)

But yeah, a fair amount of people crashed at the house. Because it's a big fucking house. But they were going strong til about 4ish, and were gone by 9.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Your clean-up sucks and your friends are despicable, but maybe some perspective is in order: At least the fire department and paramedics were not present at YOUR NYE party!

TroubleonWheels

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Cokewhores cokewhore without coke.

Solomon Grundy

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Kataroo_Kangaroo: But when fortysomethings have drunken parties, aren't they usually key parties? Or something like that? Just say yes; I am desperately searching for a reason to look forward to 28 and beyond.

Furious George

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Solomon Grundy: Actually, she very clearly pointed out that she's *not* a cokewhore, which is why she passed out. I'll give her drunkorexic, but if you're going to be an ass to someone at least get your insults right.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @triplethreat: Anyone who writes a CEFAD deserves to be mocked for it.

And for all of yall blaming the 20 somethings for a crazy mess- my party was mostly 40 somethings and the place was still destroyed. Mixing copious amounts of alcohol and people of ANY age will result in a mess. And the pool table still smells like beer...

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> if you're surprised this would happen, then you're as clueless as a narcissistic cokewhore alcoholic who would fall asleep in her own puke on new year's eve. oh wait.

Solomon Grundy

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> People tend to be a little worse than usual on NYE no matter who's hosting the party.

RocketSurgeon

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Man there are some patronizing fucktards commenting here today.

@SeaBassTian: Fuck you. A woman can call herself anything she fucking wants and still be worthy of respect.

@Trampoline: You suck too. "Eh, she'll learn" is just patronizing bullshit.@SeaBassTian: I've been at parties where otherwise responsible people have suddenly turned into batshit assholes. It happens sometimes. I've also been at parties where people who act like fucktards at bars have acted really mature when they were in a friend's home.

drunkexpatwriter

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Furious_George:
Agreed. There's more to hosting a party than buying booze. You're the de facto "responsible one." Eh, she'll learn.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Wow, I felt sorry for her until I read her letter.

Trampoline

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I refuse to accede moral authority to someone named Slut Machine. Having said that, I do sympathize with your predicament. However, these people were good friends of yours. Surely, you were familiar with their level of maturity. Could you not have anticipated the bad behavior? It sucks that they trashed your apartment, but you invited this trash. Perhaps, it's time to select better quality amigos.

SeaBassTian

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Cookie Guggleman: re Someday you'll look back on your comment about why you passed out at 3:30 a.m. and laugh. Trust me."

I'm laughing already.

SheWalkedWithAZombie

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Perhaps if Josh had posted it as "Crap email from a chick" and thinly disguised it, the way Moe did with her ex, who also worked at Gawker, it would be OK!

triplethreat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @MisterHippity: Apparently, this was also posted to Slut Machine's blog, since some Gawker commenters got to see the pictures. It has since been taken down, but when Josh put it up here, it was out on the internet for anyone to see.

Kinda hard to say it was private.

BettyCrocker

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @jezebelmoe: @slut machine: I begin to get an idea why people drink so much at this chick's parties. Ugh.

La Cieca

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine: If you had Katie Couric's job I'd somehow find a way to watch American television news.

and @triplethreat: As far as I can tell this wasn't posted on Slut_Machine's actual blog. At least when I go there it isn't there. Josh seems to be linking to some friends only section of her blog which is a different thing.

Also, Gawker people are not celebrities. They are writers. Just because they interact with you on the comments board and you sometimes get to see their pictures does not make them celebrities.

It makes them employed.

drunkexpatwriter

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @jezebelmoe: Well, fuck me too, I guess, cuz I though triplethreat made a good point.

Robert Olin Butler deserved this, but Slut Machine didn't?

I know the Butler e-mail was posted to Gawker, not Jezebel, but Slut Machine used to write a regular column for Gawker too, as I recall.

MisterHippity

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @triplethreat: you make no sense. and media figure? what, so i write about my own pussy and tyra banks on a blog and all of a sudden i'm katie couric or something?

Tracie

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @triplethreat: oh FUCK YOU. Are you fucking kidding me? You had better be fucking kidding me. Fuck yourself.

Moe

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> SM, if you have a signed Dolly Parton poster in your nice apartment, why the fuck isn't it behind glass? Or, at least, plexiglas? Poster frames are like, what, fifteen bucks?

Damn.

Dolly framed mine.

Hope your arm and ass feel better soon.
Jolene

Elle Menopi

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine: It never fails to astonish me that the Jezebel staff consistently expects levels of respect, privacy and understanding that they make a living by not extending to anyone themselves. You became a media figure, you are fodder. Boo hoo.

triplethreat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I have sympathy for Slut Machine. I truly do. But: if you put something on your blog, it's no longer a "private email" and it's kind of uncool to call Josh an asshole for reposting it. That said - OxiClean and Mr. Clean Magic Eraser are your real good friends now.

So is the concept that parties that end like this are not "awesome". The hostess is responsible for her guests and shouldn't puke and pass out. Fire happens, people get alcohol poisoning and die, along with lots of other bad things when the host of a soiree is unconscious in a puddle of chunks. As someone else suggested, somebody at least should be in control. When I wanted to get hella fucked up as a host, I delegated that duty to a friend, who then got repaid with a really nice dinner out as soon as I could manage solid food again.

The tampon on the sofa is the ultimate party favor.

BettyCrocker

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> One word. Schadenfreude!

JesusKong

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> If someone got wine on my signed Dolly Parton, I'd fucking kill them.

Or more likely, I would get drunk and trash their apartment.

misszoe

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> This whole thing made me nostalgic for the old Port Authority Bus Terminal.

Michael Jahn

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> i want to hear about LolCait's Muppet party.
In other news, I just drooled Tootsie Pop juice on my keyboard. Who says going back to work isn't fun?

GinaRomantica

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Ha, my roommate invited 5 of our friends over to drink champers at 9 pm, and here's what I ended up with:

- A good portion of the track team from college and their hammered younger girlfriends, brandishing bottles of Andre.
- A coterie of asian girls I DID NOT KNOW who promptly commenced to breaking as many wine glasses as they could get their hands on and falling asleep in a a pile of cupcake wrappers on my kitchen table.
- Crazy dance party with people making out everywhere.
- A trip to the diner for an omelet at 330 am.
- My apartment reeking of pot.

Slut Machine, I would be PISSED if someone got wine on my signed Dolly Parton poster. Not that I have one. But IF I DID...

BK_KT

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @smithhimself: OMG - Much agreed. I think Auld Lang Sine actually addresses this issue directly: "Let old acquaintances be forgot".

And if that's NOT what the song says, then that's totally what it should say.

mysweetmango

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine:

Someday you'll look back on your comment about why you passed out at 3:30 a.m. and laugh. Trust me.

Cookie Guggleman

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Does anyone else think it sorta sucks that that email doesn't really appear on Slut_Machine's blog and yet is linked her as though it does?

drunkexpatwriter

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @teledingo: god I hope so!

guys, I'm sad - tracie (graciously!) refused my offer... damn it! I wanted to get high and clean slut machine's home!! WAAAAHHH!!!

the supergoddess

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine:
that is the wrong response.
the right response: party at josh's apt while he's in london.

mitchel_stevens

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine: You have a right to:
a) be pissed at the assholes that trashed your place;
b) question their friend-worthiness; and
c) take some responsibility for trusting NYE drunks.

CaptainFantastic

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I do agree with the whole "you set the tone of your own parties" thing, though. To a large extent, booze + twentysomethings = a formula for mess that you cannot control. But you can, at the very least, influence the severity and style of the mess by not establishing the party as a frat house-style free for all.

Don't get too fucked up yourself, curb obnoxious behavior where you see it, and keep tabs on whomever you think will be most likely to lose control (if you've hosted more than one party with the same guest list, you should have a working sense for who these people are). And yeah, pass out at your own peril.

That said, I still feed bad for what happened. Some of that behavior is just uncalled for past the age of 19. Covering oneself in beer? Vandalizing the shower curtains? Good God, maybe it's time to get some new friends? Ones not on loan from Bellevue?

In conclusion: if you host a party, you're going to get a mess. Probably a big mess. But try to manage the outcome by setting a good example and staying (relatively) above the fray.

Furious George

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine: Well, that does suck that your private e-mail was posted. But since it was, here are some unsolicited comments for you to consider -- If it was 3:30 and you were done and you simply were ready to fall asleep, as a good hostess, you should have had the presence of mind to begin asking people to leave. If you had hit a wall and were so exhausted that you couldn't even do that, perhaps you should have turned to one of your "good" friend to ask them to do the ushering out -- or at least take responsibility for the party. If you did neither I have to say it seems that you bear some responsibility for what happened.
Also, I am sure you have earned and deserve your apartment; but all the more reason to take more responsibility for it.
So, in the end, your friends should offer to help -- especially if they are your "good" friends. But jeez, give them a break, it was post 3:30 on NYE, they were drinking heavily and yes, a bit out of control. They most likely didn't even realize just how bad they were leaving your apartment.

Fritzpeterson

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Pope John Peeps II: "Public spaces are pubic spaces. I have no idea if that was intentional, but it was GENIUS.

jetztinberlin

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Yeah, at least your date didn't end up screwing some guy in the coat room right after your confessed your undying love...

winniemc

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @smithhimself: My thoughts exactly! No matter how fucking drunk, I'd never trash my friend's (or anyone else's for that matter) house without at least offering to help clean. Assholes.

@slut machine: You didn't deserve to get your place trashed. The people who did it are inconsiderate assholes, as are those here who feel the need to say shit because you're pissed. They would be too. Again, assholes.

DorothyZbornak

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> This isn't the first time Tracie has had ass issues (assues?): [www.ambrel.net]

Bos'un's Mate

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @htotheomo: I'm starting to get to that point now, at 27 (very nearly 28). Only typically, I lack the foresight to stock champagne and a nice cheese selection around the house. These days it's usually a six of Guinness, some pizza, Season 1 of Heroes on DVD, and a box of tissues for whenever Ali Larter, Hayden Pannetiere, or that Indian guy show up on screen.

Furious George

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Goodbye hangover: Gatorade Frost, large bagel, Schadenfreude, frigging off.

SylviaPlathWasFramed

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> BTW - does this portend more "o hey and for no really justifiably necessary reason at all here's a close-up of a rack" stories for 2008?

teledingo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @atipofthehat: I agree. Tsk tsk!

@slut machine: Not at all, I just think the cleaning agency might be ripping you off.
I think you should make your friends clean it themselves, personally, if you know who did it. Recommend arnica for your bum and Neosporin for your arm. And Emergen-C for the hangover, if still necessary.

jetztinberlin

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> If nobody left an upper decker, she got off pretty easy.

zibby

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @slut machine: Hey, some of us are all on your side. When you bring people into your home, it's totally different than what you do on the outside. That's your HOME. When you wreck up a hotel room, or a club bathroom, whatever. Public spaces are pubic spaces. But home is the sanctum, and no one should mess with that shit. Not on purpose at least. Asking for people to make amends is exactly the right thing to do. Exactly what I would do.

Pope John Peeps II

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Clarence Rosario:
Oh, no you didn't!

atipofthehat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> actually, this was a private fucking email and not meant as a gawker tip. josh is an asshole for posting this as it was not for public consumption. and i didn't ask for sympathy. i asked for the respect of my friends, who i got drunk on my dime and hosted an awesome fucking party for. the reason why i passed out was because it was 3:30 in the morning, and i don't do coke anymore, so i was down for the count. when i fell asleep, only my "good friends" were left in the living room.

and so if i have a nice apartment, i deserve what i get? why? because you're jealous? frig off, you fucks.

Tracie

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> In my day, when I passed out at my own party, I would wake up to find my wallet and the VCR missing. And I would be happy I woke up! Ach, these kids today with their glitter and their Dolly Parton posters!

La Cieca

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @CaptainFantastic: *Dingdingdingdingding!* We have a winner!

While SlutMachine has my sympathy to some extent, part of being adult enough to host a party and let a lot of people into your home means either staying sober enough to maintain some semblance of control over what's going on or thinking ahead of time to appoint some trusted friends who will keep an eye out for bad behavior while you're off passed out/barfing/making out/whatever.

This is a sad lesson I think we all learn at some point in our 20's. I remember one Halloween party in particular that I threw where I passed out and the next morning found a used condom in my bathtub, mysterious burn marks on the walls, and some guy passed out in my front yard who finally revived but didn't speak English and thus couldn't tell me who had brought him or how he'd gotten there.

apollonia666

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @OMGeorge: HA!

jetztinberlin

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Seriously, I think I need to go run a cleaning service. I was expecting the Second Coming of Hell from that estimate. This is profoundly not bad. Lame-ass, sure, but that is another matter.

jetztinberlin

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @SinisterRouge:
I know, right?
First floor/second floor/ roof access?
She better sleep in her kitchen cabinets.

dandelionbrowne

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @collegecallgirl: At the New Year's Party I attended, I just kept making sure that the cheese trays were full and that champagne was uncorked. It wasn't my party, and I was insanely rocked by numerous substances while doing this. Everyone was like, relax, it's not your party, and I'm like, I am so relaxed, I luuuuuuv catering!

CodePink

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Wait, so did Elvis Costello show up after she passed out?

OMGeorge

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Some people consider waking up from a hard night of partying with a sore ass as an accomplishment.

PS: Oral sex in bathroom, especially not your own bathroom, especially public bathrooms, is like tattos: a thing that sounds neat, edgy and counter-cultural but is, in retrospect, a disgusting thing that doesn't age very well.

gawkimo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> In the last two decades, I've hosted countless parties with coked-out, E-enriched, liquored-up libators and the worst damage at my place has been a few spilled drinks. On the floor. Where spilled drinks belong. Slut Machine needs a better definition of "friend."

BadUncle

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @GinaRomantica: Champagne waterboarding. How 2008.

cequirk

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I didn't go to the party, but got the email since she sent it out to the original invite list. As such, I was in the perfect position to enjoy the awesomeness of the tirade without the guilt of culpability.

collegecallgirl

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Someone menstruated all over a toilet seat at my wedding. OB tampon? Amateur hour.

Sarcastro

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Potluck wine and cheese dinners are for yuppie pussies, and conversing with people who throw/enjoy potluck wine and cheese parties is usually really boring.

New Year's Eve parties should be about dance-offs, being required to make out with all your secret crushes from college in a game of Spin the Bottle, singalongs to songs you usually feel guilty knowing by heart, and sneaking off to the coat room/bathroom to give consecutive blow jobs to "Rob from Vassar" and "Frat Boy Steve".

far-far

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Let's see...you write tales on the web of blowing guys in bathrooms under the moniker "Slut Machine". What did you expect, My Dinner With Andre?

Clarence Rosario

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> That looks like a fucking nice place. She better live out in bumblefuck or have 10 other roommates...otherwise, NO sympathy.

SinisterRouge

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> When Generation Y rules the world, all parties everywhere will be exactly like this. Woo-hoo!

KindlyButDumb

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Dear SlutM:
New Year = new friends.
Best,
Smith

smithhimself

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> After a few parties like this in my younger days ( we mixed in drugs to make it even more interesting, I now spend NYE with a couple of bottles of good wine, great snacks, and DVD's of Mystery Science Theater 3000. Pass out on the couch and no one cares.

Truculent

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I feel bad for her, but that's a damn funny story. A similar thing happened to a friend of mine in college. She hosted a "wine and cheese" party in an attempt to do something other (read classier) than the standard kegger, and boy what an error. Everyone drank the wine like it was beer and quickly entered a new, evil dimension of fucked up. Plenty of weird, destructive and hilarious shit happened that night, leading to quite a few tears the next day for my friend. She got over it though, and now it's probably one of the best stories from school. I'm sure this girl will laugh it off eventually.

fiveinchtaint

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> This is why I have only civilized potluck parties at my apartment. (Not kidding!)

bifteck-frites

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> ok, I sent her an email telling her I'd clean her place. wish me luck - this would be my favoritest stunt yet!

the supergoddess

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> A few thoughts:
1) Isn't this what happens when you get loaded and pass out at your own NYE party?
2) Who would want to pay to remain this person's friend?
3) We have just witnessed her mental maturity passing from early- to late-20s. She may not have realized it yet, though.
4) She doesn't wash her hands after using the bathroom?!
5) She has 2 bathrooms!?

CaptainFantastic

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Not washing your hands after using the bathroom and hosting a party? What could possibly go wrong? Oh wait, copious vomiting.

rayolite

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Well, sure, her guests got out of control and were assholes but instead of blaming them, maybe she ought to consider that she bares significant responsibility: 1) she set a tone for the party by getting that effed-up that she lost control of her faculties, 2) by getting that effed-up and passing out she lost control of her own party and thus the condition of her apartment and 3) she was a lousy hostess to "leave" her own party early.

Her friends weren't assholes, they were blitzed out of their minds, as was she. Now, for her to ask for some help is a reasonable request (if they don't do something to help, well then, perhaps, they ARE assholes); but to blame them and chastise them so when the hostess herself got so out of control that she passed out doesn't seem reasonable to me.

Fritzpeterson

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @surreal: That arm wound looks pretty painful, though.

Helman

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I also keep my most prized possessions hanging between my ironing board and dust-buster.

ThisIsWhy...

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @MisterHippity: The flat-screen is still there.

CaptainFantastic

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> um, is bidding open? because i'll clean it for $300. looked at the pictures after i read the letter and it looks nowhere NEAR as bad as it sounded.

surreal

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> That's astonishingly cool. Beats my own new year's all to shit. Way to go, tracie.

Pope John Peeps II

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> That's a pretty luxurious-looking apartment, with the two levels and all. Just saying.

Also, I hope Callie was conscious when someone poured champagne into her mouth from the second floor. Because there were airways and lungs there that it could have gotten into, you shit slices.

GinaRomantica

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> What a crybaby!

All this fuss over 3 shower-curtain rings and a glass of wine on the wall?

Yeah, I am mailing my check right now.

Mariallena

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I believe New York is a comparitive negligence state....

teledingo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Ok, I may as well be the first one to ask: If the last people to leave left the apartment's front door and roof door wide open, how does she know it was her invited guests who did all this damage?

MisterHippity

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> My advice to you is to start drinking heavily. By the time you reach 50 or so, it'll be too late to really matter anyhow.

Mediahohoho

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> when it comes to hosting parties, caveat emptor; it is amazing how people whom you consider your friends will so easily show an utter contempt for you and the things you cherish.

larrydarrell

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Nothing is as messy as their souls, Slut Machine. May God have mercy on them.

CodePink

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I had that same arm scar a month ago. It comes from drinking Scotch.

scarcat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> This is why when you host the party you have to stay sober enough to babysit people who are roaming around your house or get a roommate/trusted friend to be the designated minder.

I'm sympathetic to Slut Machine, but I've learned the hard way (not this hard, thankfully) that drunk people will indeed trash your house if you're not in the room or if you're passed out.

And yeah, really nice apartment.

VoxPopuli

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Hez: well, we were warned! (I kind of wonder if denton is still in that lavender period. not the best color on him, actually - washes him out a bit. and really, that sort of evil doesn't belong in pastels.)

so! I kinda want to volunteer to clean ms. machine's (FG, amazing!) house. how would I go about making this sort of devotional statement in a way that let her know I was serious?

the supergoddess

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @kromelizard: It works on anything. On non-white paint it does leave a slightly lighter patch, but that's still easier than touch-up painting, which never matches either.

lionel-mandrake

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @lionel-mandrake:
And here I was thinking that white paint is impossible to properly color match. Does it really work on wine? Because that's pretty damn useful.

kromelizard

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Wine stains on the wall? Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.

Also, when you're in your thirties, guests do stick around to help clean up. Guests that expect to be invited back, that is.

lionel-mandrake

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> I have the same shower curtain rings. I love them. They roll effortlessly.

TellTaleHat

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Emily and Michelle could not be revived for comment.

KarenUhOh

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> For a party kicked off with an internet dating contest, I'm not really impressed with the level of mess. I've done that much to my apartment all by myself.

kromelizard

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> That sucks, but such is life.

(BTW, Josh, taking the old title a little too literally, eh? What's next, you're bringing back Gawker Weekend?)

ZiggyStardust

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Good Morning, Anbar Province............
I'm only surprised that she's surprised.

PandoraSpocks

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> @Furious_George: At some point, around 32, you might realize that a cheese board, a split of champagne, a favorite movie and you is the best way to ring in the New Year.

htotheomo

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> Thats a pretty sweet apartment.

Soup

]]> <![CDATA["Most of the damage happened after I passed out"]]> If it's not an old adage by now, it really should be: "Always a guest and never a host be."

I've had to learn the hard way, on many occasions, that hosting boozefests for a bunch of rowdy twentysomethings is like letting chimpanzees out of the zoo. There's just no way that your place isn't going to get trashed, no matter