On this morning's Yo on E! show, DJs Graham Funke and Stone Rokk, frequent masters of record-spinning ceremonies at celebrity-infested local establishments like Area and Les Deux, are induced into talking some smack about the famous clientele to whom the clubs' buzz-craving owners slavishly cater in hopes of keeping their venues from falling out of favor with Hollywood's incredibly fickle starfucking crowd.

Unsurprisingly, Britney Spears' name comes up; not only is she guilty of using her handlers to hijack an evening's set list with overplayed Madonna and Prince tunes, but the only reliable method for curtailing her attention-whoring activities is to humiliate her off the stage with the music of her currently much more successful devirginizer. Also revealed: Brad Pitt possesses the ability to dance, and Hillary Clinton thinks that she can connect with young voters through 16-year-old Jesus Jones songs.