Yuppies Burst Williamsburg's Borders, Spilling Out in All Directions

"Williamsburg," an upscale lifestyle brand named after a long-lost neighborhood in Brooklyn, long ago outgrew its apocryphal status as a home to underpaid fauxhemians and became home to wall-to-wall overpaid yuppies. Thankfully, there is more space in Williamsburg for rich people than ever before.

Whereas up until recently the bulk of Williamsburg's more upscale developments and amenities were confined to the Northside of the neighborhood—leaving the Southside for non-whites and people with sub-six-figure incomes—upscale developments have now fully infiltrated the Southside as well, rendering the entire physical landscape of Williamsburg proper one big yuppie haven, from the river to the Lorimer L train stop and beyond. ("Yuppie," like "hipster," is a word that is as enraging in its overgenerality as it is guaranteed to be instantly understood by everyone. Both of these maddening words also have value due to the fact that those who best fit the description are those most likely to object to the use of these words.) A real estate story in the New York Post today makes clear that Williamsburg's Southside ("the scruffier, more Hasidic relative to the hipster-friendly North," lol) has now sprouted enough luxury condominiums to make itself a full-on part of the Williamsburg Lifestyle Brand Autonomous Area. For example:

The Oosten [currently being marketed in China!-ed.] will up the neighborhood's game, luxury-wise. Consisting of one- to six-bedroom units, with interiors by the Dutch designer Piet Boon, it will include Jacuzzis in the penthouses and townhouses, an art gallery and amenities previously unseen in this part of Williamsburg (lap pool, playroom, sauna, roof terrace with reflecting pool).

And just wait until the Domino Sugar Luxury FutuRoboCondo From Beyond is ready. Roof terraces as far as the eye can see.

Have fun riding that L train at rush hour, motherfuckers.

[Photo: Flickr]