Cosmopolitan honored singer/paparazzi fucker-with John Mayer as their top "Fun, Fearless Male" of the year today. Yes, he is fun in a "nice guy from your high school who became sort of an ass when he went to Hamilton and realized he could get girls" kinda way. But fearless? Upon what criteria is this most noble of titles based? Looking at some of the other honorees, it could be one simple thing: dating Jessica Simpson.

The yellin' Texan's paramours past and present Dane Cook (terrible comedian) and Tony Romo (some sort of athletics player) were also honored at the world renowned ceremony, making an awkward threesome of people who have all mounted the singer while father Joe Simpson watched from behind the wall, through the eyes of a portrait. Though, this bit of trivia obscures the bigger question: what are all these people (some pretty famous) doing showing up for such a meaningless, kind of embarrassing awards event? That they didn't even win! (John Krasinski, noo!) Their publicists are really the fearless ones. [Just Jared] Below, John Mayer being not so fun but maybe a little fearless with a pap.