Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly - Gawker Comments

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

sqwodaydc — Sun, 11 May 2008 00:22:54 EDT

@Don Is: some what? rurujurus?

cannot wait for the hip hopera about this trial.

sqwodaydc

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

NeverEnough — Sat, 10 May 2008 22:01:33 EDT

@hughman: I truly, un-ironically do.

NeverEnough

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

hughman — Sat, 10 May 2008 21:24:52 EDT

does anyone like R. Kelly? i mean,. really? maybe i'm just old.

hughman

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

VoxPopuli — Sat, 10 May 2008 15:40:50 EDT

@Don Is: Nice 30 rock reference.

VoxPopuli

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

HeyThatsMyBike — Sat, 10 May 2008 15:04:01 EDT

You know, I just can't listen to "Bump 'N Grind" or "Sex Me" in the same way anymore. They used to be such beautiful, classy ballads, and this whole affair has just really pissed that image away.

HeyThatsMyBike

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Lysergic Asset — Sat, 10 May 2008 14:33:35 EDT

@Shadowy Figure: Tell them (1) your great-great--grandfather was Emilano Zapata, (2) the laws of the United States shouldn't apply to illegal immigrants accused of crimes, and (3) that California should be returned to Mexico.

Lysergic Asset

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

SnarkTwain — Sat, 10 May 2008 14:32:16 EDT

The sketch artist would have been better off just drawing what the judge was reading.

SnarkTwain

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

shadowy figure — Sat, 10 May 2008 14:27:37 EDT

I'm incapable of joking when it comes to jury duty, as I find it that AMAZINGLY miserable. (I'm sure I'll receive another summons as soon as Tuesday just for saying this.)

shadowy figure

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Hez — Sat, 10 May 2008 14:23:15 EDT

Mister Kelly, we don't conduct legal proceedings in your toilet, so please don't pee in our jury pool.

Hez

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Lysergic Asset — Sat, 10 May 2008 13:18:51 EDT

@flossy: I don't share your taste in music, but I nominate this for Party Pick.

Lysergic Asset

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

NeverEnough — Sat, 10 May 2008 13:07:12 EDT

@Tnuc: Ignition! God, I LOVE R. Kelly. Has anyone seen the last chapters of "Trapped n the Closet"? Any theories as to why AIDS is called "the package"?

NeverEnough

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Zorica — Sat, 10 May 2008 12:53:14 EDT

@Don Is: A rural juror like Rory Journer whose pure furor endures a terrible murder?

Zorica

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

flossy — Sat, 10 May 2008 12:06:57 EDT

Please state your name for the jury.

Don't ask me what my name is,
Stupid bitch, I'm fam-ous!

Can you please tell us what happened on the night in question?

I was drillin' these chicks like Major Payne
Then I made it rain, baby I'd do it agaiiiin...

The jury finds you guilty. Were there any mitigating factors that should be considered for your sentencing?

My mind was telling me no-o-ooo... but my body, my bodeeeeey was tellin' me yessss...

flossy

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

r.n. spy hearts robert downey, jr. — Sat, 10 May 2008 11:48:04 EDT

@robot ninja spy: i meant "a bunch" or "too many." Take your pick. :)

r.n. spy hearts robert downey, jr.

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

r.n. spy hearts robert downey, jr. — Sat, 10 May 2008 11:47:08 EDT

@Don Is: People in rural areas know about this; this might have been a good idea if they hadn't delayed the trial so long, but even then, I think a bunch too many choir members and preachers think "I Believe I Can Fly" absolved him of any past or future sins.

Not even being snarky. Really.

r.n. spy hearts robert downey, jr.

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

mikedell — Sat, 10 May 2008 11:24:09 EDT

"Mr. Kelly, were you aware that urine can actually aggravate the jellyfish's stingers into releasing more venom?"

"Maaaaaan, how the **** I know? That ***** ************' trippin' talking bout get this ************' jellyfish off my face!"

mikedell

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

dandles — Sat, 10 May 2008 11:17:17 EDT

@snapfinger: R. Kelly does not associate with tricksty lawyers. Just tricks.

dandles

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

dandles — Sat, 10 May 2008 11:16:23 EDT

@Obviously Not Omniscient: I'm so glad I'm now following you, ONO.

dandles

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

rosaluxembourgeoise — Sat, 10 May 2008 11:12:56 EDT

@CaptainHangNail: @Obviously Not Omniscient:
Ça suffit!

Brought to you by my bleeding eyeballs.

rosaluxembourgeoise

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Lysergic Asset — Sat, 10 May 2008 11:03:36 EDT

@CaptainHangNail: Les filles se cachent de vous jusqu'à votre retour en prison. Merci à vous, je suis accro à Google Outils linguistiques...

Lysergic Asset

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

flossy — Sat, 10 May 2008 11:03:24 EDT

As long as he sings his testimony over a silky-smooth bassline, he'll be fine. Shit, he'll have an acquittal and a hit single.

And for the record, those raucous onlookers were both me, and what I actually yelled was "I love you, you pedophile!"

flossy

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Koreanish — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:57:01 EDT

That beard makes me want to cover my eyes.

Koreanish

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Don Is — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:55:24 EDT

They need to find some rural jurors.

Don Is

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

DonPardoCalrissian — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:48:10 EDT

"jury selection could weed out any tainted jurors"

And during the trial Kelly could wee on any untainted jurors.

DonPardoCalrissian

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

cassandra — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:45:32 EDT

@belltolls: They probably get it in jail, though. They don't like pedophiles in jail.

cassandra

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

C.H. Sanson — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:33:15 EDT

I don't believe he is going to fly.

C.H. Sanson

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Private Hangnail — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:21:00 EDT

@Obviously Not Omniscient: où sont les jeunes filles? Je voudrais d'uriner sur eux!

(This comment is brought to you by Google Language Tools)

Private Hangnail

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

if_i_only_had_a_heart — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:17:58 EDT

@snapfinger: and the corollary is the prosecution leaking details so the defendant is done

ugly all the way around

if_i_only_had_a_heart

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

valarmorghulis — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:14:14 EDT

@snapfinger: I don't think he knows anybody with that high of a moral character.

valarmorghulis

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

belltolls — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:11:25 EDT

Defense argument is weak as most people think the Sun-Times went out of business years ago.

belltolls

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

snapfinger — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:08:44 EDT

You know, when I was working as a court reporter, one of the dirtiest tricks in the book for the defense attorneys was to leak details of the case to the press and then claim their clients couldn't get a fair trial because the published story had tainted the jury pool. Not that R. Kelly would even associate with tricksty lawyers of low ethical standards...

snapfinger

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

mydeadgayson — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:06:35 EDT

@Tammany_Fall: did i get drunk and hold a seance?!

mydeadgayson

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

Lysergic Asset — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:03:33 EDT

@mydeadgayson: perceptive.

Roman Polanski has been working steadily 30+ years after his tryst with a 13-year-old. Does R. Kelly speak French?

Lysergic Asset

Jurors 'Uncomfortable' With R. Kelly

dandles — Sat, 10 May 2008 10:01:24 EDT

@Don Is: No, but Michal's might have the components. Spray on glue, and a chia pet you can grind up and paste to your face.

R. Kelly, it's dunzo for you if the jurors are making faces and covering their eyes this early on, because the opposing council will know exactly who to target throughout the trial. But on the plus side, if you like kinky sex, prison is going to love you. You'll be the belle of the ball, as Bette Midler once said.

dandles