Teetering teenage titty tableau titillator American Apparel has been wrestling this week with the question of how to get millions of dollars to keep itself alive while still being run by Dov Charney, a crazy person. They've done it! How? They found the minute handful of people in North America who A) have millions of dollars to invest, and B) do not think Dov Charney is a crazy person. What are the chances?

"Dov is an eccentric, and he's being butchered by investors and the press," one of the investors told the NY Post. Well, yes, I suppose all portions of that statement are objectively true. But why hand over $15 million to a company controlled by such an... eccentric? Because this whole "utter financial collapse of the company" was not his fault.

Indeed, the Canadian investors believe it was a 2009 immigration crackdown at American Apparel's Los Angeles factory that is largely to blame for its crippled finances, sources said.

Canadians! What an optimistic bunch. Dov Charney will doubtless be celebrating in his usual fashion.