Imagine waking up in D.C. this morning and having to muddle your way to the Metro (it's what they call the subway) and go to your government job. Yeah, that totally sucks. Then when you get to the subway you grab a free copy of The Examiner, the Capitol's free commuter newspaper, and it has this headline. Your day just got a little awesomer!

Now, I've made my fair of mistakes (god knows I am king of the typo) and written some shitty headlines in my day, but I never wrote something like "Reader Fingers Murder Suspect" and it wasn't about a movie with Kate Winslet violating Casey Anthony. I mean, what copy editor thought this was a good idea? Do they not get the joke? Ah, who cares. Thanks for the laughs, Examiner.