With just a couple weeks left in December, it's looking like 2012 is going to go down as the hottest year on record here in New York City (average temperature 57.2 degrees—balmy!). Coincidentally, it looks like 2012 will also be the hottest year on record in Dallas. And in Houston, and in the rest of Texas. And in Detroit. And in Cleveland. And in Missouri. And, fuck it, in the entire United States of America.

With any luck, we'll just get Miami weather up here in NYC, and all the world-ending catastrophes will wait for the next generation. Down with winter! Santa's wearing a swimsuit this year! The elves have drowned due to melting ice caps. :(

[Photo: AP]