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It's a situation that all parents can relate to: You're picking up some lacy underthings at the local mall's Victoria's Secret, cradling a squirming baby with a fully loaded diaper in your arms, and resisting the look in the infant's eyes that seems to say Just drop me. It's OK. No one is watching this time, and that carpet looks really soft. If you're America's Most Scrutinized Mom, however, you fight off the instinct to let go of the child and finish your transaction, and instead opt to show the world what a good parent you are by attending to the baby's needs immediately and publicly. Says Us Weekly:

No changing table? No problem. One June 4, Britney Spears, 24, with 9-month-old son Sean in tow, picked up pink thongs at a Victoria's Secret in Mission Viejo, California. Her next order of, uh, business? Changing Sean's dirty diaper — on the floor next to the cash register! Says the source, "Britney then tried to hand it to an employee," but the salesperson wouldn't take it.

The brief item is unclear about whether the pronoun "it" in their source's story refers to the dirty diaper or the baby itself, a vagueness compounded by the fact that we can easily imagine a frustrated Spears finally deciding to hand off her controversy-attracting bundle of joy to a salesgirl in the hopes that she could give the child a better home.