The ice bucket challenge, it should be clear by now, is not about charity so much as showing your social network how charitable and fun-loving you are. And what accomplishes that more fully than donning a superhero outfit and tasering yourself into a kiddie pool?
Yes, about a week after the dump-cold-water-on-your-head-or-donate-$100-to-ALS-research viral game first reared its head on your news feed, we've reached the peak of the form. "Everything you do, I can do it better," self-styled "citizen superhero" and Gawker-styled "idiot weirdo" Phoenix Jones says at the beginning of the video above. And he's right. So let this be the end.
After a sad-looking friend dumps the water on Phoenix Jones's head, for reasons unknown to anyone but Phoenix Jones, another person shoots him with a stun gun, and he falls backward into even more water. It looks painful. But what a spectacle!
"Wow," you're thinking to yourself. "He must be really passionate about ALS." And maybe he is. He did give the requisite $100, after all. What have you done?