On Thursday night, China launched Tiangong-1, its first space laboratory, and the first step in an ambitious plan to build a complete manned orbiting space station by 2020. Naturally, to show off its handiwork, the Chinese government released an animated video simulating the launch of Tiangong ("Heavenly Palace"), set to the soaring strains of, uhhh, "America the Beautiful." Why? "I don't know how to answer your question," Chen Zhansheng of the CCTV propaganda told The Guardian. "I cannot help you." Clearly a ploy to lull Americans into a false sense of security while the Chinese use the space station to beam mind-control rays into the brain of their puppet-president "Barack Obama"! [Guardian]