The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers - Gawker Comments

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Dorothy — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 21:44:04 EDT

Laser your own balls, then get back to me....if they are still attached and not molten, mutent, lava-like raisens, I'll consider it.@Furious George:

Dorothy

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

youngak — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 11:50:20 EDT

@Furious George:
Thank you, thank you. And it's daughter, brazilian daughter... ;-)

youngak

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Furious George — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 10:46:18 EDT

@youngak: You are doing the Lord's work, my son (daughter?). Bless you.

Furious George

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

youngak — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 23:18:01 EDT

*Full Disclosure: I own a successful laser hair removal spa in Manhattan*

That said, I feel comfortable to comment on these devices and say that certainly they don't "pack the same punch" as a commercial laser.

For example, my laser is a dual-wavelength system, launched in June of 2007. It's about 300 pounds, and draws so much power that I had to get my building's permission to utilize it in my commercial space. For sure these hand-helds would not get FDA approval for home use if they delivered the same energy as the commercial systems.

Secondly, the technology has gotten much better over the years: the BEST lasers for hair removal are the Alexandrite (755 nm wavelength) and the YAG (1064 nm wavelength). The Alex treats clients in the Caucasian spectrum. The YAG is *absolutely* necessary for highly-pigmented clients, anything else used may lead to burns. (My system has both, so I can safely treat ALL clients). The hand-helds on the WSJ piece are a Diode and IPL systems.

A note to all who may be considering laser treatment: ask specifically what kind of laser your facility of choice uses (the answer, ideally should be: Alex and YAG, either separately or in the same unit like mine).
I've found that many places advertise/sell the service as a *laser*, when in fact they may use IPL (intense pulsed light). IPL is basically a very very strong light bulb, but it's certainly NOT a laser, and does not deliver the long-term results that a real laser does.

youngak

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

nltisme — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 21:19:56 EDT

But can I use it to trim the housecats?

nltisme

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

BaconCat — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 16:34:29 EDT

@ms.creant: No kissing.

BaconCat

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

ms.creant — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 15:54:37 EDT

@BaconCat: I was thinking the Richard Gere role from 'Pretty Woman', but your Eddie Lewises work rather well, as well.

@SybilDisobedience: Agreed. I'll bring the cherry bombs and the cap guns. You bring the stink bombs and caps.

ms.creant

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

SuperBien — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:52:56 EDT

@MisterHippity: Mr. Yankovic, I presume?

SuperBien

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

friendlynerd — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:32:16 EDT

What if I just clear an armpit-sized spot on my back at a time?

friendlynerd

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

BaconCat — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:26:55 EDT

@MisterHippity:
Pow, pow, pow.
Laser beeeeeeeeeeeeeam.
uh huh, uh huh. uh huh.

I actually heard Holly Johnson singing your words when i played that in my head. Well done, sir. Kudo. No, it's worth it, Kudos.

BaconCat

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

MisterHippity — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:17:33 EDT

"Wait a minute. If this is your vibrator I'm using on my armpits, then ... Stop! Don't push that button!"

MisterHippity

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

MisterHippity — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:07:58 EDT

Don't wax, don't do it
If your body re-grew it
Don't wax, don't do it
When you wanna sun

Don't wax, don't do it
When there's stubble all through it
Don't wax, don't do it
Use a laser gun!

But shoot it in the right direction
Unless browless eyes are your intention

Throw away that cream!
Don't shave along that seam!
Just hit it, hit it
Hit it with your laser beam!

MisterHippity

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

BaconCat — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:04:04 EDT

@ms.creant: Eddie Lewis american soccer player for Derby County? Edward Lewis produccer? Edward Lewis the geneticist?

One decribes the genetics of body hair, the other two frequent prosititutes, so it's a toss up. :-)

BaconCat

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

BadUncle — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:00:15 EDT

Laser tag is going to be so much more intimate.

BadUncle

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

SybilDisobedience — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 12:56:18 EDT

@ms.creant: Your commenter name and my commenter name should get together and make some mischief.

SybilDisobedience

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

ms.creant — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 12:25:58 EDT

@BaconCat: You are my bizarro world Edward Lewis.

ms.creant

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Arhoz — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 12:16:43 EDT

@ALittleBitGothic: It was about the same price and worth it in my opinion. It's about the price of two laser treatments. You zap the hair and in about two-three weeks the hairs start falling out from the root, and then you're smooth for about 3 weeks. You're supposed to space out the treatments every 4-6 weeks and do it about 6 times to see long-term results. I've definitely seen a reduction in hair growth. Don't know if it's permanent though, I haven't committed to it long enough!
@zibby: The lighter you are and the blacker your hair is the better it works! All kinds of racist!

Arhoz

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

BaconCat — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 12:08:33 EDT

@ms.creant: Oh, you were talking about your legs... ... Well no good woman of the night would be caught dead without her stockings, so I assume that wouln't affect the value.

BaconCat

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

JSouth — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 12:04:02 EDT

@Furious George: And I think that it is probably people w/light (in my case hysterically pale) skin and dark hair that probably need it most. If you are blonde and have blonde hair, then your hair is frequently not noticeable, and if you have dark skin and dark hair, same thing. If I shave, you can still see the dark hair follicles under my skin no matter how smooth my leg is. I'm not saying that they shouldn't work it out and make it safe for all varieties of skin and hair colors, but the dark hair/pale skin combo gets less leeway when it comes to body hair.

JSouth

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

masser — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:35:36 EDT

I'm white and hairy. I would LOVE laser treatment, but people with pacermakers can't have it.

masser

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

zakkagirl — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:28:47 EDT

In all, if I didn't somehow manage to burn off my own vagina, I'd say that home laser hair removal equipment sounds like a smart investment. After all, it already costs nearly $50 for a bikini wax. What's next? $200 designer haircuts? Deep conditioning treatments? I'd rather get on with the rest of my life!

zakkagirl

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Truculent — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:27:36 EDT

Not a big fan of the completely bald look. A little decoration keeps it interesting. That said, I am not pointing a beam of coherent light at uncle willy. I'll take my chances with the electric razor

Truculent

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

zibby — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:20:24 EDT

Say, will this work on really coarse back hair? I need to know for a friend.

zibby

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

goldberry83 — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:18:00 EDT

Anybody who thinks I'm letting a damn laser anywhere near my ladybits is going to be sorely disappointed. And also just sore, as I will be forced to kick some serious ass if they even try to come near me with one of those damn things.

goldberry83

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Maulleigh — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:11:25 EDT

I need one of those. I've been going to the same place for TWO YEARS and I'm still hairy as bin Laden.

Maulleigh

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

ALittleBitGothic — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:07:43 EDT

@zburgz: Tell us about it? How, really, DOES it work? What were your results?

Oh, and was it cheaper in the UK?

ALittleBitGothic

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

ms.creant — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:06:56 EDT

@BaconCat: Possibly. However the scars on my legs from past razor nicks still would deflate my value, I would assume. But perhaps those scars could be removed with lasers as well? Technology is breathtaking.

ms.creant

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

ALittleBitGothic — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:05:26 EDT

@Furious George: Yay for the pale yet oddly swarthy!

ALittleBitGothic

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

mossdale — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:03:55 EDT

Yup, seems hair of any sort is on the way out. I'm starting a pool on how long till we look like the characters in THX 1138. It's gonna happen...

mossdale

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

ALittleBitGothic — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:01:53 EDT

I hate hate hate hate hate hate shaving, but also hate hair and stubble, so laser hair removal is a dream of mine.

ALittleBitGothic

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Arhoz — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:00:23 EDT

@brendastarlet: I have a tria, bought one on a business trip to the UK. Hurts like a mofo but it works. Not as quick as regular lasers but cheaper so you know, it's cool.

Arhoz

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Cheap Shot — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 11:00:01 EDT

You know, they should use nano technology to go down there and chop some hairs. Screw this racist laser!

Cheap Shot

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Furious George — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:56:44 EDT

Lasers and light-based technologies work by targeting pigment in the hair and can mistake dark or tanned skin for the enemy.

Lasers are also "racist" against blondes, too, because their hair is too light to be contrasted properly from their (presumably pale) skin.

It's not about skin color, per se; it's about contrast between hair color and skin color. The people who do best with lasers tend to be light-skinned people with dark hair.

Furious George

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Furious George — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:53:14 EDT

As a sci-fi nerd and a smooth-vag enthusiast, I am all for the personalization of laserbeam technology. In fact, if the laser hair removal industry is currently hiring lobbyists to discuss the virtues of laser hair removal on The Today Show, I'd like to submit my resume.

@smitty: Muff hair is going the way of armpit hair. It's not a cyclical trend. Muff hair is a relic. Either you're for progress or you're not a patriot.

Furious George

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

VirusWithShoes — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:49:29 EDT

@smitty: Yes. With a string quartet.

VirusWithShoes

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

averyde — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:44:02 EDT

Despite being a fan of the 70's bush myself, i can understand other women's desires to remove certain types of body hair for appearances sake. However, the idea of permanent hair removal creeps me out...don't you think you would feel a little ridiculous at seventy with a crotch a smooth as a child's?

averyde

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

smitty — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:41:29 EDT

Let's bring back muff hair back in style.

smitty

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

BaconCat — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:40:00 EDT

@ms.creant: Maybe if you used a little more of the hair removal you could fetch over 900 bucks a session. I'm just saying.

BaconCat

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

seejanewrite — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:34:09 EDT

@kittenfoo: Oooh, or used in rich girl catfights on shows like The Hills. Yes!

seejanewrite

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

VirusWithShoes — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:32:09 EDT

@kittenfoo: Ha! And bald-hot, too!

VirusWithShoes

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

kittenfoo — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:29:11 EDT

I have visions of vengeful wives or girlfriends tackling the "other woman," holding her down, and trying to make her bald with one of these things. I need caffeine.

kittenfoo

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

brendastarlet — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:28:21 EDT

If they can make it safe and cheaper, I would spring for one of these. I'm so sick of waxing.

brendastarlet

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

riskybusiness — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:27:52 EDT

Sexist and racist! I vote that women everywhere grow out their muffros in solidarity with their more-melanined sisters. I will also not shave my back or my nutsack as a gesture toward my hirsute-heinied brethren during this politically tense period.

Word to tha Gods and Earths!

riskybusiness

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

langtry — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:27:31 EDT

@flyoverstate: I think I'm getting hot and bothered!

langtry

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

flyoverstate — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:23:50 EDT

@ineffable.me: They do have lasers you can kill people with. It's the laser sight attached to my pistol. Helps with what they like to call "quick target acquistion." And it makes the bad guy real shaky when he sees that cute little dot in the middle of his chest.

flyoverstate

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

langtry — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:20:33 EDT

@ineffable.me: I'll take one, too!

And: doesn't this photo look like she's an Alien, her cl*t is in her armpit, and the 'laser' is really a vibe? I know, I have a sick sense of humor.

langtry

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Rumpelstilskin — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:17:25 EDT

Millions of dollars spent on Star Wars defense and all we get are smooth 'pits?

Rumpelstilskin

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

In Other News... — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:05:35 EDT

How many guys will soon tell stories of catching their wives in the bathroom with this thing re-enacting the "Get AWAY from her, you BITCH!!!" scene from Aliens?

In Other News...

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

donmiguel — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:03:50 EDT

Spectragenics, the company behind these lasers, burned blacks in the Bay Area for a few days last week in order to calibrate the gizmos. Their ad on Craigslist requested folks with dark skin. I signed up. They used different settings to test when your skin would blister and scar. They were shocked when I declined, or that someone would investigate them. Creepy.

donmiguel

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

In Other News... — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:03:16 EDT

Solution: just set the damn things on "stun".

In Other News...

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

FitnessMadeSimple — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 10:02:24 EDT

It's just a matter of time before some geek with too much time on his hands turns one of these into a laser gun. I can't wait.

FitnessMadeSimple

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Sarcastro — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:59:08 EDT

I laser-defoliated my balls for this?

Sarcastro

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

fiveinchtaint — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:56:41 EDT

@VirusWithShoes: This just brought us one step closer to the reality of laser cats.

[video.google.com]

fiveinchtaint

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

VirusWithShoes — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:55:48 EDT

Anne Hathaway looks great holding that sex-toy.

That'll do me for the rest of the week. Thanks!

VirusWithShoes

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

the third person — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:52:33 EDT

Since when does the WSJ partake in April Fool's Day hijinks?

the third person

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

VirusWithShoes — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:52:02 EDT

I can see these being mounted at the border with Mexico.

VirusWithShoes

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Jenniferhdaniel — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:51:34 EDT

Well, what if I want to blow up my excessive hair? What are your lame-ass lasers going to do for me then? Self-destruction includes follicles, yo.

Jenniferhdaniel

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

ms.creant — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:51:07 EDT

I refuse to buy a hair-removal device that costs more than I would as a call girl. I know my limitations.

ms.creant

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

BalknChain — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:50:06 EDT

It looks like she's blow drying her armpit hairs.

BalknChain

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

contradicto — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:47:27 EDT

@Botswana Meat Commission FC: Lou Dobbs would LOVE this!

contradicto

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Botswana Meat Commission FC — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:46:22 EDT

Lasers and light-based technologies work by targeting pigment in the hair and can mistake dark or tanned skin for the enemy.

This sounds suspiciously like one of those Malcolm Gladwell contest sentences.

Botswana Meat Commission FC

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

KarenUhOh — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:45:53 EDT

Oh. I thought lasers were just to break up the asteroids.

KarenUhOh

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

JinxyMcDeath — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:43:27 EDT

My cousins are Israeli and they say they never ever shave...they use at-home electrolysis. I can't figure out if they're ahead of us or way behind us...or whether this has anything to do with at-home lasers.

JinxyMcDeath

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

contradicto — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:41:25 EDT

@CaptainFantastic: No but I can't wait for Oprah to go all they-didn't-let-me-into-Hermes on them.

contradicto

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

CaptainFantastic — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:38:21 EDT

But will they work on redheads and albinos?

CaptainFantastic

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

CaptainFantastic — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:37:30 EDT

@contradicto: Were you at the meetings?

CaptainFantastic

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

scroll_lock — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:35:42 EDT

Rosa Parks is not only not giving up her bus seat, she'll burn her damn hair off with whatever gizmo she chooses, thank you. Each of my personal grooming thingamajigs work on all God's children, not just the pasty ones.

scroll_lock

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

contradicto — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:34:34 EDT

Let's not bother to fix that "burn the minorities" problem, because we all know they can't afford these things in the first place.

contradicto

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

ineffable.me — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:33:13 EDT

What's the point of having a laser if you can't kill people with it? Let me know when they make a Pink Laser Gun JUST FOR GIRLS! and then I'll give you a thousand femidollars.

ineffable.me

The Time Has Come For Women To Buy Lasers

Goober_Pea — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:32:08 EDT

So, basically this is just for Upper Class Goth Chicks?

Goober_Pea